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  1. Public Bookmark 2

    Words:
    17,827
    Works:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    2

    18 Jul 2026

  2. Rec 10

    Tags
    Summary

    “You… she…. what?”

    “It’s not… it’s not really that weird. It’s like… it’s like how girls like to watch gay porn sometimes, you know?” Matt raises an eyebrow at him, and Jay hurries through. “Or like when you make two girls kiss in front of you.”

    “You make girls kiss each other?”

    “No, I mean, I don’t. I’m just saying, guys do that. It’s, like, a thing guys do.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,674
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    25
    Kudos:
    113
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    842

    16 Jul 2026

  3. Rec 22

    Tags
    Summary

    In the winter Matt gets a tattoo of Jay's signature on his upper arm. “Cool, right?” He says, rolling his sleeve up. Jared zooms in on the tattoo silently. Owen looks nauseated. Matt smiles so big that he's scared his face is going to get stuck like that.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,063
    Chapters:
    1/3
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    144
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    730

    13 Jul 2026

  4. Rec 15

    Tags
    Summary

    “Did you fuck her?”

    Jay doubts that that was on the table, that there was any world in which Kayla would have fucked him, in which their coffee date turned movie-on-the-couch would have turned into anything but a few chaste kisses, the game ending firmly at first base. Jay laughs because it’s funny. 

    The laughter bubbles in his chest, and where he wouldn’t normally push the issue, he launches himself back into Matt’s space, loops his arms around his neck, and pulls him in for a hug.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,402
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    23
    Kudos:
    162
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    811

    13 Jul 2026

  5. Rec 18

    Tags
    Summary

    Efforts to get a show at the Rivoli are derailed by a trip to the cinema and its several consequences.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,414
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    41
    Kudos:
    108
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    954

    05 Jul 2026

  6. Rec 20

    Tags
    Summary

    Shit was like Ringu. A grainy YouTube video with less than 100 views when Matt stumbled across it.

    Nirvana the Band Live at the Rivoli, April 3, 2009

    or

    Matt and Jay's Calgary-based harsh noise duo gets a show at Worst Chance...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,708
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    98
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    753

    05 Jul 2026

  7. Rec 25

    Tags
    Summary

    (Jay storms out of the apartment in a blizzard, gets into a bar fight, and is left with a concussion. Matt finds him and takes care of him. Jay initiates sex. Life goes on.)

    This is wrong, this is so wrong, he has no idea what’s even happening right now– some part of Matt attempts to replay these thoughts like a mantra, louder and louder in his mind, throwing them out like a spike strip to stop the getaway car of this, his deepest, darkest, longest-held desire. It doesn’t work.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,014
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    118
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    1,775

    02 Jul 2026

  8. Public Bookmark 18

    Tags
    Summary

    in media res. jay is still trying to get better at asking for what he wants. matt is still desperate to give it to him.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,584
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    121
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    1,427

    22 Jun 2026

  9. Rec 17

    Tags
    Summary

    (comic zine) Matt has a new plan to play the Rivoli, and this time it's a big one.

    Updated and slightly expanded version of a comic I've posted to tumblr and twitter!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    0
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    21
    Kudos:
    150
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    731

    15 Jun 2026

  10. Public Bookmark 5

    Tags
    Summary

    “Oh, I see.” Matt pauses. He nods, as if a realization has finally hit him. “I just need to convince you, Bird.”
    “Matt—”
    “C’mon, man,” he tries. “What, you want me to get on my knees and beg?”
    Jay quirks a small smile as he imagines that.
    “What, you think I’m that easy? Really?!” He’s already sinking to his knees.

     
    Jay is harder to convince than usual.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,518
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    80
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    947

    10 Jun 2026

  11. Rec 51

    Tags
    Summary

    There are no windows in the Skydome’s cramped detention room so nobody gets the moment that Jay’s nose starts bleeding, dripping heavily into his lap. His hands are still cuffed behind his back. He tries to wipe the blood off on his shoulder and succeeds in smearing it across his lips, over his left cheek. It keeps dripping like a leaky faucet. 

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,988
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    81
    Kudos:
    218
    Bookmarks:
    51
    Hits:
    1,419

    08 Jun 2026

  12. Rec 45

    Tags
    Summary

    On July 11, 2025, Canadian singer-songwriter Jay McCarrol was arrested for the murder of Luke Lalonde, a member of his live band. He was charged with second degree murder and sentenced to 8 years of incarceration in a federal correctional facility.

    Famously, despite damning and public video evidence and multiple eyewitness accounts, McCarrol has denied any and all connection to the crime.

    On December 25, 2026, Jon “Matt” Johnson was arrested on charges of domestic terrorism. He was sentenced to 12 years of incarceration in the same facility.

    The audio you are about to hear was recorded in the Collins Bay Multilevel Correctional Institution between the dates of February 19 and March 3, 2027.*

    *Certain sections have been edited for brevity.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,863
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    212
    Bookmarks:
    45
    Hits:
    1,508

    04 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    for the movie lovers… so amazing to read something and know every homage… so so beautiful i love their little world <3

  13. Public Bookmark 24

    Tags
    Summary

    The whiteboard is the catalyst, but it really isn’t. It tips over a series of dominoes that lead to Jay’s bedroom, get under his feet, and walk him out the door. But, in the morning after, when the whiteboard has that big, capital D ‘Don’t’ on it, and Matt won’t be honest about having written it, despite it clearly being his handwriting, the whiteboard isn’t the catalyst, because Matt gets up on the couch and erases it, and it’s almost like it wasn’t there to begin with.

    A retro/prospective on Jay McCarrol's fame.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,017
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    60
    Kudos:
    156
    Bookmarks:
    24
    Hits:
    1,371

    02 Jun 2026

  14. Public Bookmark 17

    Tags
    Summary

    Jay is seeking something more out of their burgeoning sex life, but he's frustrated by Matt's lack of stamina. They end up at a sex shop, hoping to purchase something that will help.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,927
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    11
    Kudos:
    156
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    1,679

    28 May 2026

  15. Rec 25

    Tags
    Summary

    Somehow, Matt has become an adult before Jay. He goes on runs, lifts, cooks at home, reads, takes more than 2 showers a week, goes out on the weekends, does his laundry consistently. It drives Jay crazy. It's not fair. He goes back to sleep, pulling the covers over his head, hoping that maybe he'll disappear.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,196
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    94
    Kudos:
    218
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    1,994

    17 May 2026

  16. Rec 52

    Tags
    Summary

    Obviously Matt’s aware that Jay looks good in a suit. It’s more something about the way he holds himself, still and straight, self possessed. That's not a Jay posture. It’s the weirdest thing, it makes Matt feel almost starstruck – so much so that when their eyes catch, it punches the breath out of him. There’s Jay, regular, but there’s someone else too, also Jay. That's when it catches up.

    Maddy and her friend think Jay is his boyfriend. That word, boyfriend, crashes into his head so hard that for a split second he’s afraid he said it out loud. Earlier, Jules asked how long have you two been… and Matt, assuming he knew the end of the question, said since we were like 12 or something. Jay heard that happen. Not only that, he played along. They grinned at each other conspiratorially about it.

    The only reason Matt would ever go to a family wedding is if he and Jay could get a show at The Rivoli out of it. The plan: Play the wedding, bring the house down, and get his cousin and her friends to book them for an after party. The part where they pretend to be a couple, threatening decades of load-bearing repression, comes out of nowhere – at least for Matt, it does.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,199
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    152
    Kudos:
    263
    Bookmarks:
    52
    Hits:
    3,483

    17 May 2026

  17. Rec 23

    Tags
    Summary

    (Matt and Jay mistake a popular night club for a cult. A plan formulates. They think taking molly is part of an initiation ritual. Matt gets more outgoing, but Jay just really wants his hair played with. Back-alley hand stuff.)

    “No. I want it.” Matt’s voice has dropped. “Give it. Fucking give it to me.” Matt sounds more like he’s fighting over the wicked transparent N64 controller than a load of cum but who cares? Not Jay, clearly.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,049
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    204
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    2,093

    15 May 2026

  18. Rec 59

    Tags
    Summary

    “My mind is a black box, even to myself.” He shrugs.
    “You’d tell me though, if something was super fucked up?” Jay says, letting go of him.
    “You know me, man. If something was even a little fucked up, you think I’d shut up about it?”
    ---
    Matt comes to a realization, makes a plan, and Jay doesn't really notice at first.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,621
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    75
    Kudos:
    260
    Bookmarks:
    59
    Hits:
    2,521

    12 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
  19. Rec 95

    Tags
    Summary

    “I met a dental hygienist that was wearing a dog collar when we first got here, we danced and then he gave me a mint from a little baggy. It made sense that he’d carry those around, but then…” He just shrugs.
    “Oh, Birdie,” He laughs, but it’s desperate, like a cry for help from the bottom of a well. “Was it - minty?” His voice sounds three octaves too high.
    “I couldn’t tell. It’s so loud in here.”

    ---

    Matt and Jay plan to enthrall the Rivoli’s new booking agent at a gay club. Jay accidentally takes ecstasy thinking it's a breath mint, and Matt is subjected to torments previously unique to the trenches of WWI. It's going to be a long, long night.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,712
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    111
    Kudos:
    479
    Bookmarks:
    95
    Hits:
    4,994

    23 Apr 2026

  20. Rec 47

    Tags
    Summary

    “Look, Jay, I’ll make it up to you–”
    “How are you gonna make it up to me–”
    “Come on, man, I–"
    “Like, are you gonna suck my fucking dick about it?”
    As soon as the question is out, Jay snaps his jaw shut so hard it makes an audible click.

    ---

    Matt scares another girl away. Jay finds it in his heart to forgive him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,295
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    346
    Bookmarks:
    47
    Hits:
    3,357

    17 Apr 2026

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