carocactus

socks with cactuses on them



Recent works

Recent series

  1. Words:
    275,945
    Works:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    16
  2. Words:
    142,961
    Works:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    31
  3. Words:
    133,331
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    20

Recent bookmarks

  1. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "Please consider what I’m about to say. Think of it as you return to your mother. You must put as much thought into it as you can. Will you? Please, promise me you will.”

    “Yes! Whatever it is, I’ll consider it.”

    “Eventually Lord Hades will have mercy upon you. He will. I know that must sound strange—the most severe of the gods showing mercy where his kindred won’t—but it’s the truth. The Olympians are more… unreliable. The only way I can see to protect the Underworld and in turn you and your mother is this: Bind yourself to me.” His hands tremble. He brushes his thumb along the crook of Zag’s throat, so very sweet, even when he’s rigid with tension. “Wed me.”

     

    Raised by his mother far away from both Olympus and the Underworld, a strange series of events leads Zagreus to meeting a faceless, nameless Chthonic god.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    715,782
    Chapters:
    112/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    3,674
    Kudos:
    7,594
    Bookmarks:
    1,262
    Hits:
    348,292

    30 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Will needs a date to his mom's wedding. Mike volunteers.

     

    “I have an idea,” says Mike.

    Ice cubes form in Will’s stomach. “How dangerous is it? Like, should I call Dustin to talk you down, or should I call Nancy to be ready to drive us to the hospital?”

    “No,” says Mike, “you can’t tell anyone or it won’t work.”

    “Or what won’t work?” Will asks. It’s like picking up a rock you know a spider will be under.

    Mike gets up and closes Will’s door. Hopper doesn’t make them keep it open but sometimes Will does anyway, because every now and then lying around alone with Mike on his bed just makes his chest ache too much. If the door is open he can tell himself You can’t do anything right now, someone will see.

    Mike leans back against the door. His eyes are lit up with that special maniacal gleam that the Wheelers get right before they do something insane, like when Nancy says, “Then we have to go kill Vecna ourselves,” or whatever. “Take me to the wedding,” says Mike.

    “Yeah,” says Will slowly, “you’ll be at the wedding. Obviously.”

    As your date."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    59,047
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    1,090
    Kudos:
    18,209
    Bookmarks:
    3,779
    Hits:
    270,455

    31 Dec 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    from: [email protected]
    to: [email protected]
    subject: Re: what the heck spell check

    Coach Lasso,

    I can assure you that my transfer has nothing to do with your club's relegation, nor is there anything that Richmond has done in error. Rather, I have spoken with my editors and we’ve agreed that this is the most appropriate course of action.

    I wish you all the best in the season.
     
    -Trent Crimm
    +44 3032 723956
    [email protected]
    The Independent
    Northcliffe House
    2 Derry St
    London
    W8 5TT
    UK


    Language:
    English
    Words:
    85,558
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    2,045
    Kudos:
    5,665
    Bookmarks:
    1,867
    Hits:
    145,257

    10 Aug 2022

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Course provides advanced instruction in avoidance of the phenomenon commonly known as "jumping the shark." Prerequisites for this course include Introduction to Friendship, Contemporary Best Friendship, The Politics of Emotional Baggage and Cohabitation 207. Students may wish to simultaneously enroll in our sister course, Introduction to Non-Traditional Romance, but said enrollment is optional.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    48,844
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    352
    Kudos:
    5,384
    Bookmarks:
    1,637
    Hits:
    112,994

    22 Jan 2022

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Paperwork for the new head of Q-Branch,” Tanner said.

    “Of course.” The words were like glass in his throat. Smoke inhalation was a bitch. His brain felt slow and foggy, like it was full of smoke too. “Who shall I take them to?”

    M lifted one white brow. “They’re for you, Quartermaster.”

     

    Bond and Q are drawn together by names, work, and a certain Aston Martin. In which Q is kidnapped once, Bond is poisoned twice, and Eve is a badass on at least three occasions. AKA that time I tripped and wrote 80,000 words of 00Q.

    All titles unapologetically stolen from Alfred, Lord Tennyson.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    89,065
    Chapters:
    15/15
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    813
    Kudos:
    4,869
    Bookmarks:
    1,625
    Hits:
    84,659

    20 Nov 2021