Chapter Text
Admin Notice
One of your Associated Crawler(s) has selected a class featuring the Manager Benefit. Your NPC tag has been changed from Guild NPC to Manager NPC.
You are no longer tied to a single Guildhall and will instead accompany your Associated Crawler(s) throughout the remainder of their Dungeon experience.
Admin Notice
Your employment contract has been modified.
New Primary Assignment: GC, BWR, NW Princess Donut the Queen Anne Chonk Best In Dungeon
All previous assignments of one (1) additional Crawler(s) have been terminated.
Admin Notice
Manager Benefit changes applying. Please wait.
"Goddamnit, Donut! God fuckin' damnit!" I shouted as the notification blocked out my vision and then half my HUD vanished without a trace.
"And scene," Donut said, waving her paw as I pressed my thumbs to the corners of my eyes and sank down into my chair. My HUD was still gone and no amount of clicking and pointing and hovering was getting it to come back. There was a buffering wheel obstructing parts of my vision and making me dizzy as I glared at the two Crawlers that had turned into an even greater pain in my ass.
"Whoa," Carl, the big dumb fuckin' ape of a man, blinked stupidly at Donut and I. "What's happening?"
Admin Notice
Manager benefit activated. Please accept all Heads Up Display changes.
System Update
NPC Classification Updated
Previous Classification: Guildmaster (Non-Combatant)
New Classification: Manager (Combatant)
Combat restrictions have been removed.
WARNING
As a result of your new classification the following privileges have been revoked:
- Tunnel Network Access
- Information Codex Access
- Guildmaster Housing Assignment
- Passive Dungeon Observation
- Tutorial Script Access
- Protected NPC Status
WARNING
Your physical location is now tied to your Associated Crawler(s). Should prolonged separation occur, contractual relocation protocols will activate.
"Mordecai dear, that's Carl's line. You should pick something else," Donut said as she looked up at me then turned her attention to Carl. "Carl, he's upset because I chose the Former Child Actor class. I was acting! Isn't it great?"
"That's not acting," Carl gritted out, glaring down at her. "It's called lying."
New Feature Unlocked: Manager's Insight
Once per day you may perform an enhanced appraisal of an object, creature, location, quest, or participant. This information will come from the Information Codex but will not be the complete Codex entry.
"It wasn't a lie," Donut pouted as she looked up at him. Despite her projected confidence her ears were pinned back and her tail was drooping slightly as she stared at him. It was clear to anyone with eyes that despite everything, Donut was still a child and Carl was still the closest thing she had to a parent. That didn't make me any less enraged. "Not technically. I picked the Artist Alley Mogul as my third-floor specialty. It's basically the same thing anyway, so I don't see why he's so upset. It said I received all the benefits except the 25% discount. or the Shield spell. Or that Pathfinder skill."
"That's like all of the usable benefits, Donut," Carl sighed, rubbing his palm over his face while his other arm held a squirming Mongo against his chest. After a moment he let out a slow breath and looked intently at Donut, his eyes flickering across her form as if he could find some physical change that indicated her new benefits. "At least your Charisma is now higher. And you have that Cockroach skill."
"And I'm immune to poison and disease!" Donut preened at Carl's approval.
New Feature Unlocked: Experience Gain (Re-Enabled)
You may now:
- Gain Experience
- Level Up
- Train Skills
- Equip Gear
New Feature Unlocked: Inventory Access (Re-Enabled)
Your inventory has been re-initialized. You currently have ten (10) open slots for inventory.
New Feature Unlocked: Equipment Slots (Re-Enabled)
The following Equipment Slots have been enabled:
- Head
- Face
- Neck
- Chest
- Nipples
- Arms
- Hands
- Fingers
- Legs
- Feet
- Toes
New Feature Unlocked: Achievement Eligibility (Re-Enabled)
You are now eligible to receive Achievements
New Feature Unlocked: Quest Eligibility (Re-Enabled)
You may now receive personal quests. These quests may conflict with with the objectives of your Associated Crawlers.
New Feature Unlocked: Sponsor Visibility (Re-Enabled)
Sponsors may now observe, follow, and financially support your continued survival.
New Feature Unlocked: Follower Count (Re-Enabled)
Previous Views: 89 Million
Previous Followers: 30 Million
Previous Favorites: 8.1 Million
Current Views: 106,001
Current Followers: 232,445
Current Favorites: 10,221
I winced at that drop in follower count. It made sense, I was a much older crawler, and my crawl had aired during a time where not everyone was able to watch it live. Most of those remaining followers were probably people who had forgotten to unfollow me in the intermediary time between the end of my season and now.
Still, that sting didn't stop the frustration threatening to bubble over like an over-boiled pot of water.
There wasn't even an option for me to not accept the changes, just a series of next buttons that guided me through the various changes to my HUD. I clicked through every single one without even bothering to skim the alerts, knowing exactly what the AI was endlessly bombarding me with. Even as the seconds ticked by I could see bits of my HUD lighting up again, changing into a modified crawler's interface.
New Feature Unlocked: Adaptive Race Selection
At the beginning of each new floor for a limited time you may select a new race from a curated list generated by the System AI. If no race is selected within 230 seconds of your arrival on the floor the System AI will randomly select and assign your race for you.
I actually paused at that notification, my face going slack as I read it and then read it all over again.
That... Was new. Really new, not just a reactivation of a previous skill. It sounded like I wasn't restricted to my own catalogue of forms anymore. I could choose my own race again. I could be a Skyfowl again.
Then my mind processed the 230 second time limit and I scowled again as another alert popped up.
Admin Notice
Previous Classification: Dungeon Asset
Current Classification: Dungeon Participant
Welcome back, Crawler.
Oh. This AI had fuckin' jokes already. We were all fuckin' doomed.
My HUD finally cleared, leaving me with all my windows and stats and tabs scattered around like leaves in a windstorm. I pinched the bridge of my nose between my thumbs and let out a long, slow breath before I straightened and began to flick my various tabs and windows into something that made a semblance of sense.
"Yeah," I said dryly, checking my skill tab and noting that for whatever reason the AI had put Dance skill lvl 10 in my top usable skills. Piece of shit. "And you've received the Manager benefit."
"Oh yeah," Carl said, looking over at me curiously. "What is that?"
"That's me," I growled, glaring even more sternly at him as my HUD finally cleared. "I'm the manager. From now on, for the remainder of your time in this godforsaken place, I have to travel with you as a member of your fuckin' party."
"Yay!" Donut cried, bouncing excitedly as she looked up at me.
"No, not yay," I gritted my teeth, covering my face and trying not to pull my hair out as I glared at her. "I was supposed to transfer to a magic guild after this floor. I like runnin' the magic guild. My room gets bigger, and I have access to my potions and more spells. Now I'm trapped with you fuckers. Everywhere. Every road and every settlement and every time you sleep or eat or stop to brush your teeth. I'll be forced to spend my time with you. Away from my room and my clothes and food."
I tried to pull up the Information Codex out of pure habit, only to scowl when I got a large red window obstructing my vision.
ERROR: Information Codex Access Denied.
And then, knowing exactly what to expect, I tried to pull up my latest episode of Serennese Rose that had been recording on my tunnel feed.
ERROR: Live Tunnel Access Denied.
"Oh gods... And I've lost my tunnel access. No more television." Admittedly that stung more than I would like to admit. I liked TV and internet forums where I could argue with idiots who didn't know how to watch TV properly. "No more access to the Information Codex."
I growled and turned away from the two crawlers, trying to compose myself.
"That wasn't cool, Donut," Carl said softly to her, but I could hear him gently stroking her to soothe any upset that my reaction was causing.
Part of me felt bad. She was just a kid. She didn't know any better. Hell, neither of them had bothered to ask about the Manager benefit, so she didn't even know what she had been doing by choosing that class with it.
"Well, congratulations, Crawler," I said as I turned to glare down at Donut. "You are now Princess Donut the Level 13 Former Child Actor Cat. Welcome to the third fuckin' floor." My eyes immediately turned to Carl, who tensed as I glared at him. "Your turn, asshole."