Chapter Text
Shen Qingqiu was a simple man. If he heard about a mission that required tracking down a beast, of course he'd jump at the opportunity to take it. In complete honesty, all he heard was 'beast', 'unknown', and 'study', and he was out the door. It was a slow month, okay? He hasn't seen a single spirit beast around the bamboo house in a long time since he allowed Luo Binghe to stay in his side room.
He's sure it's just coincidence or that protagonist halo of his. However, it didn't really matter, did it? It still meant he had not seen a single creature. He used to go out and pet or study the strange amalgams of creatures that wandered around the leisure house. The last beast he saw was a strange mix of a duck, raccoon, and an iguana. He barely got to check the delightful thing's plumage before it skittered away.
So forgive him for being a little impulsive, but it wasn't like he was in any real danger. Liu Qingge was coming as well.
The War God of Bai Zhan coming on a night hunt—well, it was in the middle of the day, but whatever—meant he didn't even have to worry about fighting at all! His shidi would have that perfectly taken care of. That meant he could focus on studying this unknown creature.
However, halfway to their destination, a worry arose. What if his hot-blooded shidi scared off the beast before he figured out what it was? They could get in trouble for that. Plus, the damages... What if someone got killed?
Shen Qingqiu had to shake his head to snap himself back to the present. Liu Qingge was fighting some carnivorous plant with suspiciously shaped tentacle roots. The not-so-subtle plants had attacked them, but Shen Qingqiu wasn't terribly worried.
Those plants didn't have sex pollen nor had an appetite for human fluids. Shen Qingqiu still remembered the chapter with these living innuendos. They did nothing and were only there as a gag. He's pretty sure they were added specifically to him spite because the noises that came from the plant were unnecessarily lewd.
Airplane was truly shameless.
He glanced away from his shidi and noticed tracks. Without thinking, he started following them. Maybe these are that unknown beast's tracks, he considered.
He was far from his shidi before he realized he should've waited... Well... It should be fine. There were rarely any lethalities in the hands of beasts unless it was plot relevant, usually it was Luo Binghe doing the killing. Most beasts were for one-off wifeplots. Really only there to push a scenario and die swiftly after Luo Binghe won the nameless maiden's heart.
With that in mind, Shen Qingqiu continued following the tracks, they almost looked like dog tracks. How interesting. He hasn't seen nearly enough dog-like beasts in his time here. His mind was already rotating names and behaviors.
Ooo, what if it's a Acid-drooling Shadow Walker?
A canine beasts that can disappear into dark corners and spit acid like a viper. He had always been curious how they looked, and he was never free enough to visit his shimei in the beast taming peak to assess her menagerie of beasts.
Song Qingyu was never spoken about in PIDW—a crime truly, but if he had known there was a beast taming peak before, he would've probably cursed at the system for forcing him into the scum villain's body instead of a Xun Shou disciple.
Shen Qingqiu let out an annoyed huff. Okay, maybe he was still annoyed about it. He hadn't known about Xun Shou Peak until he attended a Peak Lord meeting and saw Song Qingyu. She had been holding a Spiked Star Eater, so obviously, he wanted to talk to her badly, but he had been held back by Liu Qingge and Shang Qinghua. He didn't get a chance to talk to his shimei before she left to her peak, and she was practically a worse recluse than the original goods! He never sees his shimei!
This place was truly his personalized hell at times. Doesn't his shimei know they could talk about beasts together? Maybe she was frightened by the original goods? Damn that scum villain once again!
Shen Qingqiu was snapped out of his daydreaming by an earth-trembling roar. Oh right, the beast. He summoned Xiu Ya as he saw a large shadow move through the trees.
Okay, maybe running ahead wasn't a smart idea, he can admit that now. He took a step back when the shadow moved out of the bushes, and to his surprise it was just some wolf humanoid.
His surprise soon melted to annoyed disappointment. A werewolf. Seriously? He got excited over some werewolf? It wasn't even night time! Why was a werewolf out?! But honestly why was this considered a night hunt when it was daytime too?
"Of course it's the most generic beast in the monster manual," he groaned out loud. At least it wasn't some lizard beast that secreted an aphrodisiac, there's 32 of them in PIDW. He counted. A werewolf was one of the better choices, but he was still disappointed.
The beast circled around him, growling. Everything about werewolves was done to death, and nothing about this one was remarkable. He doesn't have faith that the Great Master Airplane did anything interesting with them under the surface.
He sighed and picked up a stick from the ground. "Lycanthropy is used often to make a love interest more dog-like for romantic opportunities," Shen Qingqiu mused to himself. He tossed the stick in the air. The werewolf's ears twitched as its eyes followed the stick.
"Let's see how much of a hack you really are, Master Airplane." Shen Qingqiu caught the stick and then threw it into the forest. As he suspected, the beast ran off to catch it like a regular dog. Huh. That's a little disappointing, but at least it should be easy to deal with until his shidi found his way over.
He put away Xiu Ya, in most tropes scary beasts were usually pretty docile until they saw a weapon. Maybe that's why it growled at him. Xia Ya was a pretty sword, but a sword is a sword to anything running on animal instincts.
Hm, maybe they should trap it. If it was some lazy wifeplot beast, then the lycanthropy should be easily cured. Well, in most stories, lycanthropy can be cured. Mu Qingfang would probably know.
"Shen Qingqiu!" Liu Qingge called out with some tone that sounded like irritation. Oops, his shidi was probably mad at him.
"Over here," he called back. Better get scolded now than when the werewolf returned.
"An unknown beast running around and you decide running off is wise. You didn't even have a plan! How are you even a scholar?" Liu Qingge said, Cheng Luan already drawn.
Shen Qingqiu covered his face with his fan. If you put it like that, it does sound pretty dumb, he thought while averting his eyes.
"Shidi, please calm yourself. This one knows what the beast is, no need to worry," Shen Qingqiu said after regaining his composure, moving his fan in a placating gesture. "Nothing more than a sick person, we can just trap them and get them treated," he said.
Liu Qingge looked unconvinced. "You always think every beast is nothing to worry about," he accused.
Shen Qingqiu felt like he should probably be offended, but he was far too amused by the angry expression his shidi had. Sometimes he looked like a puppy trying to be intimidating.
"Oh, shidi—" he tried to calm Liu Qingge before his shidi suddenly seized his arm and pulled him back.
Shen Qingqiu stumbled behind Liu Qingge before he realized that the werewolf returned. "Liu-shidi, wait!" He tried to stop his shidi, but Liu Qingge had already run off.
"Lycanthropy can be cured! Don't kill them!" He said with panic as he followed the growls and metal clashing. How could Liu Qingge move so easily through the trees and roots? Or was he really getting old?
He could hear them fighting, he was getting close. Then, Cheng Luan barely missed his arm as it embedded itself into a thick tree. Oh no, he knows Liu Qingge was strong, but he would still need Cheng Luan. He tried to pull the sword out with no avail.
"Shidi, wait!" He yelled, summoning Xiu Ya instead. He ran over to the commotion, Liu Qingge was pinned on the ground. Without thinking, he launched his sword at the werewolf, aiming for its side to get it to recoil enough for his shidi to retreat.
The beast recoiled, roaring in pain. Shen Qingqiu stopped himself from running to grab the other peak lord. A trained warrior was faster than some lowly scholar, he'd only get in the way or get hurt. Surely, Liu Qingge would see the opening he gave him. Surely, he would escape—
Liu Qingge got up and instead of retreating as Shen Qingqiu hoped, the man pulled back his fist and punched the wolf square in the jaw.
"Huh?" Shen Qingqiu voiced with an owlish blink. He could only stare, absolutely dumbfounded. Did Liu Qingge just punch a fucking werewolf? Who punches a werewolf?!
The War God tackled the beast onto the dirt, wrestling a beast twice his size, and Shen Qingqiu was confronted with the fact he might not be as desensitized to PIDW's nonsense as he initially thought. He called Xiu Ya back, thinking how he could possibly intervene in this confusing scenario. This had stopped being xianxia, clashing swords and cool magic, instead devolving to shenanigans from a fighting game.
Liu Qingge would fit right in. Shen Qingqiu sighed. They didn't even have a way to transport the werewolf. They were too unprepared. Maybe they should buy a carriage?
Shen Qingqiu looked towards the fight just as the werewolf managed to grab Liu Qingge and threw the warrior at him. They were both crashing into the ground by the time Shen Qingqiu even considered dodging. They were seriously under-prepared. This was getting embarrassing.
Shen Qingqiu tried to sit up, but his head throbbed from hitting the floor too hard. He barely noticed Liu Qingge still on him until he felt the other quickly scramble off him. He sat up, nothing seemed to be spinning, so he thinks he's okay...
He turned to tell his shidi they should think of a way to trap the beast, only to find him already running back into the fight. A part of Shen Qingqiu was confused as to why he was surprised. Why did he even try? He groaned and rubbed the back of his head. How was he not concussed?
At least Liu Qingge seemed to be having fun? But seriously, they needed to think of how to take down this thing. Surely, there's some bullshit knock out technique used in the novel that he's forgetting. Like a palm strike or some stupid, theatrical chop in some vital area with enough force to kill a regular person.
"C'mon, c'mon, there's gotta be a wifeplot about it," he muttered as he pressed his knuckle into his forehead. Something about anticlimactically knocking out a target. He knows he was mad about something like it before.
"Do werewolves have the same meridians as humans?" He wondered, watching the beast run around Liu Qingge like some sort of boss battle from a video game. Wait.
"That's just the attack pattern of a Bloodborne boss!" Shen Qingqiu yelled in English because he refused to explain what any of those words meant to Liu Qingge. He was already dangerously reaching his limit on Airplane's lazy writing.
Unknowingly, he had alerted Liu Qingge right when the werewolf lunged at him. He managed to dodge instead moving his arm in the way to take the attack. He wouldn't have noticed in time if not for Shen Qingqiu's urgent cry. He didn't know what it meant, but the franticness made him think it must've been a warning.
The War God grabbed the beast's snout with his free arm, and twisted its head to the side. He faintly remembers the former Xun Shou Peak Lord giving the head disciples a lecture on beasts. He doesn't remember most of it, but he does remember one thing.
Canine beasts only listen to things they perceive as more dominant.
So he did the only thing that seemed logical: he bit the werewolf back.
Shen Qingqiu was about to take advantage of his shidi pinning the beast down and tie it up with something, but he had completely stopped in his tracks when Liu Qingge bit into the werewolf's neck. What the—
Who would think of that?!
The scholar barely had a minute to process the sight before him because he heard the werewolf let out a cry of a wounded dog, letting go of his shidi's arm in the process, and the next moment, Shen Qingqiu hears trees crunching and breaking after his shidi was launched off the beast with a violent and frantic thrash.
How was he supposed to react to that?!
Shen Qingqiu blinked, reassessing his options, he couldn't follow the werewolf. It ran deep into the forest judging by the cries getting further and further away, he'd only get lost again following it. Plus, he had to make sure his shidi was fine.
Oh, right, his shidi! He ran towards the knocked over trees. He stepped over roots and hopped over the tree trunks. It was quite a few, was Liu Qingge even okay? War God or not, being thrown through some thick trees would knock the wind out of anyone.
He could never guess how durable people were. Some could survive a mountain falling on them, others would break both their legs in a trip. Half the time due to a wifeplot that was unknowingly triggered.
Shen Qingqiu heard a groan and it made him pick up his pace. "Qingge? Qingge! Stay awake, you probably have a concussion!" He yelled, not even aware of his slip up.
There weren't any wifeplots triggered, as far as he knows, so in theory, Liu Qingge could be fine. Unless he's supposed to have some meet-cute with a Qian Cao disciple or something. He felt his dread spike. Okay, yeah, he should make sure his shidi isn't at death's door.
Shen Qingqiu reached the end of the trail of destroyed trees, finally finding Liu Qingge. He hopped over a fallen tree to reach his shidi. He winced when he found the War God pinned under a thick tree.
His cheeks were a little red, oh no, had he accidentally fallen on some sex pollen flower? This really was a wifeplot! Don't worry shidi, your shixiong will ensure that your honor is intact!
"Shidi, allow this one to—"
"Ughh, m'fine," Liu Qingge interrupted him. He looked away, almost bashfully. Suddenly reminding Shen Qingqiu of a maiden for some reason...
Ah, shidi, don't you know such expressions are dangerous? He worried.
"You're pinned under a tree, please, let this—"
"This one is fine," Liu Qingge gritted out, taking matters into his own hands. He forcefully dragged himself out from under the fallen tree. "See? Fine."
Shen Qingqiu's eyes were fixated on his shidi's wounded arm. It shouldn't be twisted like that, he thought with a shiver. "Um, shidi... Your arm," he pointed out, covering his face with his fan, unable to look at it any longer.
"It's just an arm," Liu Qingge said sharply, which was followed by a pop that made his bones cringe. What creature even is my shidi? Shen Qingqiu asked himself. Who just relocates their own shoulder like it was merely an inconvenience?
"Stop hiding, it's done," Liu Qingge said, something close to irritation in his voice.
"We should still take shidi to see Mu Qingfang," Shen Qingqiu didn't put down his fan. He just knows he's making an unsightly face, and he can't lose any more credibility than he already lost today.
"This one is fine," Liu Qingge dismissed like there wasn't a whole chunk of his arm missing.
"Shidi is going to bleed out," Shen Qingqiu insisted.
"This one had worse injuries and survived," the War God once again dismissed.
"That isn't comforting, shidi! We're going to Qian Cao!" The scholar finally snapped, genuine worry on his face. "Liu Qingge isn't immune to damage! Come on, we can return later if shidi wishes, but now, he's injured," he pleaded.
When there wasn't a hint of change in his shidi's eyes, Shen Qingqiu gave up and just grabbed his good arm and started dragging him back towards their carriage. He's pretty sure they have medical supplies in there. How could one man be so danger prone? Doesn't he know that people will worry about him?
"This—" Liu Qingge almost refused, then his eyes lingered on the clear worry on his shixiong's face and noticed the slight tremble in his grip.
"Mn," he nodded, he didn't think he could fight Shen Qingqiu if he was like this. His martial sibling keeps surprising him even now.
Liu Qingge was sitting on a cot, his arm being tended by a girl with blunt bangs and a blunter attitude. Mu Qingfang was reviewing the events Liu Qingge had just recounted and judging by the slight tremble in the healer's shoulders, he was barely holding back laughter.
Mu Qingfang cleared his throat. "Please remind this lowly healer what Qingge's response was to this beast?" He said with an unreadable smile.
Liu Qingge had the feeling he was being mocked somehow...
"I punched it after I lost Cheng Luan," he stated simply. Wei Qingwei had retrieved his sword, apparently the tree it had embedded itself in had a magnetic core. Cheng Luan had been stubbornly staying in for a while, however, the blacksmith had happily taken the tree after removing Cheng Luan.
Mu Qingfang nodded sagely. "And when it bit you?" He urged.
"I bit it back," Liu Qingge replied again. He heard his shidi snort, then cleared his throat again.
"Ahh," Mu Qingfang nodded to himself. "You bit it. Of course."
Mu Qingfang turned away from the warrior, barely stiffling snickers. He bit it. He bit a werewolf. That's the first time he's heard of someone doing that. He breathed in to calm himself and turned around. He needed to be serious.
"Well, this one wishes to congratulate Liu Qingge for being the first peak lord to contract lycanthropy this one has ever treated," Mu Qingfang said pleasantly.
"How?" Liu Qingge asked.
Mu Qingfang stared at the middle distance for a moment, and then looked at his martial sibling. "It's truly a mystery, but let's treat what we can before Qingge transforms," he gestured to his head disciple. The girl stopped treating Liu Qingge and left without a word.
"How do you treat it?" The warrior asked. He honestly hadn't heard much about lycanthropy. He remembers it's a type of sickness.
"Well, traditionally we cut off the infected limb before the moon rises," Mu Qingfang said casually while gesturing to the table of medical tools. The bonesaw almost seemed to gleam with excitement. Liu Qingge felt a little apprehensive, he's not exactly sure he could bounce back from losing a limb as easily as Wei-shixiong.
"The other options?" Liu Qingge asked slowly.
Mu Qingfang sighed and noticeably wilted. "Ugh, no one wants the traditional method nowadays, how boring. First, Shang-shixiong says that's it's too 'extreme'. Now, everyone wants the new method," he complained.
"So there is a new method," the warrior argued.
"Yeah, yeah," the healer huffed. "Shang-shixiong helped develop a significantly less invasive treatment," he said with a wave of his hand.
"Then, I want that treatment," Liu Qingge insisted.
"You're no fun," Mu Qingfang sighed.
"You're sick in the head," Liu Qingge glared.
"And you're boring," the healer dismissed.
Mu Qingfang's head disciple returned with a small leather bag in her hands. He smiled at the girl. "This master thanks, Xiao-Bao," he said as he took the bag.
The head disciple gives a non-committal shrug. "This disciple will be outside, if shizun needs her," she said, giving a half-hearted salute, and left without another word.
Liu Qingge slightly scrunched his nose, Mu Qingfang was far too lax for his standards. His disciples would be punished for such disrespectful behavior.
"This will be your treatment," the healer announced. "Since you're a wuss."
"What was that?" Liu Qingge narrowed his eyes at the healer.
"These are tablets of Howling Moondew powder. Shang-shixiong had found out they fight against lycanthropy by neutralizing the virus's effects," he explained, completely ignoring his shixiong's accusatory tone. He pulled out a rather large tablet from the bag. "Most commonly it's administered rectally," Mu Qingfang said with a smile.
"Rect—? No!" Liu Qingge yelled, scandalized after the word clicked in his mind. He felt a shiver go up his spine. Absolutely not.
"You're never satisfied," Mu Qingfang sighed and then pulled out four more tablets. "Fine, then swallow these, they'll cure you all the same albeit less effectively." He placed the pills on Liu Qingge's outstretched hand.
Swallow them? That was certainly a better outcome than... the latter option.
Liu Qingge put two in his mouth and swallowed them before Mu Qingfang could give him water. The healer stood there with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Yeah, sure, that too works," he said with a nod. "Please don't choke Qingge."
"S'fine this one had to swallow worse," Liu Qingge dismissed as he finished taking the pills. He had to take bigger pills when he was a child, something about needing something in his system. He could never remember, but his father didn't believe in crushing his pills into his tea or food, so he always had to take them whole. At least now he never had problems with pills.
Liu Qingge looked up at his martial sibling. Mu Qingfang had that expression he always had when he really wanted to say something but was holding himself back.
"What?" He demanded.
Mu Qingfang breathed in and smoothed over his expression. "This one is going to call someone to come pick Liu Qingge up, just in case there's trouble with the treatment. Shixiong should rest while he waits," he smiled passively. He bowed his head and left the room.
Liu Qingge felt his hackles rise. Mu Qingfang was never this formal when they're alone unless he's planning something. What was he planning?
Liu Qingge had waited in the room impatiently. He wanted to leave while Mu Qingfang was away, but he was quickly caught and escorted back to the room. He always forgets that Qian Cao disciples are frighteningly observant, just like An Ding disciples.
Ugh, he always felt like he was being watched whenever he landed on An Ding.
Well, he couldn't do anything at the moment. If he ran, he'd be paralyzed and tied to a cot. He's been through that treatment enough times to know they only advance the paralyzing poison every time he builds an immunity to it.
So waiting it was.
He lays back onto the cot. He was buzzing with energy. He wanted to chase something down and kill it. He huffed to himself and closed his eyes, either to finally attempt meditation or to take a nap, he's not exactly sure. But he eventually dozes off without realizing it.
It's only when he hears loud chatting that he wakes up. He felt groggy, how long had he been out? He sat up, a blanket bunching on his lap. So he was asleep long enough for someone to notice and give him a blanket.
He set it aside without much thought. He felt himself perk up a little when he heard Shen Qingqiu's voice. Was he going to pick him up? He could admit to himself that the idea was pleasing.
He felt something behind him move. He looked behind him as the door opened, and he froze.
"Shidi, this shixiong will be taking care of you while you... recover..." Shen Qingqiu's voice trailed off, and Liu Qingge immediately grabbed the tail, that he's positive wasn't there before he slept. He could feel it thrash in his hand, desperately trying to wag. Absolutely not!
"My shidi has dog ears!" Shen Qingqiu said with barely concealed delight. Ears?!
Liu Qingge placed his free hand on his head. Fluffy dog ears. No... Of course! Of course, he had to see him like this. This was humiliating.
"Liu-shixiong, please don't grab your tail so harshly, you'll hurt yourself," Mu Qingfang said pleasantly.
Liu Qingge looked up to glare at the healer, subconsciously, he felt himself bear his teeth. This was why he was so pleased with himself before. He knew. He probably gave him the wrong number of pills to allow this to happen. That shameless man! He didn't even seem ashamed, he could see him trying not to laugh!
However, Liu Qingge's attention was taken away from the healer by gentle hands. He looked beside him and jumped uncharacteristically away from Shen Qingqiu, since when did he get so close? He felt his cheeks warm up and his grip on his tail tightened even if it was starting to hurt.
"Ah, this one didn't mean to startle his shidi," Shen Qingqiu soothed like he was dealing with a nervous beast. And Liu Qingge hates how much it calmed him.
"You have to let go of your tail, canine tails are very delicate, shidi. You might dislocate something," the scholar said gently. Those delicate hands, pried his hand open, releasing his tail. He put all his mental energy into keeping his tail from wagging.
"There," Shen Qingqiu said softly and started petting his tail. "Nothing seems to be harmed, all the vertebrae feel fine. Ahh, what a beautiful coat!"
Liu Qingge felt his mind spiraling from all the soft touches. He would pass out from all the mental exertion, this felt worse than his training days. He couldn't take it anymore and he got off the cot, facing his shixiong in a futile hope to avoid getting pet again.
This was embarrassing. He was far too thin-faced for this. He felt like he was going to pass out. He can't let Shen Qingqiu grab his tail again.
"Don't do that," he said bluntly.
Shen Qingqiu blinked and then had the nerve to look sheepish. "Ah... Well... This one apologizes to his shidi. This shixiong got too excited," he said apologetically.
Liu Qingge slightly relaxed and instantly tensed up again when he felt his tail start wagging again. Nope. He wouldn't be so easily swayed by Shen Qingqiu's pitiful expression. He was stronger than this. He was a cultivator, damn it!
Mu Qingfang cleared his throat, reminding both his martial siblings he was still there. "Well, now that Shen-shixiong is aware of our dear War God's predicament, he should care for him until he recovers. This one had already filled in shixiong of Liu Qingge's care instructions," said the healer, avoiding the warrior's glaring.
"Of course! This shixiong will do his best to care for his shidi," Shen Qingqiu said with visible determination. He turned to Liu Qingge again. "Shidi can stay in the bamboo house while he recovers. This one still has to oversee a testing period, so once it's done, we may stay on Bai Zhan Peak if Shidi prefers it!"
Liu Qingge was positive his face was on fire. How could he be so shameless! By chance, he glanced at the healer, subconsciously looking for confirmation that such an upfront proposal was truly said out loud. Judging by the look of shock on Mu Qingfang's face, yes, Shen Qingqiu had really proposed what he proposed out loud.
Liu Qingge grabbed his tail after he noticed it was thumping against the wall. He should refuse. He should tell Shen Qingqiu he couldn't just get away with such proposals just because he had a beautiful face and dazzling, dangerously sincere eyes and a sweet smile and—
Damn it.
"That... That should be fine..." Liu Qingge said. He truly was a dog, he's pretty sure he'd bark if asked if Shen Qingqiu gave him that expression again.
"This one has an extra room shidi may stay in," Shen Qingqiu said with a smile. Liu Qingge tilted his head slightly. The only extra room he recalled belonged to that little disciple that always glared at him whenever he stepped on Qing Jing.
Shen Qingqiu noticed his confusion and clarified. "This one had relocated Binghe and Ying-er to the head disciple quarters with Ming Fan in the meantime. They all seem to be getting along these days, so this one is positive that Binghe won't mind," Shen Qingqiu said.
Liu Qingge felt a little vindicated that the little cretin would be thrown out, even if momentarily. That boy has been trying to sabotage him since he's been trying to— ahem. It's not important. As far as he's concerned, he's won, and he's pleased.
"Mn." Liu Qingge nodded.
"Amazing, some of Shidi's things have been dropped off here, so preparations shouldn't take so long," Shen Qingqiu said, already gathering Liu Qingge's things that were left near the door.
Hm, it seems one of his disciples had taken the liberty to pack a few of his things... They think they're so clever. Liu Qingge will double their exercises for the audacity of thinking they could get rid of him so easily… when he recovers.
He followed his shixiong without much thought, he could feel his tail twitching in his hand, trying to thrash out of the hold to wag freely.
