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“So how’s it feel to hit the big 5-0, brother?”
It's Robby's birthday and Jack Abbot is going to fuck that old man.
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
06 Jul 2026
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“Still not in the mood for talking, Jack.”
“No?” Jack stares at Robby for a long, steady beat with sharp, analytical eyes. “Okay.” He nods. “So we’re not talking.”
So they don’t.
Immediately post-season 1. In which Abbot helps Robby the best way he knows how: fingerbanging him into the mattress.
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
05 Jul 2026
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Robby finally piped up: "Kind of a shame, though. Guy seemed like your type."
Jack felt himself wanting to bristle, quickly controlling it. Because what the fuck. They'd been entirely wrapped up in each other in the year since Pittfest, Robby finally going to therapy, letting them get more serious than the fuckbuddy deal they'd had going before that. Jack had thought things were going well. "I have a type?" he challenged, raising his eyebrows.
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
05 Jul 2026
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Jack was poised for a beautiful three-pointer when Jake spoke, "So, hey, what's it feel like to get fucked?"
The surprise of it scattered his focus for an instant, but figuring that was what Jake wanted, Jack let muscle memory pull him through, releasing the basketball—and getting nothing but net, fuck yeah.
Then he looked over at Jake and tipped his head, nonchalant. "Vulnerable."
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
05 Jul 2026
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Lifting himself just enough to be heard, Robby shook his head. “It’s not like that, Jack. No evidence needed.”
“It sure as hell looks like it’s like that,” Jack said, his anger bleeding through despite his best effort to keep himself in check.
Robby looked directly at Jack for the first time since Jack had arrived. His eyes held a mix of shame and pain, and Jack was furious at the thought that somehow Robby thought he had to excuse the person who’d done this to him. But before Jack could say as much, Robby rocked him to his core by saying, “I asked for this.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,753
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 162
- Kudos:
- 1,983
- Bookmarks:
- 367
- Hits:
- 14,431
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
04 Jul 2026
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“You okay?” Robby asked, concern lacing his voice, all of this attention now on Jack.
“Yeah, yeah. It’s—fuck this is dumb.” Jack mentally braced himself. “So you’re on Grindr, right?”
“...Yes,” Robby answered hesitantly, his brow furrowing in confusion. “And I know you know that, so…” He trailed off and raised his eyebrows, questioning.
Jack did some quick mental math on how to have this conversation without humiliating himself and came up empty, so he took the direct approach. “How would you advise an older bi guy who’s new to the whole ‘sex with men’ scene?”
Jack comes to Robby for help, but things don’t go as planned for either of them.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,271
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 133
- Kudos:
- 1,487
- Bookmarks:
- 276
- Hits:
- 11,127
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
04 Jul 2026
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"I want to be alone, Jack," Robby said, short and sharp and pissy.
Fucking great. Apparently in the 45 minutes since Jack had last seen him, Robby had gone from devastation to anger. This would be fun.
"It's nice to want things," he drawled, deliberately light. "I wanted to walk out of Iraq on my own two feet, but hey. No plan survives contact with the enemy and all that."
Robby turned then, looking at him over the top of the couch, face drawn, eyes dark in the low lights. "Yeah? You my enemy?"
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,021
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 304
- Kudos:
- 3,851
- Bookmarks:
- 506
- Hits:
- 25,842
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
03 Jul 2026
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Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them (or Draco Malfoy's Guide to Stop Dying and Start Living Instead) by dustmouth, nerakrose_hparchive
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
19 Sep 2018
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Malfoy is way too interested in coroner reports for somebody who's definitely not looking for ways to die, Harry wants to be friends with him, and Ginny wants to break up with Harry.
Features: Little League Quidditch, an abundance of bath bombs, happy endings, and gay robots in space.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 96,144
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 588
- Kudos:
- 3,222
- Bookmarks:
- 1,344
- Hits:
- 90,388
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
27 Jun 2026
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To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Sent: 10/20/92 at 15:22
Subject: Karsite Tapestry 11/14Good afternoon,
I hope this email finds you well, Prof. Ancunín.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,147
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 102
- Kudos:
- 580
- Bookmarks:
- 153
- Hits:
- 3,836
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
18 Jun 2026
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But … But that would mean …
That would mean everything might have been real. The villagers might have been right. And Gale …
Gale might have just found a fae in his backyard.After his divorce, Gale moves to the countryside in search of a quiet life.
He finds more than he bargained for.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 104,494
- Chapters:
- 24/24
- Comments:
- 1,293
- Kudos:
- 1,046
- Bookmarks:
- 247
- Hits:
- 26,119
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
14 Jun 2026
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“You are so good to me.”
It is only because he is so close that he notices the subtle stiffening. Gale’s jaw clenches, for a moment, as blood pinkens the tip of his ear, then rushes to his cheek and nose. It lingers and just as Astarion notices the quickening of Gale’s pulse, he speaks, “It was nothing; Haldark’s is barely out of my way.”
His voice is a touch too high and Astarion eyes him curiously, an idea niggling at the back of his mind.
“Still,” Astarion whispers, once again nosing along the line of Gale’s neck to find a soft place to kiss him. After lingering in it a moment, he pulls back to watch Gale’s face and finishes, “You are always so good for me.”
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Astarion just wanted to goad Gale into running an errand with him. Instead, he discovers a new kink of Gale's they've yet to explore and oh, do they explore it.
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
11 Jun 2026
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Gale leaves a letter for Astarion to find in the winter.
Series
- Part 3 of Drabbles and Shorts
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 530
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 18
- Kudos:
- 43
- Bookmarks:
- 3
- Hits:
- 245
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
11 Jun 2026
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Cool Intentions by patheticfangirl for SpellSparkler
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
14 Feb 2025
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If Gale overheats, he might explode. Someone has to cool him down...
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,540
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 48
- Kudos:
- 276
- Bookmarks:
- 31
- Hits:
- 1,826
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
09 Jun 2026
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The Weight of a Wanting Heart by Femme (femmequixotic) for Vaysh
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
29 Oct 2014
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After nearly two decades hidden away in the Wiltshire countryside, Draco Malfoy’s surprised to see a familiar face come into his local.
Career Choices: Harry: retired/beekeeper; Draco: weathermancer
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,992
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 90
- Kudos:
- 2,557
- Bookmarks:
- 470
- Hits:
- 35,527
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
28 May 2026
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The hunger is constant: the unspeakable, dark craving for the flickering flame of life inside another person, the urge to take and take until the eyes glaze over and there’s nothing left to burn. Ted’s got a few decades’ worth of practice at keeping a tight lid on it by now. Still, some days are harder than others.
But annoying people into being the best versions of themselves they can be—well, that’s doing them a favor in the long run, ain’t it?
[A What We Do in the Shadows AU. Ted Lasso is the nicest energy vampire you’re ever likely to meet. Promise.]
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
27 May 2026
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Dottie dies, but her secrets can't.
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
25 May 2026
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Gale Dekarios is wasting away.
The only way to combat his mysterious disease is to study it, and the only way to study it is by examining fresh bodies.
One of them is fresher than expected.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 40,505
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 399
- Kudos:
- 326
- Bookmarks:
- 72
- Hits:
- 4,937
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
19 May 2026
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“You bought us gnomish drugs?” Astarion gasped.
It was all slotting together. The wretched truth. His poor, sweet, innocent husband was swindled by a gang of fraudulent artificers. Earnestly seeking something to ease his pain and walking away with an experimental tincture that was—
Suddenly, the strange cat video from earlier seemed much less like a silly internet distraction and much more like an omen. Or perhaps a premonition, lighting the shared future of Astarion and his husband as they hurtled forward together into the terrifying unknown.
Gale makes a miscalculation with his homemade edibles, Astarion experiences the wonders of THC for the first time, and federal tax dollars are wasted.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,044
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 29
- Kudos:
- 51
- Bookmarks:
- 6
- Hits:
- 318
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
19 May 2026
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“I don’t really think there’s a true name for what I am,” Gale admits, looking sheepish, “But I have named it, myself. If that’s interesting to you.”
“Of course I’m interested, Gale, I’m here.” He’s asking.
“I… call it Portentus Castificare. An omen of punishment,” Gale says, eyes on his hands where they rest in his lap.
“Is it that bad?” Astarion cajoles, hoping to earn another smile somehow or other.
“It’s certainly… monstrous. And the hunger, when its yawning void opens within me, is… almost insatiable. And quite painful. This… this body, what you’ve come to recognize as me… it’s a facsimile of the man I was before, as best as I could recreate it. But I died that day, I think. It absorbed me just as I absorbed it,” Gale does smile, but it’s a sad one.
Series
- Part 1 of portentus domesticus
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
17 May 2026
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“He saw me, where Mystra didn’t.”
It’s late now. Astarion sits with Gale beneath the starless night and watches him polish his sword. A slip of the blade draws blood; unfazed, Gale brings his finger to his lips, and tastes it with naked rapture. In the waning moonlight, the rot is more obvious than ever before. It snakes past his waistband, branches over his throat.
Astarion hums softly. “Bhaal?”
A nod. “He saved me.” Gale shuts his eyes. “He talks to me. Listens to me, understands me, believes in me, rewards and respects and adores me.”
A pause. Overhead, the wind is silent.
“He loves me. And in turn, I grant him my devotion.”
In search of a cure for the tadpole in his head, Astarion encounters Bhaal's newest Chosen, and finds himself biting off far more than he can chew.
Bookmarked by vanitashaze
17 May 2026