kcelux



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    Rozanov offers a hand to shake. “A pleasure to meet you.”

    “Likewise,” JJ says evenly as he shakes Rozanov’s god damn hand cordially.

    “Nice to meet you,” Hayden grits out less than politely.

    “Well,” Rozanov drawls, making himself comfortable on one of the loveseats Shane somehow has. He cracks open the single can of Coke. “At least you will not need to hide my body, yes?"

    “You’re on thin ice, Rozanov,” Hayden says gruffly.

    Rozanov ignores him, turning to JJ. “My favourite player is Shane Hollander after all.” He winks, taking a swig of his can.

    They can get along, JJ thinks.

     

    ---

    In which Ilya is still a hockey player and Shane is the nerdy TA who loves loons just a little too much (and hockey, of course).

    Or, 5 times people learn that Shane's boyfriend is Ilya motherfucking Rozanov. And 1 time someone learns that Montreal Jane is actually a man.

    The direct sequel to Shane Hollander: Stupid Canadian Wolf-Bird Expert (and lover boy) but can be read as a standalone!

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    28 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    @rozysgirl: GUYSSJSJAJA I’M BEHIND ILYA ROZANOV IN A GROCERY STORE

    @rozysgirl: Wait I can see his phone

    @rozysgirl: Let me see If I can read it

    @bearlover: Yo girl don't do that wtf

    @livebreathhckey: Get away from him your weirdo

    @rozysgirl: Oh thats not-

    @livebreathhckey: bitch don't start vague posting right now

    @rozysgirl: Okay guys I was being funny and all but I think this is really serious. Doesn't it looks like hes talking to a teenager or something?

    OR

    Conversations between Ilya and Jane are leaked all over the internet. In the course of a few hours, chaos was installed and everyone was conviced Rozanov is dating a minor

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    28 Jun 2026

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    Caitlin
    ok this IS earth shattering news

    Caitlin
    the concept of the worst team in the league getting ilya rozanov because some random girl managed to lock down “russia’s greatest love machine” and have him so whipped that he moves to OTTAWA??

    Caitlin
    like who the fuck is this girl?????

    Cassie
    Literally all I know is that her name is Jane

    Caitlin
    who the fuck are you jane!!!!!!

    (the ottawa wag chat finds out about jane. cue them finding out little bits of jane lore until some things add up)

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    28 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    [Shane fishes around the bowl before pulling out a scrap of paper. He clears his throat and begins to read aloud.]

    Shane: I want Shane Hollander to-

    Shane: [looking up at the camera. His expression is shocked.] Oh my God?

    Shane: [speaking to someone off camera] Are you sure I can say this on camera?

    Harris: [off camera] Yes.

    Shane: Okay.

    Shane: [takes a deep breath].

    Shane: I want Shane Hollander to f*ck me so hard I get sent to A&E.

    Shane: [blushing] Harris are you sure this is appropriate for the team social media?

    Shane: [frowning] Aren’t there any tweets about hockey or something?

    (the centaurs read thirst tweets)

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    27 Jun 2026

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    “Okay,” Ilya says. His thumb restarts its soothing. “Then say it all wrong, and I will understand anyway.”

    So Shane tries, reaches out and hopes for Ilya to reach back. “My first year with the Metros wasn’t… great. I mean, I played great hockey, but those first few years, the room wasn’t…"

    “Room wasn’t great,” Ilya repeats. “What does this mean? Not great like calling you slurs? Not great like hazing?”

    Shane stiffens, then forcibly relaxes. He tries to make his voice light, “A little, uh. A little of both, I guess.”

    OR

    Shane's metric for a normal locker room is skewed. Ilya (and the Centaurs) are happy to help.

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    27 Jun 2026