itsmegeneparmesan
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the bearer of unconditional things by thewalkingexistentialdread
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
18 Jul 2026
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The Department of Mysteries has a room that grants wishes.
According to absolutely no one reputable.
Hermione Granger has no intention of believing ridiculous Ministry gossip. She simply intends to prove that Harry's promotion, Pansy's transfer, Ernie's raise, and her own strangely peaceful office all have perfectly rational explanations.
Unfortunately, the more she investigates, the less interested she becomes in finding one.
Bookmarked by itsmegeneparmesan
19 Jul 2026
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When a newly-spawned kitchen Dementor imprints on Draco Malfoy on both of their first days at Azkaban, it sets off a curious pattern of events never before seen in the dreaded wizard prison. Hermione Granger’s efforts to get to the bottom of the mysterious changes reveal there’s more to magic, and Malfoy, than she thought. With more trouble cooking up than meets the eye, can Hermione get Draco — and herself — out of harm’s way?
The Ratatouille-meets-Halloweentown Dramione you never asked for, and maybe never knew you needed.
COMPLETE!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 65,742
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 745
- Kudos:
- 1,545
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- 703
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- 51,441
Bookmarked by itsmegeneparmesan
20 Jun 2026
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Hermione somehow lands the role of Trip Sitter for Draco Malfoy, who is spiralling after jilting his bride.
Chaos ensues.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,205
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 266
- Kudos:
- 1,435
- Bookmarks:
- 355
- Hits:
- 26,431
Bookmarked by itsmegeneparmesan
19 Jun 2026
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In which Draco is Hogwarts’ triwizard champion, Hermione doesn't need rescuing, and we discover the virtues of hypocrisy.
Bookmarked by itsmegeneparmesan
16 Jun 2026
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The end of Voldemort heralds the signing of the first Wizarding Peace Accord, allowing Purebloods and Wizarding Citizens to co-exist under very strict rules. But the Accord requires more than just optimism to work. It requires the art of diplomacy.
Bookmarked by itsmegeneparmesan
13 Jun 2026