grenade_jumper
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In high school, Stan's mother thinks his old friend Kyle will be a good influence. Kyle doubts it.
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Bookmarked by grenade_jumper
16 Jun 2026
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Stan asked, “What would you say if I told you I got abducted by aliens last night? With Craig, Tweek and Cartman?”
Kyle raised his eyebrows. “I’d say that your wet dreams are getting weirdly specific and you should stop telling me about them.”
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Bookmarked by grenade_jumper
15 Jun 2026
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“I’m, uh… sober,” Tweek announces because what the fuck else is he supposed to say to his ex-boyfriend that he ghosted 10 years ago to go do drugs?
Craig nods slowly. He wants to say congrats, or I’m proud of you, or how have you been sober for this fucking long and not contacted me at all you fucking asshole–
(In which Tweek emerges from his decade long absence from Craig’s life as a sober desert hippie and Craig is just an emotionally stunted mechanic in South Park. They try to figure it out.)
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Bookmarked by grenade_jumper
12 Jun 2026
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“Hah, okay. Think like this.” Stan gestures vaguely. “Teenage years are like a tutorial… but for real life, ‘n time is running out for you. So here’s me, but not me, hot–girl me, asking you on a practice date.”
He watches him for a second, processing the words, then sinks back into bed with a heavy sigh. “It’s too fucking early for this.”
Stan kisses him again, gently, tiredly, and there’s no resistance. He snuggles closer. “C'mon. It’ll be soo fun.”
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“My mom said you aren’t allowed back to the house unless we stay downstairs.” Kyle said in leu of greeting.
Stan looked bewildered before he burst into laughter. “Afraid I’m going to take your innocence?” he asked teasingly.
“You’re the worst,” Kyle said.
Or: Kyle agrees to a fake relationship with Stan, who said his feelings could get involved?
Bookmarked by grenade_jumper
08 Jun 2026