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Assad comes to Eric's hotel room with a script and a secret.
Major spoilers for Season 3, Episode 6 of TVL! You have been warned!
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He did feel bad for the poor kid. He remembered jerking off for a week after he saw The Velvet Vampire in theaters. Assad was worse off now, though, because while there hadn’t been a chance in hell he’d ever get to fuck Celeste Yarnall, Assad had very much been able to fuck one Eric Bogosian, and now he had to do without.
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“But aren’t you ever tempted to like, clamp down? Fully break the skin?”
Assad’s long fingers twitch, fiddle with his pants leg. “I, uh…” His voice is low, just above a whisper. “I have been.”
Eric studies him. He’s flushed, long dark eyelashes demurely downcast.
“Tempted, I mean,” says Assad.
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Will nobody rid me of this troublesome flatmate by Theocelotgamer
Fandoms: Peep Show (TV 2003)
30 Apr 2026
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One of these days, Mark was going to kill him.
I’m going to bash his stupid face in and use a mortar and pestle to mull him to a fine paste, then burn that fine paste and mix the paste ashes into a slurry that I could then drink to enrich myself.
“Anyway, I know you like a free lunch- so really I think this could work out great for both of us.”
Oh god, he’s still talking, I need to just shut him up, just say anything.
“I don’t see why any of this requires me to go with you to this party and pretend to be your boyfriend?”That's right, it's a fake dating fic! Will the scheme get too real? Will Mark get over himself and admit he cares? Or will he kill Jeremy in a well deserved mania of bloodshed. Tune in to find out!
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unrealistic costs and subrealistic expectations by Bismuth_is_Underrated (Yuttis)
Fandoms: Peep Show
18 Dec 2024
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Ian wants to go on a life-changing love-cementing teenage dream trip to Spain.
His father is a tight-wad. -
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Jeremy is in his bed when Mark decides to turn in.
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Mark and Jez slept together. It’s fine, except it’s also not, and Mark doesn’t know if it’s fine or not, or how to deal with it, so he does what he does best; overthinks.
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“When you think about it Mark it's really the most brilliant plan ever! If we get married we get loads of pressies, our old girlfriends will think they've turned us gay, and your parents will be furious. I don't know why we haven't thought of a revenge marriage before now.”
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There comes a time in a man's life when he realizes his longest and most functional relationship has been with his male roommate and that they've lived together longer than the requirements for a common-law marriage so he might as well get the tax advantages.
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Mark and Jeremy get married only to figure out they already were married, but at least they got a new blender out of the whole thing.
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I'm Just a Red Light by BeautyInChains
Fandoms: Interview with the Vampire (TV 2022) RPF
30 Nov 2024
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"Shit," Eric rumbles, releasing Assad to pat down his jacket pockets in search of the source of the obnoxious ringing. Assad runs his tongue over his lips, lapping up all traces of Eric's saliva as Eric pulls his phone from his right pocket. "It's Jo," he says as he glances at the screen, brows furrowed apologetically. Assad hums, noncommittal, brushing a stray curl from his eyes. Eric presses a single finger to his own lips, green eyes imploring. Shhh.
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Julius Hotel, Room No. 446 by trinityofone
Fandoms: Interview with the Vampire (TV 2022) RPF
06 Aug 2024
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"What would happen if I said we actually did that? We didn't shoot [Daniel's turning], but me and Eric decided to play the scene..." —Assad Zaman
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Down every night at 10:15, up every morning at 07:00- coincidentally enough, the same window of time in which Jez is most alive. Not because Mark isn't there, but because he can pretend that he is.
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Jeremy is so normal about that man most people would categorise as 'just okay'.
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"Shit, this must be my rock bottom," thinks a man getting his dick sucked.
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“Oh come on Jez! You remember how pleased Sophie was when we-”
Jez stares at him, expectant and bewildered. “When we…?”Just as Mark still dithers to elaborate, and Jeremy thinks it’s nearing time to put the four-days-stale curry in the microwave, Mark makes a sudden dive for Jeremy’s mouth, lips protruding - like a penguin, only much more slobbery - and Jeremy instantly recoils.
“Mark, you’re not twelve, you can just say ‘snogged’.”
“But it’s such an awful word! It’s like… damp, or wet, or-” he suppresses a shudder, “-moist! Gah!” Realising that he hasn’t quite converted Jeremy to his thought process, Mark gets over himself. “Point is, if that’s how she felt about us kissing, imagine how she’d feel about me…
“Fucking me in the arse?” Jeremy unhelpfully supplies.
“...I was going to say dating.” -
Glenn and Rob Bang at the Emmys by Anonymous
Fandoms: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia RPF
10 Dec 2024
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Exactly what it says on the tin. Glenn and Rob abandon the Emmy Awards ceremony to fuck in the bathroom.
Series
- Part 4 of The Glenn and Rob Banging Saga
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Red Wine Supernova (Fall Right Into Me) by Anonymous
Fandoms: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia RPF, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
16 Apr 2024
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“Dude, you got those chips I like.”
“Duh.” Rob rolls his eyes and turns, but Glenn can tells his cheeks are scrunched up from the curve of his face.
He can almost see the smile. The width of it. The unevenness of Rob's teeth.
(or, a night with glob in the weho hot tub)
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What do you do with a loving feeling (If the loving feeling makes you all alone?) by Anonymous
Fandoms: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia RPF, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
17 May 2024
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Glenn sort of hates this house. Photos of Kaitlin and the kids stare down at him from every wall, but he can’t tell if it’d be worse without them.
(or, rob cheats on his wife.)
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well, that's just teenage talk by orphan_account
Fandoms: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
07 Aug 2022
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“Hey, hey!” Mac calls as he comes around the side of the house, a bounce in his step that means he’s excited about something. Charlie hopes he found some old guy to buy them beer for tonight. Bowling sucks without alcohol, even if you do have a nice high going on. “What’s popping?”
Dennis ashes his cigarette into Dee’s half full can of Coke. She smacks him hard on the arm. “Took you long enough,” he says, all cool, like he hasn’t been whining about Mac’s absence for the last forty minutes. Charlie doesn’t roll his eyes, but it’s a near thing.
“Oh, sorry,” Mac says, crashing into the empty lawn chair, all limb. He snags the cigarette from Dennis’s fingers and sticks it in the corner of his mouth, ignoring Dennis’s ensuing squawk of protest. “I was a little busy getting us invited to Stacey McKenna’s graduation party tonight!”
or.
the gang, in pairs, the summer after high school.
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you're still the boy that i'd pick (in a lineup of 30 hot guys!) by femsl4sh
Fandoms: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
27 Oct 2023
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Mac rakes a hand through his hair, squeezing his eyes shut. This line of thought isn’t helping him get rid of his hard-on right now. Nor is him still standing just outside Dennis’s bedroom. He grinds his teeth over his bottom lip, heart hammering in his chest. He really is sober right now, disappointingly so - there’s no excuse for what he’s considering.
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Dennis needs to boost his self-esteem after being rejected by every modelling agency in Philadelphia.
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talk to me dirty; talk to me sweet by thesweetestdream
Fandoms: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
12 Jul 2026
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Will and Mike accidentally overhear a couple talking dirty over the walkie, and start repeating some of the filthy phrases to each other for shits and giggles. What starts as a joke, soon turns into something they can't stop doing – and can’t tell anyone about.
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Mike and Will start talking dirty to each other for fun. What they don't consider is that it would accidentally turn them on.