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"Listen," Harry said, watching his aunt's best china perform a synchronized swimming routine in midair, "getting your Hogwarts letter at forty isn't the end of the world."
In which Petunia Evans Dursley turns out to be a very, very late bloomer, Vernon's mustache becomes sentient, Dudley thinks this is the best thing that's ever happened, and Harry seriously considers charging tutoring fees.
(Or: What happens when the most aggressively normal woman in Britain has to accept that she's a witch, and her long-suffering wizard nephew has to teach her how to stop accidentally turning her kitchen appliances into a musical ensemble.)
******
I'm posting WIP chapters on my Discord before I post them here. Please give me feedback there!
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
21 Jul 2026
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Aphantasia: the lack of an ability to visualize; those with Aphantasia cannot create images in their head. Around 2 to 3 percent of the world population is estimated to have it, although the true number is assumed to be much higher.
It's not considered a disorder or medical issue, but it can create challenges occasionally.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,229
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 14
- Kudos:
- 327
- Bookmarks:
- 28
- Hits:
- 2,094
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
21 Jul 2026
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Summary
The trumpet of a prophecy! O Wind,
If Winter comes, can Spring be far behind?We are who we make ourselves.
- Words:
- 75,064
- Works:
- 8
- Bookmarks:
- 266
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
16 Jul 2026
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... I would ne’er have striven
As thus with thee in prayer in my sore need.
Oh, lift me as a wave, a leaf, a cloud!
I fall upon the thorns of life! I bleed!The rumblings of war.
Series
- Part 8 of Can Spring Be Far Behind?
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
16 Jul 2026
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Summary
It was a man at the door, and he walked in with an odd mixture of extreme self assurance and that same social fear she'd shown, herself, only a moment ago. His hair was black and stringy, looking clean but not altogether cared for, like parts of it had been burnt or cut away with a blunt knife. His face was young, like hers, but incredibly worn, like he'd been driven to exhaustion a few too many times. The suit he wore was nice, expensive, definitely, but draped over his nearly skeletal form like he'd never even consulted a tailor.
He took off his hat, grey to match his coat, and held it against his chest. "Hey, Hermione, do you mind if I talk to you for a bit? I just need some advice."
Stunned, she gestured an arm, stepping back to allow him into the library proper, instead of just the doorway. "How did you know my name?"
Series
- Part 1 of Skipping Hogwarts
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
03 Jun 2026
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AU. DEATH EATER KIDNAPS BOY WHO LIVED! read the newspaper headlines across magical Britain.
Snape-friendly fic.
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
02 Jun 2026
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When Hermione broke up with Ron (for real, for good, forever) she didn't rage and she didn't yell and she didn't cry.
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
23 May 2026
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The one about betrayal. AU. OOC. One-Shot. Complete.
Series
- Part 1 of So It Has Come To This
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
10 Apr 2026
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The tent once held silence, survival, and the ache of almost-love.
Years later, it’s unfolded again—this time not for hiding, but for remembering, and for asking.
Harry wants to propose.
Kreacher insists it be done properly.The tent, ancient and watchful, prepares to hold them once more.
Series
- Part 3 of Tell Me a Story But True
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,029
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 35
- Kudos:
- 167
- Bookmarks:
- 17
- Hits:
- 1,964
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
11 Mar 2026
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What We Could Be - or, a March 5th Remembrance by Prill_and_Quill
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
07 Mar 2026
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Summary
A child psychologist.
A civil engineer.
A small girl with a purple backpack covered in silver stars.
A Valentine's Day supper, a film neither of them will forget, and a Wednesday evening in early March when someone has to say the thing out loud.
One of them does.
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
10 Mar 2026
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What is the function of a rubber duck? by Skyeholloway
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
31 Aug 2025
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Summary
I feel the title explains it all.
Now with a bonus chapter!
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
18 Feb 2026
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Immediately following second year, Ron Weasley tells Harry a lot of things that he should have known, and they make a plan to get Harry away from the Dursleys. Of course it's the equivalent of a hiding the kitten under the bed sort of plan, but they're twelve. Neither of them expect that one little plan to hide out for the summer will be the pebble that starts an avalanche.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 80,165
- Chapters:
- 22/?
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 650
- Kudos:
- 2,029
- Bookmarks:
- 880
- Hits:
- 74,579
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
07 Feb 2026
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The Light side won the battle but lost the war. By Ministry decree, all Mudbloods have been Obliviated and "repatriated" to the Muggle world. When Draco Malfoy seeks out Hermione Granger, he wants only one thing . . . but gets far more.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 227,936
- Chapters:
- 50/50
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 995
- Kudos:
- 3,036
- Bookmarks:
- 1,483
- Hits:
- 174,298
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
01 Feb 2026
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Summary
A knock on the door of Malfoy Manor, a tentative strike that taps like drumming fingertips.
An unexpected visitor. He slides disdain over his shoulders like his favourite cloak as he traverses stairs and hallways, and the knock echoes again around him, a fingernail scrape against the wood, a whisper of knuckles.
Granger, her curls tempered and tamed under the hood of a cloak, her mouth pinched as she looks at his shoulder, his hand resting on the door, the scars squirmed up from his bones to show on his skin.
“I need somewhere to stay,” she says, and her gaze drags from his fingertips to the end of his nose.
Winner of the "i want to know where you're going" award for the Dragon Heartstring's "dual/ity" flash fest.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,000
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 26
- Kudos:
- 190
- Bookmarks:
- 35
- Hits:
- 1,064
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
30 Jan 2026
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Harry Potter is Totally Just a Normal Student. by Fkndon
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
24 Dec 2024
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Imagine Harry copes well after the war and things go good for him for a while. How will he have a normal student experience (TM) when he has to balance that with a lot of other responsibilities dropped on him?
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
29 Jan 2026
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Summary
At too early o’clock on Saturday morning, when she ought to be sleeping in, especially given the late night she’d had prior, Hermione wakes up to a clattering and a shout from her living room.
“Fucking – why the fuck – Granger!”
Hermione buries her pounding head under the pillows and hopes very much that the man swearing in her living room is just some terrible dream. A nightmare.
Series
- Part 8 of Dramione Month 2024
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,380
- Chapters:
- 3/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 98
- Kudos:
- 579
- Bookmarks:
- 90
- Hits:
- 7,467
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
29 Jan 2026
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Summary
Lavender Brown doesn’t hide with the other Hogwarts ghosts when the students trickle in nervously for their delayed seventh year. She eyes them from behind tapestries, from inside suits of armour, from under wood and rock and cobwebs.
Ron is still tall and handsome and red-haired, but his eyes are red-rimmed and his lips are turned into a frown as though he’s forgotten how to smile. Hermione Granger’s curls have gotten out of control, and Lavender’s hands twitch for her wand. And Harry Potter, all gleam and glasses, stares out across the Great Hall as though he can still see the bodies.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,981
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 19
- Kudos:
- 44
- Bookmarks:
- 6
- Hits:
- 255
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
29 Jan 2026
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the avidity of youth; the naïveté of you by galaxy_skies for jiexhua
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
05 Jan 2025
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Summary
Hermione spends her nights in the deserted library because the ghosts don’t bother her there.
No one died defending books. No one was slaughtered under a table. Blood and ink did not run red and black across the floor.
The rules are bent and broken for the Eighth Years. They do not need to go to bed at a reasonable time; they do not need to attend class; they do not need to hand in homework. She can stay bent over books until the sunrise dapples across the pages; she can stay staring at the unread words until the moon rises once more and the day has wilted away behind her.
She does not have peace, but she has quiet, and sometimes that is enough.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,833
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 20
- Kudos:
- 250
- Bookmarks:
- 51
- Hits:
- 1,661
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
29 Jan 2026
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Karma’s a Witch and Her Name is McGonagall by Witchy_Writer3
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
01 Jan 2025
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Summary
Every witch has a breaking point and a certain transfiguration professor has finally reached hers.
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
25 Jan 2026
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Summary
So what really happened to Hermione, Harry, Ron, and the others after the war?
A series of tales concerning our heroes in both the Muggle and Magical parts of Britain- Words:
- 16,905
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 6
Bookmarked by cotopaxe
24 Jan 2026