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  1. Public Bookmark 94

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    For years, Shane has carried a hollow space inside him, a quiet ache that no amount of distractions could soothe. He’s been starving for a specific kind of gravity, the kind that only Ilya provides. When the undercurrent finally pulls them under, Shane stops fighting and realizes that being held is the only thing that makes the world stop shaking.

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    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,223
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
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    489
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    94
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    25 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “Why are you out here alone?” Ilya asks. “Who left you here?”

    Hesitantly, Shane’s eyes cast up at the apartment building. Ilya follows his gaze, confused.

    “I’m sorry,” Shane says softly, “I went home with someone.”

    Ilya’s head snaps in his direction. “What?”

     

    -an episode 4 au where shane goes home with the bartender instead of rose, and it goes very, very poorly-

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,818
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    272
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    10,504
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    1,930
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    81,975

    16 Mar 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    He was alone because Ilya had left because Ilya always had to leave. [...] He felt horrible. Ilya had left. Maybe Shane hadn’t been good enough? No, he would’ve left anyway. He always left.

    But maybe he would’ve stayed a little longer if Shane had been better? Maybe if he’d been better, used more of those tricks he’d been trying to learn, he wouldn’t have left so soon. Maybe he would’ve wanted to stay like Shane wanted him to stay. Would’ve wanted to hold him like Shane wanted to ask him to do. Maybe Shane wouldn’t be trapped in this cavernous space between worlds, feeling like he was free-falling, searching for the path out of this emptiness.

    OR

    Shane experiences sub-drop for the first time. Ilya holds him through it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,692
    Chapters:
    1/1
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    5
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    155
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    9,923
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    15 Mar 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    It was two rings and then his thick accent and smooth voice washed over Shane like a slow molasses. “Hollander,” Rozanov sighed. “It is late. I thought you had date, no?”

    “I fucked up,” Shane whispered biting back a sob.

    Shane drops after he sleeps with someone that's not Ilya, so naturally he calls Ilya to take care of him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,532
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    314
    Kudos:
    12,444
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    2,132
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    114,520

    07 Mar 2026

  5. Public Bookmark 50

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    As they lay on the bed, movie playing on the laptop in front of them, he can feel Nick's distracted gaze staring at him.

    Charlie gives him a sideways glance.

    "What are you thinking about?"

    "How pretty you'd look sucking my dick." Nick says absently.

    Charlie chokes on his sip of water. Nick sits bolt upright, somehow going both very pale and very red at the same time. Charlie waves off his boyfriend's frantic concern as he coughs and tries desperately not to burst into laughter at the expression on Nick's face.

    "Well that was forward." He teases, once he's caught his breath.

    Nick looks mortified, burying his face in his hands with a groan.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,621
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    178
    Bookmarks:
    50
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    18 May 2025