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Paracelsus’ Theorem of Unknowing by CopperCatbird for Strangemagpie
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
21 Feb 2026
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Summary
“Who let this sociopath play darts!” roared Harry, holding his arm.
“Oh, relax, it’s only a flesh wound,” Draco tutted, taking aim (at the dart board) with his final dart.The Slytherins and Gryffindors have been brought together by romance (Pansy and Ginny), friendship (Hermione and Blaise), and a shared interest in quidditch (Ron and Millicent). Four years in, there are only two holdouts.
Everybody agrees that whatever their problem is, Draco and Harry just need to shag it out.
All that’s left? Convincing them. Luckily, Luna has a solstice ritual to perform, and she needs help.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 45,139
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 110
- Kudos:
- 350
- Bookmarks:
- 113
- Hits:
- 6,366
Bookmarked by axIIa
02 Jul 2026
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“So. How can I help you? Oh, don’t look so stricken; I’m not going to to tell anybody about your sordid little sex games, not that I think anybody cares. Anyway, who'd believe me? For that matter, do you really think my customers would continue to patronise my establishment if I was gabbing about them? Use your brain, Potter; I do know you have one.”
“That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me, I think,” Harry said.
Malfoy crossed his arms. “It’s been six years; I’m out of practice. Now tell me what you need.”
Harry stood there for a moment. He hadn’t really thought this through before he knew that it would be Draco Malfoy he was talking to. He felt utterly unprepared for the conversation.
Fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, his ex-girlfriend was there.
“Harry wants a prostate orgasm and his boyfriends are all terrible,” Ginny said.
Draco’s eyebrows shot up. Harry’s face got hot. Ginny made a face at him and said, “Look, it was going to take you forever to say that.” Then she turned and walked away, leaving Harry alone, with Draco Malfoy, who knew that he wanted to have a prostate orgasm.
Bookmarked by axIIa
02 Jul 2026
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Summary
When Harry sits down with Malfoy, he's really only looking for a reprieve from the constant stares and whispers. (Mostly.) What he gets instead are a series of strange events that lead to a friendship that is something else, questions that nobody knows how to answer, and the realisation that the person that Harry doesn't know how to hate, anymore, seems to be the person who knows exactly what he needs.
A story in which everything is complicated. And yet, somehow, none of it is.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,619
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 556
- Kudos:
- 20,719
- Bookmarks:
- 4,495
- Hits:
- 350,532
Bookmarked by axIIa
02 Jul 2026
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Summary
Worn out, the boys stop at a remote motel to get shelter from a storm.
Series
- Part 1 of Strangers and Angels 'verse
Bookmarked by axIIa
30 Jun 2026
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Sam is fourteen years old and doesn't really need Dean anymore. He tries to restructure their relationship... and does more harm than good.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,327
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 26
- Kudos:
- 323
- Bookmarks:
- 96
- Hits:
- 5,225
Bookmarked by axIIa
30 Jun 2026

