awanderingtortoise
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'Connect to your body,' the VA therapist had told him. 'Plenty of people struggle with this. Look in front of you. Three things you can see, three things you can hear, three things you can--'
What was it? Smell? Well. He digs his head back against his sofa until he feels wood, and sighs.
So.--
(The shape of his early PTSD. character study.) -
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He is staring at her like she is a zebra. "Crush," he echoes. She thinks, not for the first time, that if she wasn't Tamil and melanated to her bones she would have blushed all the way into her toes.
--Little blurb of a hypothetical comedown from 2x07 if they had kissed. because. yk. what if they kissed.
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Scheherazade by awanderingtortoise
Fandoms: The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo, Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo
09 Nov 2025
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Zoya is an up and coming violin soloist, leading the orchestra at one of the most prestigious music conservatories in the world. Her goals aren’t easy, but they’re clear: Study, compete, win, build the name she’s always deserved, always dreamed of. Of course when that cocky bastard of a Juilliard student conductor shows up, all her plans go to absolute shit.
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on even ground by awanderingtortoise
Fandoms: The Odyssey - Homer, Circe - Madeline Miller
07 Nov 2025
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“Goddess,” he rasps. “I require your oath.”
“Traveller,” she breathes the word, bares her teeth in a smile. “Tell me, then. Demigod? Hero?”
“I bleed red as any of my men did.”
She cocks her head, the waves of her dark hair falling onto his shoulder in their proximity. “They did not bleed, yet. Unless, of course, you intend to stay for supper.”
He furthers the blade and she hisses, draws back. “I liked you better on your knees.”Odysseus and Circe, a first encounter. An alternate to Madeline Millers take but in a very similar vein.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,429
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 7
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- 101
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lovesick by awanderingtortoise
Fandoms: Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
25 Jul 2025
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He knows how her skin feels, under his fingers. Or rather he is nearly certain he knows how her skin feels, and the ‘nearly’ of it is driving him to a precarious tap dance on the frayed edge of his sanity.
aka nikolai and zoya come back from the fold and are just as haunted by every what if and should have been as the rest of us and this time they actually DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT
Recent series
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waltz of four left feet by awanderingtortoise
Fandom Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
03 Aug 2023
Summary
“Her romance with Nikolai would never be bouquets of flowers and pretty declarations of love. It lived in the quiet they’d found in each other, in the hours of peace they were stringing together one by one.” -rule of wolves
or: fluff from zoyalais early days: the soft hours of the morning and stolen glances in meetings, snapshots tinted blue and gold, the very first moments of a life that was entirely their own.
- Words:
- 4,444
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 12
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It’s not her fault Captain Jack Abbot likes to flirt with her. He’s on a doomed mission in space. He’s allowed to have a little fun. She’s not flirting back. Mostly.
Bookmarked by awanderingtortoise
02 Apr 2026
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tell me of love, and the many-pathed tomorrow by heardmelodies
Fandoms: Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
09 Aug 2025
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From the moment his cries pierced the air, Nikolai Lantsov was a force of nature.
He would grow to be a prince, a king, and a demon, all in due turn. He would love and lose and love again, his nation, his friends, his body and his mind. He would wear his duty with grace and serve his first love, Ravka, with a smile.
But first he was small, boyish, a child clearly out of place in his surroundings. He knew not what it was to bear the weight of a crown on his brow. He could not understand that no great love waited for him, at least not within his marriage.
He would grow to learn these things, for Nikolai Lantsov was a boy with a future.
(Or: Nikolai Lantsov will not marry for love. That doesn't mean he won't try.)
Bookmarked by awanderingtortoise
27 Nov 2025
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"So what they say is true." His razor tipped smile and quick eyes had not been missed. Yet there he was.
Or, Hermes pays Circe an unexpected visit between their last meeting on Aiaia and her journey to the Underworld.
Bookmarked by awanderingtortoise
07 Nov 2025
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Scott's mind is a Winchester House of false doors and dead ends, deadfalls and secret passages built on and over and through each other.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,664
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 59
- Kudos:
- 834
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- 208
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Bookmarked by awanderingtortoise
06 Oct 2025
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“It is beatable, though, right?” he asks Hank.
Hank raises an eyebrow. “It’s the Kobayashi Maru, Scott. If it were beatable, it wouldn’t be accurate.”
Cyclops vs. the no-win scenario