NoNotTheSinger
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i'd rather be anyone else by StrangeBeautiful for itcouldntbe
Fandoms: The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms
21 Sep 2022
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Summary
“You don’t look at me the way you looked at them,” the words tumbled out before Zelda could cage them in her mouth.
Link nearly dropped his bowl. “What?”
“You know who,” she seethed, red hot anger pouring from a steam valve set to release. “The army of lovers you brought into your bed.”
- Language:
- English
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- 4,182
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- 1/1
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Bookmarked by NoNotTheSinger
17 Jun 2026
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“Did you know the clitoris has over eight thousand nerve endings?” Zoey remarks, her hands sliding up Rumi’s thighs again. “Some studies indicate the number might be over ten thousand, even.”
“I am aware,” Mira deadpans, holding Rumi in place as she squirms and whimpers under Zoey’s ministrations. “I just had my mouth on all of them.”
(OR, touch-starved sexually repressed half-demon attempts self-pleasure, fails miserably. Mira and Zoey reap the rewards)
Bookmarked by NoNotTheSinger
16 Jun 2026
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Not that she had applied for a transfer purely to increase her chances of getting laid, but her time at private university had been pretty stifling in more than a couple of ways. Between not being able to study what she wanted (fashion design and marketing) and her old roommate (homophobic), Mira had found her best option was to piss off her parents (nothing new) and enroll elsewhere for her second year.
In any case, she had just spent all night at the orientation mixer hitting on a girl who turned out to be straight, and now she’s in bed, alone, still a little buzzed from the free beer, convinced that everyone on campus is getting laid tonight except for her.
So. Laptop out, headphones on out of habit, Mira tipsily browses for some porn.
pathetic lonely lovergirl Mira spends several months watching two faceless strangers on the internet having soft, giggly, intimate sex and becomes utterly smitten. what might happen if she coincidentally became friends with them irl? (threesomes. threesomes is what happens) aka the zoerumi camgirl au
- Language:
- English
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- 12,785
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- 2/2
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Bookmarked by NoNotTheSinger
16 Jun 2026
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Is the Goddess still testing him? Has he not suffered enough in this lifetime? Was killing the Calamity not enough—now he has to explain morning wood to the Princess of Hyrule?
(in which Zelda discovers an unsavoury image on the Sheikah Slate and Link must face the consequences)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,326
- Chapters:
- 3/3
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- 3
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- 281
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- 7,505
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Bookmarked by NoNotTheSinger
16 Jun 2026
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Pink Pussy by oatlybrandoatmilk
Fandoms: The Locked Tomb Series | Gideon the Ninth Series - Tamsyn Muir
14 Mar 2023
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Summary
“What’s with the sword theme?” She asks.
“Aiglamene likes swords.” The walls of Scabbards are leaden with them, replicas of swords, pictures of swords, a suit of armor off in a corner holding–you guessed it–a sword.
“So why not call the bar ‘Swords’?”
“Well,” Gideon is only a little delighted that she’s asked this. “Imagine a sword is a dick, then a scabbard must be a–”
“Ah.”
“‘Pussys’ would be too on the nose for a lesbian bar, so Scabbards it is.” Gideon leans forward, hands on the counter and a conspiratorial tone in her voice. “You do know you’re in a lesbian bar, right?”
“Yes, Griddle. I have eyes and critical thinking skills.” Harrow takes another too-big drink.
“I didn’t know nuns went to lesbian bars.” Gideon says, to be a shit.Or: I was just gonna write a fun little thing about Gideon being a bartender and a drummer because I find both of those things attractive, and then 2k of tragic catholic guilt attached itself to Harrow like a revenant, so shit got angsty.
There'll be porn in later chapters, I promise.Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 98,780
- Chapters:
- 22/22
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- 1,310
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- 1,518
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- 314
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Bookmarked by NoNotTheSinger
13 Jun 2026