DontClimbOnThat



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    “Uh,” he says, looking up from his screen and feeling his ears go hot, realizing for the first time that this habit of his hasn’t actually come up before until this exact moment.

    “What?” Rozanov asks, sounding more amused than anything else. “You are one of the people who does Instagram for food now?”

    “No,” Shane says, stalling between answering and finishing his Snap so he can send it to Melissa, “one sec.” He finishes typing out 'Tuna melt. Chips. Pickles. It smells really good. Swiss cheese, I think.' before he looks back to Rozanov, putting his phone facedown on the coffee table. “Just sending it to someone on the staff. She likes knowing what I’m eating.”

    He doesn’t know if Melissa likes knowing what he’s eating, per se, but she also seems pleased when he talks about enjoying food for things beyond how many grams of protein it has in it.

    “Ah,” Rozanov says, in a tone Shane can’t quite read. “You always send her your food then, this girl?”

    (shane has a habit of sending his team's dietician his meals for approval) (the problem with this habit? he forgets to tell ilya exactly what it is that melissa does) (how the tuna meltdown is AVERTED through the power of miscommunication)

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    30 Jun 2026

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    The plane carrying the Voyageurs home from Houston crashes just after take-off.

    Shane is on board.

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    23 Jun 2026

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    Shane Hollander has been eating the same way for eight years. He has a framework. It has a name, research behind it, years of evidence in his performance numbers. He made an appointment because he is a professional, and professionals address things when they become inefficiencies.
    That is what he tells himself. He is very good at this, and ultimately Ilya is wrong. He does not have a problem.

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    22 Jun 2026

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    The second time Shane Hollander wakes up on November 16th, he has a panic attack.

    The problem is — he tries to explain through gasped breaths after Hayden basically knocks down his door, shouting that they’re going to miss their flight — the thing is, Shane’s already woken up on November 16th. He’s already flown to Boston. He’s already been to practice, and he’s checked into the hotel, and he has lived this day before.

    He doesn’t mention that he’s also already fucked Ilya Rozanov twice and had a fucking tuna melt that Rozanov made and drank the ginger ale that Rozanov bought specifically for him. He doesn’t mention that they’d snuggled on the couch watching TV like some kind of couple, like boyfriends.

    He doesn’t mention that he fell asleep thinking about how Ilya — fuck, no, thinking about how Rozanov had called him sweetheart and Shane, and that, even now, he can’t quite get the cadence of Ilya’s voice out of his head.

    Or: After the tuna melt fiasco, Shane Hollander wakes up in a time loop.

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    12 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    The Swiss National League doesn’t care about the legendary Hollander-Rozanov rivalry. When the MLH can’t negotiate with the Hockey Players’ Union in time to prevent a hockey lockout at the start of the 2015 season, the Zürich Lions jump at the chance to sign both Shane and Ilya to short-term contracts. For four months in Switzerland, they share a team, a line, a house, and a bed. 

    Then the lockout ends in January, and it’s time to go back. Back to different countries, cities, lives. Beds.

    Reentry is harder than expected.

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    26 May 2026