CuspOfWank
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“So let me get this straight. I’m currently sitting in your mother’s waiting room because you’ve informed her that we are dating —” Hermione shuddered “— because you are tired of her trying to peacock you around —”
“Peacock me?”
“ — to her friends’ pureblood debutante daughters, and the only way you convinced her you were really dating someone is to say that you are having relationship problems with said person and needed to see your own mother for couples mind healing.”
Malfoy shrugged one shoulder, his arms still crossed over his chest. “Yes.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,887
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 376
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- 2,973
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- 733
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Bookmarked by CuspOfWank
01 Jul 2026
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As she looked around her living room - at the green velvet ottoman she didn't remember purchasing, the 14th century Wizarding texts on her bookshelf, the hideous and obnoxiously ostentatious grandfather clock that could only belong to a Malfoy - she pictured the toothbrush next to hers on her bathroom counter, the old Slytherin quidditch jersey she regularly tripped over in her bedroom, and the mint chocolate chip ice cream in her freezer - a flavour she abhorred, but that a particular, pale, pointy faced aristocrat sat across from her had a tragic fondness for.
Her chest burning, as if she drank a barrel of bubotuber pus, Hermione turned to him with narrowed, accusing eyes. "Malfoy...are we dating?"
If there's one thing Hermione Granger knows, it's that she simply doesn't have time to date. Draco decides to date her, anyway.
Series
- Part 1 of Grandfather Clocks and Ginger Biscuits
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 106,117
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Collections:
- 57
- Comments:
- 1,887
- Kudos:
- 13,744
- Bookmarks:
- 6,175
- Hits:
- 586,842
Bookmarked by CuspOfWank
01 Jul 2026
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‘Where’s my wand?’ he mutters into his knees.
Jameson glances at one of the Aurors who edges his way closer.
‘The Ministry seized it when you—’
‘I want my wand,’ he says, and he sounds…tiny. Like a little boy.
‘Look lad, once you’re in the shelter, you can see about getting your wand back,’ the Auror closest to his side says, the badge at his hip glinting.
‘I can’t go there,’ Malfoy says into his knees. ‘Please. Please don’t make me go there.’ I realise he’s crying. That he’s hiding his face to stop them from seeing. That this is the first time I’ve ever heard him say the word please. That he’s scared. That Draco Malfoy is asking for help.
Something shatters inside me and—
‘He can stay with me.’
Series
- Part 1 of The Letting Go Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 222,066
- Chapters:
- 130/130
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 3,027
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- 4,949
- Bookmarks:
- 2,644
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- 364,343
Bookmarked by CuspOfWank
29 Jun 2026
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Facts are things considered to be known or proven true. Take for example; Draco Malfoy. Prat? Known. Brilliant Potions Professor? Proven true. Annoyingly handsome and capable of using every opportunity he had to get on her nerves? Known and proven true.
When the Headmaster is forced to early retirement due to a family emergency, the position is open to the rest of the faculty. The Minister, Chief Warlock, and the Director for Wizarding Education will be ranking the staff, and the number one professor will be named Headmaster.
She could see it now. Hermione Granger: Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The problem? Draco Malfoy was also vying for the position, if nothing, but to irritate her.
Follow both Professors on their academic journey as they try to sabotage each other while also finding out that they might not be so different after all.Fact: There is a thin line between love and hate.
Explicit spice and the inappropriate use of the potions classroom lay ahead.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 211,349
- Chapters:
- 60/60
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 1,132
- Kudos:
- 1,994
- Bookmarks:
- 1,061
- Hits:
- 139,164
Bookmarked by CuspOfWank
25 Jun 2026
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Summary
Theo cocks his head to the size, studying the Gryffindor. “Draco’s my best friend, you know.”
Hermione freezes as panic wells up inside, threatening to overflow. “And what does that have to do with me?”
“It means I know everything about him. All his secrets.” He leans in and sniffs her hair lightly. “Tell me, is that…vanilla I smell?”Where Theodore Nott meddles and Hermione and Draco almost get caught.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,525
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 21
- Kudos:
- 1,604
- Bookmarks:
- 246
- Hits:
- 25,642
Bookmarked by CuspOfWank
17 Jun 2026