BeepBeepBoop333
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It wasn’t a stirge or a deathfang, Gale choking down a gasp at the humanoid figure madly lapping and guzzling the bowl of blood. It was a vampire.
When Gale becomes aware of a creature targeting the infestation of necrotic rats plaguing his store, his eager brain fixates on the question of what being would willingly consume such pests.
His answer of a feral vampire spawn would only leaves him with an overabundance of academic questions and emotional complications.
Series
- Part 2 of Into The Catverse
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Of Crooked Magistrates and Barmy Wizards by BeepBeepBoop333
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
28 Jun 2026
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Summary
For all his grand dreams of intrigue and adventure when moving to Baldur’s Gate, Astarion Ancunìn, magistrate, is bored.
Stuck as he is, day after day, listening to the whinging confessions of malodorous criminals, ignoring the accompanying paperwork, and ensuring that every so often a particularly guilty individual finds their way into the maw of a local vampire lord, well. It’s hardly any wonder then when a frothing mad, and gently handsome, “former archmage” begins following him about with claims of knowing him that Astarion finds himself enticed despite his better judgement.
Series
- Part 1 of Of Crooked Magistrates and Barmy Wizards
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Never, not in Waterdeep and not here in Baldur’s Gate, had Gale been in possession of many friends. Or any friends, if he was honest. Friendly acquaintances, of course, the ones that Mystra would allow him, and then the coworkers at the grocery store he’d worked at before the library. But he’d never been able to say he had someone eager to spend time together with him, for no purpose but his company.
If everyone knows they’re dating, if they both know they’re dating, then why should Astarion ever have to say that they’re dating?
Or, in which Gale’s pining is no where near as hopeless as his ability to read social cues or Astarion’s ability to communicate.
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“Are you well?” The being was speaking to Astar-ic-n7, an unfamiliar sort of quiet to its voice.
Turning to inspect it, Astar-ic-n7 gazed at the way the skin of its face creased as its mouth upturned without bared teeth, dark eyes liquid in a manner Astar-ic-n7 had never seen before. Those eyes were almost prey-like.
Fleeing from the cruel Empire of Szarr, Astar-ic-n7 (A Star Faring Incubator, Number 7 on their ship) lands on the strange planet of Toril and encounters its even stranger inhabitants. One of which, Gale Dekarios, seems destined to bear their eggs.Series
- Part 1 of Through The Rainbow Ocean to You
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“You seemed to be enjoying your lunch break, listening to your tunes, so I assumed you’d prefer to be left alone.” And I’ve already made enough of a fool of myself, he includes internally.
With the afterimage of Gale licking his lips blinding him, Astarion can’t catch his graceless snort. “Perhaps you’d have a point with any other of the awful creatures that work here, but you needn’t stay away.”
Recent series
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Of Crooked Magistrates and Barmy Wizards by BeepBeepBoop333
Fandom Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
28 Jun 2026
- Words:
- 19,278
- Works:
- 1
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- Words:
- 9,944
- Works:
- 1
- Bookmarks:
- 1
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Summary
Credit to Seas_and_Stars for the amazing name 🩷
In an endless multiverse, there are innumerable timelines in which our Bloodweave idiots are born cats, turned into cats, or think like cats. Here we seek to document these worlds.
Was I joking at first about tons of cat AUs? Yes.
Am I joking now?
Still yesNo.- Words:
- 136,547
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 3
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- Words:
- 184,415
- Works:
- 1
- Bookmarks:
- 5
Recent bookmarks
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If You Give a Vampire a Drink by Akira_of_the_fae
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games), Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game), Ravenloft (Roleplaying Game)
06 Jul 2026
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“Opal, where are you going?”
“To Faerûn! I finally got the ok to travel to other realms and there happens to be an empty vampire castle I wish to have a bit of chaos in!”
At least the palace was supposed to be empty, it was a year after the Absolute crisis after all.
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“Not now Astarion! I want to have a little more fun exploring!” Opallyna complained as she struggled to escape the vampire's grip.
“You know who I am? And why should I allow a little pixy to cause mischief around my palace?” His eyes widened with shock then glimmered amusement, just who was this little pixie playing around his house?
Fuck… His palace? Then that means… Opallyna felt a chill run up her spine as the vampire gazed down at her in his hand, his crimson eyes shining with greed.
There tends to be one rule transmigrators have and Opallyna had just broken it, Lord Astarion wasn't a group of pixels on a screen anymore. How was she going to get out of this? She had assumed Astarion was persuaded away from the ritual and was off traveling with Tav living his best life, little too late did she realize the opposite was true.
Series
- Part 5 of A+ Astarion being a Smoothbrain Lover
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“That's rather enough—” the voice in the stone snapped, and then cut itself off, as though it had suddenly realized something. “You’re a wizard, aren’t you?”
After the nautiloid crash, Rolan pulls Gale out of the ancient rune circle.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,312
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 8
- Kudos:
- 53
- Bookmarks:
- 9
- Hits:
- 253
Bookmarked by BeepBeepBoop333
14 May 2026
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Summary
Astarion was replanting weeds at midnight. His fiancé was sucking up to a childhood bully. The engagement party was in four days. Nothing was wrong. ...Except for the things that were. Starting with why he's more devastated by a pile of uprooted garden weeds than he ever was about killing people.
Or: Two idiots in love navigate polite society, academic bureaucracy, and their own insecurities to figure out what kind of life they actually want together.
Written for the BG3 Month of May Community Event Bring May Flowers 2026: Week 1 – In Bloom. “Weeds” keyword.
This is a sequel to Blind Spots but can be read as a standalone. Plausibly post-canon compliant, with some made-up magic and bending of 5e spellcasting rules.Series
- Part 2 of Shifting Perspectives
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,906
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 45
- Kudos:
- 57
- Bookmarks:
- 13
- Hits:
- 616
Bookmarked by BeepBeepBoop333
03 May 2026
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Summary
Astarion's team at The Final Scribe Entertainment has been working on Project Tadpole for two years. When Old Man Withers decides that "two months before the official alpha reveal" is the best time to hire a historical accuracy consultant for the game, tensions arise—and for good reason. But then Professor Dekarios arrives for his first day at the office, and Astarion realizes he may need to revise his plans for the future.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,731
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 5
- Kudos:
- 17
- Bookmarks:
- 7
- Hits:
- 228
Bookmarked by BeepBeepBoop333
03 May 2026
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Summary
Like most of Gale’s problems since the Nautiloid, this whole mess is Tav’s fault. He doesn’t know exactly what Tav told Astarion when Gale was out of the room, but he trusts that they didn’t betray his confidence. Probably.
Whatever it is has made Astarion act even stranger than normal and it is threatening Gale’s very carefully curated compartmentalization of his feelings for the man.
Bookmarked by BeepBeepBoop333
02 May 2026