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Eventually when it seemed like he had gained at least some control over his emotions, Greg answered, “of course I’m not fucking straight, are you blind?”
“Oh…” Alex replied.
“We’ve kissed, Alex, more than once, and not just on the show. We’ve shared a bed. I woke up one morning with you half on top of me. What did you think was happening all those times?”
Alex’s eyes were huge and getting larger by the second. “I thought you were just being friendly… I…” Alex’s voice tailed off in the face of Greg’s increasing ire.
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When struggling comedian Alex Horne decides he needs an additional source of income besides open mic gigs, he thinks he’s finally found the perfect job where he can make some money to get him his dreamed-of show at Edinburgh while still having enough time to work on his comedy.
The role is perfect, except for one thing.
The man from the pub across the street.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 40,804
- Chapters:
- 11/18
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 183
- Kudos:
- 238
- Bookmarks:
- 34
- Hits:
- 5,335
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Heart and Soul by Vamillepudding
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, No More Jockeys (Web Series) RPF
28 Oct 2025
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Summary
“Now,” Greg purrs, stepping over the remnants of the salt and in the direction of Alex, who’s still watching him with big, guileless eyes, “for the record, I do have a heart, but I haven’t got a heartbeat. Any last words?”
“A few.” And then, without even glancing at the book, Alex loudly starts chanting, “Exorcizo te, immundíssime spíritus-“
“For fuck’s sake,” Greg says, for the second time tonight.
Or: After Greg is summoned and then unceremoniously sent back to Hell without striking a deal, all he can think about is how he's going to see the upstart little witch again so he can
ask him outeat his heart.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,745
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 68
- Kudos:
- 203
- Bookmarks:
- 29
- Hits:
- 1,421
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Key, Horne & Watson Florist by MadameQuagmire
Fandoms: No More Jockeys (Web Series) RPF, Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF
01 Feb 2022
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Three idiots run a well-loved neighborhood flower shop. They've managed to refrain from killing each other for years, until Tim starts writing poems for one of their regular customers.
Series
- Part 1 of Taskmarkets Trilogy
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Bookmark Notes:
so incredibly wholesome and sweet 🥹🥹🥹
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Lost in the Supermarket by exboyscout
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, British Comedy RPF
27 May 2026
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“It’s retail, mate. I’m not expecting perfection from some twenty-something dairy stocker. I know it’s not your passion—hell, it’s not mine either. It’s nobody’s, really, is it? You’d have to be properly mad, maybe even a bit masochistic, to actually enjoy it.”
Alex swallows, because he sometimes worries that he could very well be both of those things.
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8
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(For the Taskhusbands Bingo prompt: fell into a parallel universe)
In 2001, Alex Horne is freshly dumped, drunk and just trying to get back to his college rooms when he trips and falls through time. In 2025, Greg Davies is on tour, lonely, and just trying to get back to his hotel, when he stumbles upon a much, much, younger version of his friend and co-host. Together they try to find a path home for Alex.
Update: now with FANTASTIC ART - end of chapter 2
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,870
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 174
- Kudos:
- 199
- Bookmarks:
- 21
- Hits:
- 2,417
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"So, what, I'm supposed to drive to Cambridge and knock on his office door and– what?"
Rhod shrugged. "And punch him in his smug face, if you like," he said. "Or maybe just have a chat. Up to you, really."
Just like that. As if it was the easiest thing in the world.
Series
- Part 143 of Taskmaster Collection
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,974
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 22
- Kudos:
- 80
- Bookmarks:
- 5
- Hits:
- 562
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Not a Bad Beginning (By Far the Best Ending) by Vamillepudding
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, No More Jockeys (Web Series) RPF
17 Jul 2025
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Greg is getting irritated again. “I know I’m not one of Alex’s fifty closest friends, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care."
“Did he tell you that?” Tim asks. "That you’re not one of his five hundred closest friends or whatever?"
“I said fifty,” Greg says. “Now I’m thinking it’s five hundred and I feel even worse.”
*
Or: Tim has known Alex for two decades and knows him better than anyone, and still thinks he would rather die than hear Alex say something nice about him.
Greg has known Alex for almost one decade now, but he still sometimes feel like he doesn't know him at all.
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These Things Take Time by exboyscout
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, British Comedy RPF
28 Jun 2025
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Summary
Alex and Greg share a dressing room at the 2010 Edinburgh Fringe.
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Christmas in Taskerville by Illuminescence for jmurph773
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF
21 Jun 2024
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New York Times bestselling romantasy, "Masked Fall" is headed for the big screen, and heart-throb leading man, Greg Davies, will play its bisexual protagonist. But when an aggressive interviewer asks just the wrong question, Greg says something he didn't mean to - and flees the ensuing media shit-storm to the tiny village of Taskerville.
Hiding behind a fake name, Greg meets a colourful cast of village characters - but none more-so than the gap-toothed, shabbily dressed Alex Horne, who rescues Greg from mishaps and misadventures. The influencers are circling, and Christmas is coming - will Greg keep hiding, or will he find a reason to throw off the mask and step into the light?“Thank you so much for taking the time to chat with us today about your upcoming film, Mr Davies! I know it’s very early in—”
“—Oh, fuck! Please, Tim, for a hundred and one reasons, call me Greg. I left Mr. Davies back in the classroom!”- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 54,569
- Chapters:
- 21/21
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 260
- Kudos:
- 134
- Bookmarks:
- 16
- Hits:
- 2,657
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Sweet Young Prince by Anonymous for stillproperverse
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, No More Jockeys (Web Series) RPF
26 May 2026
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Summary
Bambi AU.
Greg laughed again. “I know who you are, young prince,” he said, and for some reason, the title sounded more like a teasing insult from his mouth. “Little Alex no Horns, as it were.”
Before he could stop himself, Alex let out a hum of disapproval. “Antlers,” he corrected, and Greg blinked at him.
“Pardon?”
“It’d be Little Alex no Antlers, surely.”
Series
- Part 142 of Taskmaster Collection
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,075
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 23
- Kudos:
- 49
- Bookmarks:
- 4
- Hits:
- 383
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The Mistletoe Incident by teatimeready
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, British Actor RPF, British Comedy RPF
30 Dec 2025
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Summary
"I can practically hear you thinking," Greg murmurs after a while. "Everything okay?"
Y/n turns on her side to face him, though in the dimness she can only make out the outline of his profile. "Just... processing today, I guess."
"Ah," Greg says. "You mean the mistletoe incident?"*Chapter two now added!*
Series
- Part 14 of Taskmaster Short Stories
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Summary
One Year, Two Men, Three Rules, One Secret to Discover.
Or, in anticipation of Taskmaster's 10th anniversary, Alex takes on a secret task for himself, and gets far more than he bargained for.
Series
- Part 116 of Taskmaster Collection
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 55,914
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 398
- Kudos:
- 289
- Bookmarks:
- 28
- Hits:
- 5,899
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Bookmark Notes:
So fucking good. Really good shit. Just the right amount of pining and slow-burn
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Summary
Despite Alex's job as a handler, his day-to-day is mostly nothing too exciting... that is until he gets assigned a new agent: the fabled Taskmaster.
Just a silly little Handler/Secret agent AU
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,331
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 26
- Kudos:
- 218
- Bookmarks:
- 36
- Hits:
- 1,947
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Bookmark Notes:
fantastic fic, interesting and compelling the whole way through – i could barely bear to put my phone down to do basic human activities !! this is just really really good idk what else to say
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Summary
Alex Horne: a longitudinal study.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,184
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 24
- Kudos:
- 280
- Bookmarks:
- 43
- Hits:
- 3,630
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two flints by dizmo, sabinelagrande
Fandom Oxventure (Web Series), Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF
18 May 2022
Summary
It takes two flints to make a fire.
Which isn't actually true, but it's more important to be convincing than tell the truth.
- Words:
- 73,363
- Works:
- 17
- Bookmarks:
- 35
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Summary
Alex has been presented with a fun night of risky business on the high seas.
That's not not what happens.
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Bookmark Notes:
Die waarin iemand anders zegt dat Alex idd transvibes afgeeft irl
"You want me to stay?" Greg asks.
"Yes, I'd like that very much," Alex says bashfully.
Greg looks a little like he's hooked a fish, but Alex doesn't mind getting caught. "Do you want to talk, or do you want to tell me what you're into?"
"It seems awfully early," Alex says, and Greg looks confused. "Um, I meant, if we were to-" He waves a hand- "Now, then we'd already be done by ten."
"Mate-" Greg starts.
"Alex," Alex says.
Greg's face softens somehow. "Alex, if we were to, now, I would consider it a professional failure if we were done by ten."
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More or Less by Anonymous
Fandoms: Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF, British Comedy RPF, No More Jockeys (Web Series) RPF
23 Jan 2024
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Summary
Greg cleared his throat. “Can I, er, get you anything?” he offered.
Alex shook his head. “No, thank you.”
“Right,” Greg said, shifting awkwardly before clearing his throat. “Well, I’d offer you an explanation, but I think that’s what you’re here for.”
“Oh, right,” Alex said, his blush deepening, and he fiddled with the cuffs of his jumper, dressed far too warmly as always for the beginning of September. “You didn’t come to my party.”
Series
- Part 7 of Taskmaster Collection
- Part 1 of Alex's Birthdays
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,405
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 18
- Kudos:
- 235
- Bookmarks:
- 17
- Hits:
- 2,143
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Work/Series Details
More or Less by Anonymous
Published: 2024-01-23
Work/Series ID: 53246968Relationship Tags:
Additional Tags:
Developing Relationship, Birthday, Hijinks & Shenanigans, horrible friends, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Polyamory
Work/Series Summary:
Greg cleared his throat. “Can I, er, get you anything?” he offered.
Alex shook his head. “No, thank you.”
“Right,” Greg said, shifting awkwardly before clearing his throat. “Well, I’d offer you an explanation, but I think that’s what you’re here for.”
“Oh, right,” Alex said, his blush deepening, and he fiddled with the cuffs of his jumper, dressed far too warmly as always for the beginning of September. “You didn’t come to my party.”
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Greg thinks he's not sexually attracted to Alex but is he lying to himself?
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Bookmark Notes:
:D
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[edit 6/18/23: Animation added to chapter 22] A sci-fi space fic where Greg is a spaceship, and Alex is an escaped, drug-chemist, slave. They have a bad time, finding comfort in each other.
After decades of indentured servitude on Al Murray’s private moon, Alex has made a break for it – scrambling through a junkyard in a desperate bid for freedom. He’s terrified, bleeding, and fears a laser blast in his back at any moment, but he would never in a million years expect to literally stumble upon a half-junked spaceship from the war in need of a name, a purpose, and most of all, a friend.
He reaches out his hand, and carefully wipes away years and years of dust from the cold metal surface – feeling the engraving rippling on his fingertips. The plaque reads “Geran Republic 3Ө, Stellar Monitor Warship” There’s a date too – which seems to be the commission date – forty-three years ago.
“Can I call you Greg?”-
Bookmark Notes:
weirdest au ive ever read and somehow works so well???? including the school of good and evil house md fusion 🩷🩷🩷
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