Tonight is the night you take back your life
9-1-1 breakdown and suicidal thoughts/attempts collection. Proceed with caution and know your limits. No completed attempts in this collection.
On average, there were 17.6 veteran suicides per day.
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Summary
Buck weaves his way into Eddie and Christopher’s life in the easy way that he’s always had about him. He’s at therapy sessions and dentist appointments, at the grocery store, and the empty side of Eddie’s bed when the nightmares tear him from sleep.
He’s everywhere, always; stitching Eddie back together, making something whole out of them.
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There’s too much heat. The flames crackle and curl in the busted windows. The house is only two stories high. If Buck would listen, if he’d turn around and get out – he could be at the door, he could be out of the fucking blast radius.
But Buck’s still standing in it.
Eddie is cursed.
Like he has been for years.
Eddie is the blast radius.
OR
Eddie Diaz is cursed.
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“You don’t have to,” Buck says quickly. “You could just leave it. Don’t look.”
Eddie glances up at him, and they both know without saying it that he isn’t going to let this go.
There’s no way he can look away now, not after seeing the way Buck reacted.
“Or maybe just not now,” Buck says softly, stepping closer, his hand settling gently over the screen like he can shield Eddie from what’s on it. “Maybe leave it for now. You’re not… Eddie, you’re not doing well right now. I’ve been so worried about you and this—” his voice catches, “—you… Eddie, please don’t. Just leave it.”
It stings to hear the worry out loud, even if he knew it was there.
He wants to do what Buck says, he wants to trust his friend and give him what he’s asking.
Buck never asks for anything.
Eddie moves Buck’s hand aside gently, giving it a brief squeeze. “Can’t do that, Buck.”
Or; After Christopher leaves for El Paso, Buck decides that he and Eddie should trace their family trees to keep Eddie’s mind occupied elsewhere. The results lead Eddie to face a family secret.
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"Let me out! Both of you just fuck off and leave me alone, I'm not going anywhere with you!"
"Hey!" His Abuelo cut in, quickly growing angry at his choice of words. "Do not use that language with me."
"You're fucking kidnapping me."
Or: Disgusted by their son's choice of partners, Helena and Ramon Diaz forcefully take Christopher to El Paso in the name of 'saving him' from their influence. Eddie and Buck do not handle their son's sudden disappearance well at all.
(can be read as a standalone)
Series
- Part 2 of Family line 'verse
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“I don’t–” Eddie’s voice cracked. “I don’t deserve this.”
“I agree. You don’t deserve to feel this way.”
“You know that’s not what I meant.”
Buck’s jaw tightened, and he stood up. “What do you want me to do, Eddie? Stop checking in with you? Stop helping you?”
“Yes,” Eddie said, but Buck continued.
“Wait until I get a call from your son that you locked yourself in your room and took a bat to everything you own?”
Eddie pushed away his plate. “Get out.”
Buck blinked. “Are you fucking serious right now?”
“I’m not kidding, Buck. Get. Out.”
Buck stared at him for a long moment, then turned around and stalked away.
“Fine. But don’t fucking call when you need me.”
or: Eddie navigates his newfound sexuality, and nearly destroys his most important friendship in the process.
Series
- Part 1 of white horse
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Summary
“But why me?” Eddie asks.
“Everyone needs a nudge in the right direction now and then,” says Francis. “You… you need a firmer hand right now.”Eddie is dreading spending Easter in El Paso with his family, but after the events of last summer, he feels he has no choice. When he’s able to convince Buck to come along last minute he’s thrilled, but Eddie soon discovers he’s in for far more than he expected, including some divine intervention.
Or (spoilers): Eddie Diaz is such a hot mess express that literal Catholic saints have to start appearing to him to kick his ass in gear.
Set during spring 2025, almost one year after Chris spends the summer with his grandparents.