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Excellent Language Skills by everydayistuesday for blue_eyed_cutiepatootie
Fandoms: Supernatural
04 Mar 2022
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There are raccoons in Dean’s attic. He’s perfectly happy to call an exterminator to take care of the beasts and be done with them. Cas has other plans.
Or, the one where Dean has a slight fear of raccoons and his husband reveals himself to be a Disney Princess.
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“Okay, so, the gay thing,” Dean says.
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All Dean wants is a little privacy. Cas doesn't understand.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 94,118
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 4,685
- Kudos:
- 24,446
- Bookmarks:
- 6,141
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- 606,175
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Insanity, a back alley, and silliness. Insert your own Marquess of Queensbury rules joke here.
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"You can't spend the rest of your life crying. It annoys people in the movies." - Neil Simon's The Odd Couple. An angst-free look at life after Journey's End.
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When she is in Paris, she sleeps in the catacombs.
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Better the devil you know. Rose and the Doctor after Journey's End.
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My Big Fat British Pregnancy (by Leopold Fitz) by notapepper for badscienceshenanigans
Fandoms: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
25 Jun 2015
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A baby? A tiny, squishy, responsibility-inducing, no-returns-policy, die-if-you-leave-them-alone baby?
He looked at his wife, their eyes widening simultaneously in terror. "Oh, shit."Simmons' pregnancy from Fitz's perspective, told in snippets over forty weeks.
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her lips are sweet surprise by notapepper for memorizingthedigitsofpi, SuburbanSun
Fandoms: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
08 Aug 2017
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He resolutely ignored the blood rushing to his face, among other areas, and surreptitiously scanned the lab to make sure no one was around to see his little probl— no, wait, not little. His average-sized-or-larger problem.
Series
- Part 1 of Fitzsinners
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Overachiever Jemma Simmons is not used to failure. When she can’t retain the attention of dreamy college boy Milton Waters, she blames it on her lack of sexual experience and resolves to learn everything there is to know about sex by the end of summer, before she leaves for college. She can count on her friends Daisy and Bobbi for moral support, and on her mean girl step-sister Raina for reluctant guidance. As for experimenting –surely her good friend and lab partner Fitz would be willing to help?
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Prompt: the first words your soulmate will say to you are written on your skin, but Fitz won’t talk to Jemma
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,555
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 42
- Kudos:
- 398
- Bookmarks:
- 62
- Hits:
- 4,710
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There's a haunted apartment building in Vermont, and the ad says "Professional couple only". Dean and Cas rise to the occasion.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,153
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 859
- Kudos:
- 19,872
- Bookmarks:
- 4,357
- Hits:
- 261,583
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A high-stakes game of ‘gay chicken’ and the easiest $300 Cas thinks he’ll ever make.
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“I bet that you couldn’t go around letting people think we were a couple without correcting them,” Cas says, grinning. "I bet you a hundred dollars that you couldn’t last two weeks."
“You know what, screw it, I could do with a laugh,” Dean says. "So what, we pretend to be a couple for two weeks or until one of us cracks?"
“Until you crack.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,973
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 270
- Kudos:
- 4,307
- Bookmarks:
- 786
- Hits:
- 36,024
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Yes, the touching first words that Castiel’s soulmate will ever speak to him are:
Motherfucking son of a goddamn whore.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,441
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 113
- Kudos:
- 5,475
- Bookmarks:
- 578
- Hits:
- 31,557
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- Words:
- 14,198
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 323
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There's something going on with Cas. Dean is determined to help him through it, in whatever way he can.
He might end up with more than he bargained for.
OR: Dean helps Cas scratch an itch. As it were.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,153
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 765
- Kudos:
- 16,276
- Bookmarks:
- 2,992
- Hits:
- 192,257
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All titles taken from Toby Keith's "Bullets in the Gun," because ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- Words:
- 12,533
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 161
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- Words:
- 42,377
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 229
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Now that Chuck is gone and Cas is back, they can finally just live their lives. Dean is still trying to figure out what that means for him and if he can trust Cas to stay this time. He’s also trying to figure out where Cas is getting the random assortment of objects he keeps pulling out of his sleeve. He always seems to have exactly what Dean needs. Or maybe the truth is that Cas is exactly what Dean needs.
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Cas flicks his hand in a motion that Dean finds familiar, the same one that always produces his angel blade. But instead of the silvery-white gleam of his signature weapon, a little book of matches falls into his palm. He hands it off to Dean. It’s from a strip club in St. Louis, judging by the mirrored silhouettes of two curvaceous women and the address printed on it.
“Got something to tell me?” Dean chuckles.
“Yes. I agree you’re getting too old for digging up graves. Although I assume you were asking where I got the matches. I’m not going to tell you.”
Dean gapes at him. “What? Why?”
“Because the expression on your face is hilarious,” Cas says, and saunters off toward the car.
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Sam's been through a lot lately, what with tonight's hunt rendering his skin an aching shade of purple and all. He can deal with Dean being overly concerned about Cas' broken finger, and - God help him - he puts up with the sound of their preposterously soppy love confessions and first kisses on the adjacent bed. But he cannot be expected to remain silent and feign sleep throughout the entire duration of their first-ever lovemaking session. He just can't. Especially not, because it seems apparent that Cas is more intent on deflowering himself than letting Dean do it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,405
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 231
- Kudos:
- 5,852
- Bookmarks:
- 1,072
- Hits:
- 86,830
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