Chapter Text
“CONGRATULATIONS!!
You have won an exclusive ticket to be on the first sailing of the brand new S.S. Melna! In this exciting cruise ship, several amenities are available, from free food to spa rooms to even a concert stage where your favorite bands can play! You are one of the 16 people who has been randomly selected to be a part of this luxury cruise. How do you board? It’s easy! Just go to [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] and fill out the consent form and you’ll be good to go! We at the S.S. Melna team hope to see you there!
-Sincerely,
S.S. Melna Team”
…
…
…
That day…
It was supposed to be like any other.
But the world had different plans.
~
I couldn’t help but stare at my invitation, dumbfounded. Me? Going on a luxury cruise ship? No way. Not in a quintillion years. Yet here I was. Invitation in hand, lost in my own thoughts.
“Yo, Ringo! ★”
A familiar voice took me out of my trance. It was Maguro Sasaki, one of my childhood friends and a member of the Physics Club along with me and its president, Risukuma, who just so happened to be my senior. Maguro and I have been friends for as long as I can remember, and he knows me so well that it’s kinda uncanny. But hey, friends stick together, right?
“Hey there! ★” He said, looking as laid-back as ever. “You look a little out of it today. You good? Did you pull another all-nighter? ★” I laughed to myself. “Nope, that’s not it. I was just thinking about this letter I got in the mail.” I explained. I showed it to him, and he (somehow, considering how his bangs are constantly covering his face) read the whole invitation with interest.
“Oooh, I’m jealous! ★” He beamed. “Ringo? The ordinary student? Going on an exclusive cruise? Man, I wish that were me! ★” I smiled, a bit embarrassed at the attention. “Oh, come on, Maguro.” I said. “It’s not like they purposefully chose me. I was chosen by random.”
“That still makes you pretty special. ★” Maguro said. “You gotta be seriously lucky to land a ticket like this, considering how big of a city Suzuran is. ★” He got me there, admittedly. “Well, I guess that means that I can’t be a part of the Physics Club until… uh… Actually, I don’t know when the cruise ends. It doesn’t say, and I searched online for details but nothing came up.” I acknowledged. “That means it’s super secret. ★” Maguro joked. “Only you and the 15 other people invited know about this! Don’t tell me that isn’t cool, ‘cause it totally is. ★” I guess that was true. Suspicious, but true.
“Yeah… anyway, since Risukuma isn’t here right now, could you do me a favor and tell him when you see him again that I might be gone for a while? I don’t wanna freak him out by just suddenly leaving.” I asked. Maguro nodded, and said with a grin on his face, “Don’t worry, Ringo. Me and Risukuma will take care of the Physics Club. You just get out there and have fun! ★”
I smiled back, saying, “Thanks, Maguro.”
~
Oh right, I forgot to introduce myself.
My name is Ringo Ando, but everyone calls me just Ringo. I’m a middle schooler at Suzuran High, where I’m a part of the Physics Club. My life USED to be normal, but that all changed one day when a mysterious vortex appeared in my world, causing these weird blobby things called “Puyo” to rain down. To this day, I still don’t fully understand them, but I’ve come to learn that when everything seems bizarre and makes absolutely zero sense, you just have to run with it.
Long story short, me and two other girls from other universes managed to seal the vortex, ending the rain of Puyo. However, with that, there’s now a chance that I’ll get randomly teleported to one of the two girls’ universes just doing ANYTHING. It’s annoying every time, and there’s always an extremely elaborate plan to get me back to my world, but I can’t deny that a lot of my best memories have come from incidents like those.
Anyway, as you probably know, I got selected for a special cruise ship that was sailing for the first time. It’s called the “S.S. Melna”, and there’s zero results for it when I look it up, so I suppose I must be lucky that I get to be on it for its first voyage. I’m just hoping it’s not a Titanic situation where they hype it up as this indestructible ship only for it to sink a few hours later by crashing into a rock or something.
Apparently I’m supposed to fill out some kind of “consent form” that will let me on the ship. The invitation said it was at some obscure location I’ve never heard of in my life, yet somehow I managed to get there. It was an underground office, right in the middle of a completely empty parking lot. Kinda scary, but I gotta do what I gotta do. I walked over to the office, and when I opened the door, the office was also completely empty! Now things were getting weird.
Since there wasn’t anybody at the front desk, I naturally assumed that whoever was in charge of this office was busy doing something else. Talking to another invited person, maybe? Whatever the reason was, I figured they might be back soon, so I sat down in the waiting room. The room itself was kinda barebones, with a few magazines that looked to be about boating and a mini TV that didn’t work. But I might as well get comfy.
I kept waiting and waiting for whoever was in charge of this office, but… nobody came. The office was silent, aside from me singing to myself. I waited longer and longer and longer, so long it felt like hours, and… nobody came. I couldn’t just stay here forever, though. I have to get back home. I decided then that I’d probably have to come back tomorrow, which worked out for me since tomorrow was a Saturday and I didn’t have any school. But as soon as I was about to get up…
My eyes grew heavy.
It was like I was being lulled to sleep, but I felt… worse, somehow. Everything felt dizzy, and it felt like something was stabbing me through the head. Had I gotten a migraine or something? Whatever it was, I was in a lot of pain. It was the worst headache I ever had, so bad that I couldn’t find it within myself to get up. I had to, though. It was getting late. I’ll just come tomorrow.
I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow. I’ll just come tomorrow.
I’ll just…
come…
tomorrow…
…
No matter how many times I repeated that thought in my head, I still felt faint.
I don’t know when it happened, but after a while, everything went black.
…
…
…
~
…
…
…
“…Mmmmmgh…”
Ow. Pain. Everything hurts. Ow. Ow. Ow.
It looked like my headache was still going on, but it was slowly going away. I must have fainted from the pain. Goes to show how much pain tolerance I have. Against my better judgement telling me to sit down and take it easy until I felt better, I forced myself to open my eyes.
What I saw was pure darkness.
Again.
My first thought was that the office had closed for the day with me in it, but when my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I could make out a few outlines of things that looked like furniture. And not the cheap black chairs that they had in the waiting room, but… actual chairs. Something that looked like a sofa. Was that a bed in the corner?
Something was up.
Slowly, so I didn’t overexert myself and bring back my headache, I got up, using the back of the wall as support. I had no idea where I was anymore, only that I was somewhere suspicious… and dark. Of course, common sense declares that “when the light is running low, and the shadows start to grow, use a freaking flashlight already”, so I decided to look around for a light switch of some kind. After a while of running my hand against the wall, I felt a weird bump that reminded me of a button. Naturally, I pushed it, and…
VRRRRRRRRRR.
The lights slowly turned on, illuminating the whole room with light. I think my headache got worse.
Once I finished rubbing my eyes (and wishing that I brung some medicine with me), I took another look at the room, now lit-up and bright. It seemed to be a hotel-like room, with a small sofa, a chair, and even a bed. There was a desk in the corner, and off to the side there was a separate area with a bathroom. It was typical of a cruise ship suite, specifically of a suite on the lower levels.
A cruise ship suite…
Wait…
WHAT THE FACTOR?! WAS I ON THE CRUISE SHIP ALREADY?!
I looked around frantically to see if there was any kind of window I could look out of. Noticing some fancy-looking curtains out of the corner of my eye, I ripped them open to see…
A giant blue ocean.
…
So!
WHAT THE HEXADECIMAL IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW???
I get a mysterious invitation to a cruise with zero search results, I’m told to go to an underground office in the middle of NOWHERE, and I black out while waiting! Then, when I wake up, I’M MAGICALLY ON SAID CRUISE??? This entire sequence of events is completely illogical! How could this have happened?! I don’t understand!!
Okay, Ringo, calm down… Breathe in and out… There’s gotta be an answer to this problem. Every problem has a solution. If it didn’t, then math wouldn’t exist. Think… what is the best course of action right now…?
Well… I suppose my best bet was to go outside? Considering how I seem to be in some kind of suite, I’m assuming that there’s probably other people outside, maybe in the lobby. There are supposed to be 15 other guests, after all. Inhaling a deep breath (and almost choking on it in the process), I gently opened the door to the outside of my suite, being met with a fancy lobby with a red carpet and an elegant pattern painted on the walls.
It took me a moment to really process the gravity of the situation.
Honestly, it’s still unbelievable that, out of all the people in Suzuran, I was chosen to go on this cruise. Granted, it was random, but still… I kinda felt like I didn’t deserve it. Other than the Puyo incident, I’m just a normal middle schooler who does middle schooler things. You know, do homework, hang out with friends, that kinda stuff. Being friends with two mages from alternate universes does this kind of stuff to you. It doesn’t make you feel important.
…But who am I kidding? Maguro was right. I deserve this. At least, I think so. I should be grateful that I got this opportunity in the first place. This is a one in a million chance to be on something like this! I should-
“OW!”
All of a sudden, I felt a force crash into me, making me lose my balance and fall. Because I apparently wasn’t in enough pain already. I moaned softly, my backside hurting from the sudden fall. I didn’t see who or what bumped into me because I was so lost in thought, but if it’s a “who”, they better have a good reason for it…
“Oh crap, sorry about that, I wasn’t looking…” A voice rang out. “Here, let me help you get up.” The voice sounded… weirdly synthesized? Humanlike, but also sort of robotic. I was probably just imagining things. A hand was extended towards me, and I grabbed it to pull myself up. “You okay?” The person said. Finally, I got a good look at who bumped into me. It was a young boy, probably a teenager like me, with a white and black outfit with yellow accents. He looked Japanese, but at the same time, he had yellow hair and blue eyes, which I’m 90% sure is uncommon in Japan. He looked… human, but it felt like something was off, and I just couldn’t figure out what it was.
“Oh, um, I’m okay.” I said, still a little disoriented from the fall. “Little dizzy, but okay…” “Yeah, sorry, I just wasn’t looking where I was going. Anyway, I’m guessing you’re one of the people they selected for this cruise?” The boy asked. “Uh, yeah. I’m gonna assume you are too…?” The boy nodded, smiling an almost stage-ready smile. “Alright, nice to meet you! My name’s Kagamine Len, but you can call me Len for short. I’m the Ultimate Twin Vocal!”
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Kagamine Len
Ultimate Twin Vocal
Vocaloid
Kagamine Len, hailing from the world of Vocaloid, is an android specifically programmed to sing any song in the world. With his “sister” of sorts, Kagamine Rin, they have traveled the world, doing many live performances and even partnering up with other singing androids for concerts. Len is modest and pretty casual, but if willing he can change the tone of the room from empty to ecstatic.
~~~
Huh? Ultimate… Twin Vocal…?
“Wait a sec. What do you mean, ‘Ultimate Twin Vocal’? Is that a title you’re supposed to be referred by?” I asked, puzzled. “Oh, you didn’t see the little card next to your suite bed, I’m guessing.” Len explained. “There’s a card on your suite’s nightstand that says all your information, like your age and your name and stuff. It’s pretty standard stuff, aside from the fact that you get a special title. For example, I got Ultimate Twin Vocal, because I’m an idol along with my ‘sister’ of sorts, Rin.”
“Oooh. That makes se- Hey, what do you mean ‘sister of sorts’? Surely siblings have to be related…?” I questioned. “Well, the thing is, me and Rin aren’t actually ‘related’. Not in the way normal people interpret relationships. This might sound a little weird, but me and Rin are androids who were programmed to sing songs together. Most people see us as siblings, but my relationship with Rin is up to interpretation.” Len answered. He shrugged then, saying, “Personally, I see her as my sister, but that’s just me.”
Oh!
So I’m here with a robot!
How… pleasant???
Well, at least that clears up a few things, like why his voice sounded synthesized. Still weird though. I mean, if he’s some kind of fantastic robot idol that can sing every song in the world, then why have I never heard of him? Surely something like that would be big news in the robotics department. Or maybe he’s on the newer side and they don’t want to show his capabilities to the public yet. That was probably it, but I had a feeling in my chest telling me it wasn’t.
“Okay, I have absolutely zero idea how the factor I’m going to respond to that, but thanks, I guess.” I said. “Anyway, you said the card was in my room, right? On the nightstand?” Len nodded, adding, “Yeah, the nightstand is next to your bed. You should be able to find it.” “Alright then!” I replied, and I headed back into my suite. I didn’t have time to properly look at it before, but… it was really pretty. Everything felt state-of-the-art. After a few seconds of admiring the room, I snapped back to reality and went to the nightstand, where there was indeed a card with my name on it.
“You found it?” Len asked from the doorway. “What’s it say?” “Oh, um, it says here… ‘Ringo Ando, Ultimate Student’.” I replied a little meekly.
Ultimate Student…
Huh.
What kind of a title is that?!
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Ringo Ando
Ultimate Student
Puyo Puyo
Ringo Ando, hailing from the world of Puyo Puyo, is a young girl who is part of her school’s Physics Club. Normally, she’d be an ordinary girl, but after an incident involving the breaking of the space-time continuum and the merging of universes, she’s learned how to play the original ‘Match 4’ game, Puyo Puyo. Occasionally, Ringo gets teleported to another universe as a result of the space-time continuum incident, but with the help of her friends, she always finds a way back home.
~~~
“Ooooh, your name’s Ringo, huh?” Len asked. “That name… it means ‘apple’ in Japanese. I’m guessing you like your fruits. Should have gotten Ultimate Greengrocer instead of Ultimate Student.” Not going to lie, but I really agreed with Len there. I mean, “Ultimate Student” is such a barebones title! My parents literally own a grocery store, Ultimate Greengrocer would have been just fine! I mean, it’s not like I can do much about my title now, since it’s already set in stone, but I can’t help but feel a little disappointed.
“Yeah, talk about getting the short end of the stick. Your title is ten times cooler.” I groaned, exiting the room (and taking the card with me, just in case). Len laughed at that, a little embarrassed. “At the very least, your title is something. There’s weirder titles that are out there.” Len noted. That was true, I suppose. My title is boring, but at least it isn’t oddly specific and strange.
“Well, anyway, Len, do you know where to go? I just woke up on this ship and I have no idea where I’m supposed to be.” I asked. Len shrugged again, looking more unsure. “Sorry, but I just woke up as well. I don’t have a clue either. Though, there seems to be some elevators near the end of this hallway.” He pointed at something far in the distance, which I could make out to be some kind of set of doors. “Oh, neat! There’s probably a lobby or something where I can ask around and find out what I’m supposed to do here.” I said. “Len, are you coming with me?” Len shook his head gently. “I’m gonna stay up here for a bit to figure stuff out. There’s still a lot I don’t know, like why I suddenly woke up here. But you seem to be someone I can trust. If there’s ever a problem, you know where to find me!” He answered. Ah, going for the solo route. I get it. “Okay! Thanks, Len! See ya!” I chimed, heading towards one of the elevators at the end of the hall.
After a while of walking (and almost getting lost), I reached one of the elevators at the hall’s end. It was sleek and tropical themed, perfect for a cruise of this caliber. Two buttons were on the side, one for up and one for down. Naturally, I pressed the “down” button so I could go to the lobby. After a while, the elevator automatically opened, and I got inside. There were 8 floors, which is kind of a low amount for a cruise ship, but hopefully it was made up for in size. Assuming the final floor was the lobby, I pressed the button for the 1st floor. Slowly, the elevator doors began to close, when…
“W-Wait!!”
A hand suddenly shot through the crack in the elevator doors, causing it to reopen the doors for a little bit longer. When the doors reopened, they revealed a girl who also looked like a teenager, albeit a little older than I was. She had pink hair with a little bit of it held up in a small side ponytail, and she wore a pink tracksuit with a black skirt. A shadow covered her face, making it look like she was dark and mysterious, but how can you be dark and mysterious wearing bright pink?
As soon as she noticed me, the girl seemed to freeze, but after a bit she took a deep breath in and entered the elevator hesitantly. As the elevator doors closed, a gentle bossa nova song started playing in the elevator, much to my surprise. I didn’t know that there were still elevators that played elevator music! Good to know! I noticed that the girl started to hum along softly, and as a little sign of friendship, I started humming along as well. She jumped at that, but took another breath in and kept humming, albeit a little more relaxed than before. This lasted the entire elevator ride, up until we both reached the lobby.
Finally, me and the girl reached the ground floor, and I carefully stepped out with the girl next to me. I turned to her and smiled. “Hey, you sound really good when you hum.” I said earnestly. The girl seemed surprised, and turned her head away sheepishly. “Um… thanks… I guess…” She responded in a voice I could barely hear. “Oh, I should probably introduce myself.” I said. “I’m Ringo Ando, but call me Ringo. Who might you be?” The girl seemed to choke up, shocked, and began muttering something to herself. After a while of letting her build up her courage, she quietly muttered, “W-W-Well… my name… m-my name is Hitori Goto, but… my n-nickname is… Bocchi…”
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Hitori “Bocchi” Goto
Ultimate Guitarist
Bocchi the Rock!
Hitori Goto, or better known as Bocchi, hailing from the world of Bocchi the Rock, is a teenage girl with dreams to become an amazing guitarist, with several of her guitar covers gaining tons of popularity online. However, Bocchi suffers from extreme social anxiety, which has led to her being a bit of a shut-in out of fear of disappointing others. She is currently a member of Kessoku Band, a small band based in Japan with 3 other members- a drummer, a bassist, and a singer.
~~~
“Bocchi, huh? Well, it’s nice to meet you. What’s your title? Like the Ultimate thing you got on your card.” I asked, hoping to spark up some conversation. “Oh… I got Ultimate Guitarist.” She answered, a little louder this time. “Hey, I’m pretty sure that this cruise has a concert hall somewhere. Maybe when you find it, you could play something?” I said. Bocchi’s eyes momentarily lit up, but then she returned to the same dark expression she had before, and turned her head away. “I… I guess I’ll have to see.” Bocchi replied. “Um… I-I… I have to… I have to go now. Thank you…” With that, Bocchi walked away to another part of the lobby, but it seemed more like she was borderline running. Maybe she was embarrassed? I wouldn’t put it past her. I was a little nervous coming here too.
Alright, I should probably look around. Out of the 15 other people here, I’ve met 2, Len and Bocchi. They’re friendly enough, but I figured it might be a good idea to see what the others are like. I noticed a small area with a couple of chairs and coffee tables, and a girl was sitting there with… Wait. Was that a rabbit? Was that a rabbit sitting at the coffee table?? Curious, I walked over, and the girl seemed to notice me immediately.
“Oh?” She piped up. “And who might you be?” With the air of elegance she had, she felt like a member of royalty. I didn’t know if I should curtsy or if I should just do nothing. “Ah, well, I’m Ringo Ando, but please call me Ringo.” I replied, a little offput by her graceful aura. “Ringo… Ringo Ando… Reminds me of one of the Lunarians living in the capital. She had the same first name as you.” The girl softly chuckled. “Well, it’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I am Kaguya Houraisan, Ultimate Princess, but you don’t need to refer to me by any kind of fancy title. Kaguya works well enough, plain and simple.”
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Kaguya Houraisan
Ultimate Princess
Touhou Project
Kaguya Houraisan, hailing from the world of Touhou, is a deity who used to rule the Moon and its Lunar Capital before being exiled to Earth for granting herself immortality. Alongside her servant, Erin, she lives a peaceful life in Gensokyo, watching the monthly lunar festivals. Despite no longer being an official princess, Kaguya still has a few servants and regularly exercises any special royal duties she might have, making her status a bit of an anomaly.
~~~
Wow… a real princess. I never thought I’d see the day… but, to be fair, this isn’t the weirdest thing that has happened to me. It’s just a little shocking, is all…
…
Hey, wait, if Kaguya is a princess, then why have I never heard of her?!
Kaguya casually sipped what looked like green tea from a fancy teacup, taking in the flavor. “Mmmm… For something not made authentically, this tea certainly is satisfying.” The rabbit scoffed, a bit annoyed. “If it’s not made naturally, it usually doesn’t taste very good. Trust me, I know.” He said flatly, crossing his arms.
Oh, okay. So that rabbit can talk. Oh. Yeah, that’s… that’s totally normal.
Then again, I do know Suketoudara and Ocean Prince, who are both talking fish, so… Why am I surprised?
“Ah, um… Mr. Rabbit, sir, I don’t think I’ve introduced myself yet… To you, at least.” I stammered a bit. “I’m Ringo Ando, but call me Ringo.” The rabbit took a good, long look at me with a weirdly judgy expression. After a while though, his expression softened into a small smile. “You look like a nice girl. I’m Rabbit, and my title is the Ultimate Farmer. It’s nice to meet you.”
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Rabbit
Ultimate Farmer
Winnie the Pooh
Rabbit, hailing from the world of Winnie the Pooh, is a, well, rabbit who lives a peaceful life tending to his garden’s crops in the Hundred Acre Wood. Rabbit is entirely dedicated to his work, and he hates any kind of distraction when he’s focusing- unfortunately for him, he lives in a place where misadventures happen almost every day, so distractions are pretty much guaranteed. While he enjoys the company of his friends, he is easily angered by them, with a certain energetic tiger specifically having a tendency to get on his nerves…
~~~
A rabbit who’s name is… Rabbit. That’s kind of redundant, but I didn’t come here to judge anybody. “Anyway… I’m guessing you both also were invited as guests on this cruise?” I asked in some attempt to start conversation. “A cruise… Well, I had never heard of such a thing in my lifetime, but when I received the invitation, it seemed interesting enough.” Kaguya stated. “I was told to go to a special shrine deep within Gensokyo, but when I got there, I… well, next thing I knew I just woke up in a fancy room.” “Huh? A shrine?” I asked. “My invitation said to go to an office in an underground parking lot.”
“That’s odd. My invitation said to go find a treehouse in the outskirts of the Hundred Acre Wood.” Rabbit noted. “But the same thing happened to me, where I just blacked out and woke up in my room. Perhaps our invitations are all different in some way?” “That… makes enough sense, I guess, especially considering how some of us live in different areas.” I said. “Doesn’t make it any less weird. In fact, it makes it even more weird, because that means all our invites are personalized.” Kaguya shook her head. “Well, whatever the case may be, this… ‘cruise’ has so far turned out to be wonderful.” She chimed. “Rabbit, you simply must try this tea.” Rabbit frowned at this. “Listen, lady, even if you’re a princess, that doesn’t mean you’ll tell me what to do. And I refuse to drink anything that isn’t natural!” He spat. Kaguya laughed softly again. “Well, there’s nothing I can do about that. You’re just missing out.” She stated rather simply.
“Hey!! Would you just stop messing with me already?!”
“Ehehehe~”
I left the two to their banter so I could explore more. As I walked away, a theory started to emerge in my mind. This whole cruise, I’ve noticed that everyone is vastly different in their own way. From princesses to shy guitarists to androids to actual talking rabbits, everyone has been unique. In fact, TOO unique. So, with this theory, I give an “if/then” statement. If everyone here is so different from each other, then that must mean that all the people on this cruise…
…are from other universes.
Look, I know it sounds insane, but I’ve had experience with other universes in the past, and I know anything can happen with stuff like this. The basic rules of life don’t apply. Anything goes. It’s illogical, completely nonsensical. But that’s just how it is. And I wouldn’t put it past whoever is in charge of this cruise to dabble in the delicate art of dimension hopping. Yet this raises another question… who did this? And how are they capable of this dimension warping power, if my theory is really true? The invite said just a simple “S.S. Melna Team”, but this doesn’t exactly clarify who’s in charge of this whole thing. There were so many questions I had that I felt my head spinning.
“Hey, you good? You’re creepily staring into the distance and it’s freaking me out.”
Huh?
A voice snapped me out of my thoughts, and when I looked to see the source, it was… well, actually, I have no idea what it was. It was round and circular, but it also had cat-like ears and levitating hands. It was just… floating there, looking at me with a confused expression. What was that thing? It reminded me of a ghost… Okay, actually, maybe I shouldn’t compare it to a ghost, otherwise I’m going to start freaking out along with this guy.
“Oh, uhh…” I stuttered. “S-Sorry about that. I was just lost in thought. I swear I’m not weird.” At that, the cat-circle-creature laughed. “Relax, I was just messing with you! No need to take things so seriously, dude. Anyway, I’m Magolor, Ultimate Mage. What’s up?” He said, doing a polite bow… somehow, considering he didn’t have a waist.
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Magolor
Ultimate Mage
Kirby
Magolor, hailing from the world of Kirby, is an alien from the distant depths of the planet Halcandra… or so he says. Magolor has a notorious track record for being a liar who makes others do his dirty work, but after a certain incident involving a failed world domination attempt, he apparently changed his ways and joined the side of good. However, every now and then, he pulls tricks on others, under the insistent reason that the person being tricked is just taking things too seriously, so maybe he hasn’t actually changed at all.
~~~
“Oh, um… Nice to meet you. I’m Ringo. Uh, pardon me if this is an intrusive question but…” I stuttered, unconsciously avoiding eye contact. “Uhh… what are you, exactly??”Magolor blinked quizzically, but quickly changed his expression to a more light-hearted one. “Why, I’m a Halcandran, of course! What, you’ve never heard of it?” He chimed. “Actually, don’t answer that. It’s an old, dusty, abandoned planet, of course you’ve never heard of it.” He shrugged casually, as if the fact that he was from a ghost town of a planet was normal.
(Ringo, note to self, stop comparing this guy to ghosts.)
“Anyways, I think it’s about time I ask YOU a question.” Magolor said, suddenly changing his tone to a questioning one. “What are YOU? You look like you’ve seen your fair share of magic chicanery. Trust me, I can tell.” This Magolor guy… he looked nice, but for some reason, I felt like he had more sinister intentions. Still, I meekly replied, “Uh… Well, I’m a human. From Suzuran.” At the word “human”, Magolor paused, processing for a moment, and after a while, began… laughing? “Hahahahahahaha!! No WAY! Dude, I didn’t think there were any more humans out there. I only know one human, and she’s a weak little kid with like, ZERO strength whatsoever.” Magolor giggled. He proceeded to look me up and down, before pointing directly at my face. “And you remind me so much of her! Man, no wonder humans aren’t around anymore. They’re all super weak!” He continued.
Okay, and he was a jerk as well. Good to know. “If you dislike humans so much, then why are you bothering to talk to me?” I asked, growling. “Hehehe… No reason in particular. You just look fun to mess around with.” Magolor answered, his expression changing to a sly smile… or, at least, it would be, if his mouth wasn’t covered by his scarf. Before I could even say anything else, Magolor’s tone shifted again, back to the same jolly fellow he was before. “Anyway! It’s been nice meeting you! See you around, friend!” And with that, he nonchalantly floated away, humming something to himself. I didn’t know if I should be freaked out by how cryptic he was, or annoyed… Eh, forget that dude. I don’t need to be around someone like him.
I decided to explore the lobby a little bit more, taking in the sights of everything around me. This entire situation… it’s just been so bizarre. I’ve still got so many questions that need to be answered! Everyone I’ve met so far is… well, I can’t say that they’re all nice, but they at least seem to tolerate my presence. Yet with everyone I’ve met, there’s always been something weird or off about them. I haven’t met anyone that’s actually, for a lack of a better word, “normal”. Then again, I haven’t met everyone on this ship. There’s still, like, 10 other people I don’t know here, so I suppose the best course of action would be to meet them all and see if they know anything about the situation.
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a back area with tables and chairs that kind of resembled the coffee table area from earlier. It seemed to be a cafeteria, which was a stroke of luck for me considering how I hadn’t eaten anything since I woke up in my room. I strolled over, curious as to what kind of food they offered, when I suddenly heard a loud clatter, like the sound of shelves shaking… Jeez, I almost had a heart attack! I guess someone else was thinking the same thing, because I heard a yelp of surprise when it happened. I looked towards the source, and it was a young teenage girl sitting with a black-haired boy. They both seemed pretty alarmed.
“What the heck was that?!” The boy yelled, concerned. “It sounded like it came from the kitchen.” The girl noted. At that, the boy shuddered. “Oh, don’t tell me it was that monster girl… I had a bad feeling about her.” He groaned. “Excuse me!” I interrupted as politely as possible. When the boy and girl looked over at me, I continued. “Hey, I’m Ringo Ando, and I just got here. Do you guys know what’s going on?” I questioned. “I don’t know, but we saw a purple monster girl go in the kitchen earlier.” The girl explained. “We didn’t do anything because she seemed to ignore us, but I have the feeling she’s up to no good.”
Suddenly, the boy shot up out of his seat. “Well, I’m gonna go investigate!” He announced, heading towards the kitchen door. The outside of it said “staff only”, but it was unlocked, and the boy bursted inside. “Wait a moment!” The girl yelled, but at that point the boy was already in the kitchen. She sighed pathetically and looked at me with a humored stare. “Haha, I knew that kid looked impulsive. He reminds me a lot of someone I know… Oh, you said your name was Ringo, yes? I’m sorry we met on such weird circumstances. I’m Mona, and I’m the Ultimate Delivery Girl.” She beamed with a bright smile.
Finally, someone who looked normal… I think.
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Mona
Ultimate Delivery Girl
WarioWare
Mona, hailing from the world of WarioWare, is a teenage girl living in Diamond City, a sprawling metropolis where anything can happen. Over the course of her life, Mona has taken up various odd jobs to support herself, ranging from ordinary jobs such as working at a pizza restaurant to more unconventional jobs like being a pop star performing live on stage. Currently, she works for WarioWare Inc., a company owned by a certain greedy treasure hunter, making short microgames based on her real-life experiences.
~~~
“It’s nice to meet you!” I replied. “That being said, we should probably go check on that kid to make sure he doesn’t get into any trouble.” “Ahaha, yeah… Here, I’ll go with you. Just in case.” She said, rising from her seat and walking over to the door. I followed her, and she gently opened the door to the kitchen. It was an ordinary kitchen, all things considered. If anything, it was typical of a restaurant you’d find nearby a hotel- fancy to appeal to tourists. There was just one problem though, and that was the current state of it.
To say it bluntly, the kitchen was a mess. And a big dinosaur girl was right in the middle of it, searching through the cabinets.
The boy was also in the kitchen, trying to argue with the dinosaur girl about making a mess and scaring the living daylights out of him, but the dinosaur girl ignored him and kept ransacking the cabinets. “Hmmm… nothing but pots and pans here. Nothing good.” She loudly closed the cabinet door, and got up with a huff. “Hey! I’m trying to tell you to stop messing around and you aren’t listening!” The boy yelled. She turned to him with a deadpan expression of annoyance. “Okay, and? Why do I gotta listen to someone like you?” She then chuckled darkly to herself. “I bet that if I picked you up and threatened to tear your face off, you’d think twice before bugging me again.”
“Okay, let’s not threaten other people with death, here!” I announced, trying to divert the topic. At the sound of my voice, the dinosaur girl looked at me, narrowing her eyes. “Who are you again?” She asked flatly. “I’m Ringo Ando, and you shouldn’t threaten other people!” I yelled in some attempt to appear assertive. “We’re all on this cruise ship together, so we’ve gotta get along, right?” The dinosaur girl stared at me for a little longer, before laughing to herself. “Dude, you sound corny as hell right now. I’m just looking for some food, and this kid’s being annoying. Gotta get him to shut up somehow.” She chuckled.
“Wh- I AM NOT ANNOYING!!” The boy retorted.
“Yeah, keep telling yourself that.” The girl replied.
“Grrrr…”
“Mmmm, I’m pretty much done here anyways. I don’t see any food that I like, so I’m outta here.” With that, the dinosaur girl casually walked over to the kitchen exit, but as she opened the door, I ran up to her. “Wait! Hold on, I never caught your name. What is it?”I said. She stared at me for a while before smirking. “Name’s Susie, Ultimate Bully. Feel free to talk to me if you feel like fucking around and finding out.” She snickered, before walking out and closing the door behind her with a loud SLAM.
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Susie
Ultimate Bully
Deltarune
Susie, hailing from the world of Deltarune, is a draconian high schooler known for being the local bully in her town of Hometown. While Susie appears aggressive and definitely has the strength to back her threats up, deep inside she’s pretty lonely and doesn’t have many friends due to her violent nature. She’s currently on an adventure with one of her few friends, Kris, to save the world as one of the three heroes of legend, according to an ancient prophecy from long ago.
~~~
As soon as Susie left, the boy crossed his arms and frowned. “Hmph, that Susie’s a real jerk! Who the heck does she think she is?” He huffed, muttering something under his breath about Susie being “even worse than that Gary”. “Well, you don’t have to worry about her for now. She left.” Mona said gently, comforting the boy and trying to make him calm down. “Hey, how about you introduce yourself to Ringo here? She’s the one who defended you, after all.”
“Oh, really? Thanks!” The boy chimed, his attitude changing in a an instant. “Sorry you had to see me yell like that. Let me introduce myself. I’m Ash Ketchum from Pallet Town, and I’m the Ultimate Pokémon Trainer! You look pretty cool, so how about we be friends?”
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Ash Ketchum
Ultimate Pokémon Trainer
Pokémon: The Series
Ash Ketchum, hailing from the world of Pokémon, is a 10 year old boy on a quest to become a “Pokémon Master” and be the best Pokémon trainer in the world. His partner Pokémon is Pikachu, an electric mouse who he treats like his best friend, and they frequently work in tandem to take down Gym Leaders and other rivals that come their way. Ash tends to be a bit dense and sometimes even arrogant since he’s just begun his journey, but he makes up for it with his endless amount of energy and enthusiasm for everything he does.
~~~
“A… Poké… huh?” I repeated, confused. “Aw man, you don’t know about Pokémon either?! You and Mona must live under a rock or something…” Ash complained. “Well, basically, Pokémon are these cool creatures that you can find everywhere in the world… Or at least where I’m from. There’s lots of different types of them, with tons of different powers and abilities. For example, my first Pokémon friend was Pikachu, who has electricity abilities! As a Pokémon Trainer, it’s my job to take care of any Pokémon friends I make and help them become the very best there ever was!”
Ash seemed excited talking about his “Pokémon” friends at first, but after a while, his smile slowly faded, and he grew more solemn. “The thing is, uh… I don’t have any of my Pokémon with me right now. Pikachu, Bulbasaur, Charmander… they’re all gone, and I have no idea where they went.” He explained. “I assumed they got stolen as part of some evil plan from Team Rocket or something, but there’s no way those guys would go through this much effort just to take my Pokémon… Plus, I’m in here with people who flat-out don’t know what Pokémon ARE. It’s been really weird, and I’m still trying to figure stuff out. But hopefully with you and Mona, I can find out what’s happening.”
“Oh, don’t even get me started, because I’m just as confused as you are, Ash.” I responded. “Don’t worry, I’m sure we’re bound to figure out what’s happening. If I know one thing for sure, it’s that this place is 100% sketchy.” At that, Ash returned to the same cheery smile he had before. “Yeah, you’re right!” He beamed, as if nothing had ever happened.
“Well, this has been nice, but I think I should get back to looking around here.” I said. “I still haven’t explored this whole lobby section yet, and there’s tons of questions that need answering.” “Alright, good luck, Ringo! Feel free to get us if you need to!”Mona chimed, waving. I waved goodbye towards them, and set off to explore more of the lobby.
Near the coffee table area (where Kaguya and Rabbit were still chatting about the authenticity of the ship’s tea), I noticed a reception desk that was strangely empty, aside from one of those little bell things that you ring at a desk to get someone’s attention. Curious, I ringed it, but nothing happened. That brung up another question… The “S.S. Melna team” that invited me here… Who were they? And why haven’t I seen any employees that work for them? I know I’ve been asking a lot of questions since I got here- heck, even before I got here- but you really can’t blame me. I mean, my favorite subject is math, which is all about asking and solving problems…
Just then, I felt a smaller presence behind me. When I turned to look, it was some kind of… mole thing…? Well, it was a mole, standing and walking like a human, but I don’t know why I’m surprised when I know two fish with arms and legs… and now a talking rabbit as well. Anyway, the mole reached up as high as he could to ring the bell, managing to at least get his gloved hand (claw???) on it, emitting a weak ringing sound. Like my attempt, there was no response. “Uh, hello…?” The mole said, trying to get someone’s attention. (Yep, this one speaks too.) “If anyone’s here, I’ve got a few questions ‘bout this whole thing… Hello? Anyone?”
Silence.
The mole frowned and ringed the bell a little harder. “Excuse me.” He asserted firmly. “I KNOW there are employees here. One of ‘ya has ‘ta at least know I’m here.”
Again, silence.
Frustrated, the mole’s previously-squinted eyes shot open, and he slammed the bell with a sound that sounded more like a THUD than a ring with all of his power (which caused me to jump a little). “HEY!!” He yelled. “‘YA BETTER NOT BE IGNORIN’ ME!! I’M RIGHT HERE!!” I was a little intimidated, but I tapped the mole on the shoulder, and when he looked over to me, I said, “Um, I don’t think anyone is here right now… Maybe you should try again later…?”
“Ohoho! But there IS someone here!” A whimsical voice rang out from behind the counter. Promptly, a girl popped out, singing a dramatic fanfare as if to announce her presence. She looked… fairly normal, all things considered, but she seemed to have what looked like horse ears and a tail. At first I thought they were fake, but that hope was dashed when I saw them twitch and fidget just like a real horse would. “Rutututuuuuuu~ Your lovely Ultimate Marathon Runner Gold Ship is here to serve you! Or you can call me Golshi if that suits you better~” She chimed, doing a silly spin. Just when I thought that there were at least some normal people here…
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Gold Ship
Ultimate Marathon Runner
Uma Musume: Pretty Derby
Gold Ship (referred to as Golshi for short), is an Uma Musume known for being an eccentric wildcard both in and out of racing. As a horse-human hybrid, she has the speed and durability of the strongest horses in the world, but no one can tell whether she’ll give it her all during a race around or laze around for the entirety of it. Golshi is willing to do dangerous stunts and tricks all in the name of having fun, so nobody can accurately tell what her next move may be.
~~~
“SERIOUSLY?! ‘Ya were here the entire time and ‘ya haven’t said nuthin’?! DON’T ‘YA KNOW IT’S RUDE ‘TA LEAVE PEOPLE HANGIN’?!” The mole yelled. Despite the mole’s obnoxious yelling, the horse girl didn’t seem to care. “I didn’t leave you hanging anywhere, old man~ I just got here and I dunno what you mean!” She taunted, shrugging. This only angered the mole even more, his face getting redder and more frustrated. “LISTEN HERE, PUNK!! I don’t who ‘ya are or why ‘ya look like a horse and a human did a fusion, but ‘ya better learn ‘ta RESPECT ‘YER ELDERS! Wait… HEY!! I’M NOT EVEN THAT OLD!!” He argued, slamming the desk.
“Huh? And who are you supposed to be again?” Golshi asked, staring and narrowing her eyes at the mole. “Grrrr… The name’s Resetti! MR. RESETTI! AND DON’T ‘YA FORGET IT!!” The mole growled. He paused for a moment. “Oh yeah, I’m also the Ultimate Monitor, but that ain’t important.”
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Sonny Resetti
Ultimate Monitor
Animal Crossing
Mr. Resetti (full name Sonny Resetti), hailing from the world of Animal Crossing, is a mole who works for the Reset Surveillance Center, a small group dedicated to stopping “resets” from occurring. While Mr. Resetti has a short temper and snaps easily, every rant he throws your way is meant with good intentions, as he deeply cares about the wellbeing of others. He’s garnered quite the reputation for scaring people, even though he genuinely doesn’t mean to come off as such…
~~~
“Ooooooh…” Golshi said, thinking to herself. “Resetti… Mr. Resetti… Resetti, Resetti, pasta and spaghetti…” She thought for a few moments more, but suddenly her previously silly expression went deadpan, as if she had just seen something serious. “Sorry, but I have no idea who you are.” She stated flatly. Just like that Magolor guy, this Golshi girl seems to be able to change her tone on a whim… It WOULD be admirable if I hadn’t already seen my share of nonsense for the day.
Resetti seemed even more enraged, but before he spoke, he took a deep breath in to collect himself and calm down. “Urgh… I haven’t had ‘ta deal with this level of disrespect since that kid moved in… At the very least, do ‘ya have any idea where we’re gonna be goin’ on this cruise?” Resetti asked. “About that… I don’t know either. But this has been pretty fun so far, so honestly who cares?” Golshi answered, changing to a laid-back expression. “Besides, I dunno why you’re asking me. I got invited here too, you know.”
Resetti let out a small mutter of annoyance, too low for me to hear. “‘Ya coulda just started with that, twerp! Ugh, forget this, I’m outta here. None of you guys can help me out anyways.” Before he left, Resetti turned to me, and I instinctively prepared to get yelled at. But instead he sheepishly adjusted his helmet and said, “Oh, hey kid, I completely forgot you were there… Uh, did ‘ya ever tell me ‘yer name, or…?” “I’m Ringo, Ringo Ando.” I responded, more quickly than I probably should have. I don’t know why I felt so intimidated by a mole of all things, but after his argument with Golshi, I couldn’t help but be at least a little wary. At my answer, he simply nodded, and said, “Got it. Sorry ‘ya had ‘ta see that argument there. Here’s hopin’ we meet again, since ‘ya don’t seem like a nuisance. Now SCRAM!!” And with that, he promptly walked away, leaving just me and Golshi.
“I dunno what that old man was yelling at me for~ It’s like he’s the fun police or something.” Golshi commented. “To be fair, you were the one who aggravated him in the first place.” I retorted. “You probably should have been more careful.” At that, Golshi dramatically frowned. “But being careful isn’t any fun! I’d rather just do what I want, and talk however I want. After all, us Uma Musume are meant to run free-“ She began.
“Sorry, but can you guys shut up? I’m tryna read something over here.” A voice interrupted.
When me and Golshi turned to look at the source, we saw a girl with black hair in a black and red school uniform, kneeling down to read some papers from behind the counter. She seemed deep in thought. “Ehhhh… Another person I don’t know, huh? Who are you supposed to be?” Golshi inquired, sounding a bit defensive. The girl got up (also losing her balance in the process), papers in hand, and said, “My name’s Blad, and I’m the Ultimate Broker. You guys probably didn’t notice me ‘coz of your arguing, but I came over here to read these papers. (They might make for good information later.)” With that, she got back to carefully examining the papers.
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Blad
Ultimate Broker
Legend of Dark Witch
Blad, hailing from the world of Legend of Dark Witch, is an information broker who exchanges helpful information for money, but only for the right price. Normally, a girl her age would be attending school, but she frequently neglects her studies in order to dabble in the affairs of the underworld. Even though Blad tries to come off as cool and serious, she has a very clumsy side to her that gets more and more obvious the more time you spend with her.
~~~
Curious, I inched over to see the papers Blad was holding, and when she noticed me, I asked, “What do they say?” Blad frowned, and answered, “It’s basic stuff, like how many rooms there are on each floor and its dimensions. Everything that would have personal information like who made it is blacked out. But I guess it’s something…” With a huff, she put the papers back in the counter and crossed her arms. “Damn, I was hoping for something good. Then again, there’s probably nothing too major to know about a cruise ship.” She claimed, dusting herself off.
“Why do you wanna know about that stuff, anyway? You some kinda top-secret government spy?” Golshi asked, leaning in with a grin. “Hah, no way.” Blad brushed a strand of hair from her face, her voice calm but confident. “I’m a broker. I trade valuable information for money. If it’s top-secret, I can probably sell it—for the right price.” She adjusted her collar and flashed a smug smile, clearly enjoying the attention. “Personally, I just think the free-roaming, opportunistic rogue thing suits me better, y’know? No rules. No strings.”
Golshi’s eyes lit up like she’d just found a kindred spirit. “Finally, someone here who gets it! Living by rules isn’t living at all! People should do whatever they want if it’s fun, right?!”
“Well,” Blad said with a shrug, “I still have to do my job, so it’s not like I’m totally free. But I get what you’re saying.”She straightened up, clearly satisfied with herself. “Anyway, I’ve entertained you two long enough. I’ll see you around.”With that, she spun on her heel in an overly dramatic exit… then immediately tripped and fell flat on her face. The sound echoed off the walls of the ship, probably louder than it should have been.
For a moment, nobody moved. Then Blad sprang up, dusted herself off, and marched off twice as fast, glancing back every few steps to see if we were watching. Golshi snorted. “Hmmmm… I like that girl. She thinks she’s cool, but she’s just as silly as everyone else.” She giggled and started after her. “I’m gonna go mess with her more.”Before she ran off completely, she turned back and waved at me. “Bye, apple kid!”And just like that, she was gone, vanishing around the corner at a speed I didn’t think was humanly possible.
Well.
That was certainly a debacle and a half.
Trying to forget whatever the heck THAT was, I walked back into the open area, near the coffee tables. There’s certainly a lot of, uh… characters here. Yeah. Characters. It just makes me even more suspicious of what’s going on. Moles… girls with horse ears… purple dinosaurs… It’s all so weird. A lot of weird things have happened to me, but this is probably at the top of the list for most weird. But… I think this is as weird as it gets. I think. Suddenly, my thoughts were interrupted by a voice calling for my attention.
“Hey, are you lost? You need help with something?” I heard a female voice call out. When I turned to the source, I saw a tan-skinned girl with brown hair and a strangely bread-like scent coming from her. She seemed nice enough, but… is it just me, or did she seem weirdly… flat? Like… flat in the sense of how paper is 2D.
“Oh, no, I’m fine! I’m just, er, exploring the lobby.” I answered. “Oh, alright! No, I was just asking because you looked a little weirded out, and honestly… with the way some of these people here are, I don’t blame you.” She admitted, leaning in closer as if she didn’t want anyone else to hear her words. I laughed at that, and said, “Yeah, no kidding. It’s nice to meet someone who’s aware of just how insane this all is, haha. Anyway, my name’s Ringo Ando, what’s yours?”
The girl stood there for a second, seemingly confused, but before I could ask what was wrong, her expression returned to normal and she smiled warmly. “I’m Croissant Cookie! I’m the Ultimate Mechanic, so if you ever need help, you can count on me!”
…Wait.
“Cookie”?
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Croissant Cookie
Ultimate Mechanic
Cookie Run
Croissant Cookie, hailing from the world of Cookie Run, is a Cookie (a gingerbread person made using a special, unique ingredient) who works at the Time Balance Department, where she regularly works to solve anomalies in the space-time continuum. Well-known in her work force for her close relation to its Director, Croissant handles every problem with a positive mindset, though when under extreme stress her more anxious personality traits begin to show. When she’s not working at the TBD, she’s usually hanging out with her friends Sandwich Cookie and Hero Cookie, studying and attending school together.
~~~
“Um… yeah, that’s cool and all, but what do you mean, Cookie?” I asked, a bit concerned as to how “normal” this Croissant Cookie actually was. “Ah, figures.” She hummed, sighing. “You see, where I’m from, just about everyone I know is a Cookie, made of gingerbread and a special ingredient that makes them unique. My name is Croissant Cookie because I was baked with hints of croissant in my dough. It’s sort of hard to explain to someone who isn’t a Cookie like I am, but hey, what can you do?”
I nodded, despite not really understanding. “I get it.” I lied.
“I have the feeling you don’t.” Croissant bluntly stated.
“Yeah, I don’t.”
“Well, there’s not much I can do about that, I guess… Regardless, you shouldn’t treat me any different, alright?” Croissant reassured. “Even if you’re not a Cookie, you do seem like someone reliable. I’m looking forward to knowing you on this ship!” In return, I smiled, answering, “Alright, thank you!” You know what? It was nice to see someone who was actually kind of normal for once. Emphasis on “kind of”. Even if Croissant’s a Cookie or whatever she called it, she seems nice enough. Maybe we could even be good friends!
“You shouldn’t trust everyone you meet immediately.” A younger voice called out then. When we turned to see who it was, it was a boy with chestnut hair and a traditional school uniform. He stared at us with a sort of disapproving glare. What was his problem? I mean, we didn’t know him. “Uh… can I help you?” Croissant asked, a confused look on her face. The boy stepped forward, crossing his arms and scowling. “You two were too quick to become friends. Do you not believe in building up relationships rather than just starting them on the spot?” He explained. “Who knows, that girl (or at least, I think she is one) may betray you later.”
“Oh come on, you’re being suspicious for no reason. Who are you, anyway? Why do you care so much about our conversation?” I asked, a little annoyed. At my response, the boy cleared his throat, and said, “My name is Syaoran Li, and I am the Ultimate Swordsman. I have only come to this place to fulfill my rightful duties.”
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Syaoran Li
Ultimate Swordsman
Cardcaptor Sakura
Syaoran Li, hailing from the world of Cardcaptor Sakura, is a young boy who believes that he should be the one tasked with collecting the magical Clow Cards, special cards holding incredible power. Unfortunately for him, someone else has already been tasked with collecting the Clow Cards, making him that person’s rival. Although Syaoran appears cold and cynical, he does have a kind heart saved for those that he respects and looks up to.
~~~
“Oh, wow, a swordsman?” Croissant inquired. “What kind of duties do you fulfill, if it’s alright to ask?” (From my experience, the only swordsman I know is a weirdo, and to be honest, this kid seems pretty weird too. But in a different way.)
“That is not for you to know.” Syaoran stated rather bluntly. “It’s something that doesn’t concern you.” “Well, she was just trying to be nice.” I frowned. “If you’re gonna come over and talk to us, you might as well be a bit more polite!” The boy sighed, muttering under his breath, before saying, “Whatever. I knew you both were hopeless.”
“Uh huh.” Croissant said dryly. “Because the little kid knows so much.”
“Excuse me?” Syaoran growled. “I’ll have you know tha-“
“Yo, what the hell’s going on over here?”
A voice broke through the beginning of the argument, and when I turned to look, it was two boys that seemed to be older and taller than me. One was wearing weird rags and had hair that looked like a leek or one of those green onions, and the other was wearing what looked like boxing shorts and had arms wrapped in bandages. They both seemed… uh… is there a word for when someone looks both normal and crazy at the same time? I don’t think there is.
“This conversation is none of your business.” Syaoran said, though I could have sworn for a second that I heard his voice waver a bit from seeing someone older than him. “Actually, it sort of is my business, because I can hear your arguing from across the room. Keep it down, kid.” The leek-boy said. The boxer boy then came up from behind him, and said in a quiet voice, “…Hey, you don’t need to do this.” “You’re the one who said they were distracting you.” The leek-boy answered.
“Hmph.” Syaoran huffed. “All of you are idiots. You know what? Nevermind. I don’t have time for this. Goodbye.” And with that, he walked away. I bet he was thinking that he was so cool for that, but really, he’s just a jerk if anything. After watching the boy walk away, the leek-boy turned back to us.
“Sorry about intruding. It’s just that me and Mac were having a conversation and that kid was distracting him.” The leek-boy explained. “You’re one of the people attending this cruise too, right?” At my nod, he smiled. “Alright, good to know. Name’s Senku Ishigami. They gave me the Ultimate Scientist title, but to be honest, not sure if I deserve a title that grand.”
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Senku Ishigami
Ultimate Scientist
Dr. Stone
Senku Ishigami, hailing from the world of Dr. Stone, is a high schooler who woke up almost 3000 years in the future to find that everyone he knew had been turned into stone. Being a prodigy in the arts of science, he managed to create a revival fluid that could bring back anyone from petrification, however this fluid was taken advantage of by one of the very people he revived. Currently, he is on a mission to take back this fluid by building up a “Kingdom of Science” and restoring civilization.
~~~
After introducing himself, he turned to the boxer boy. “And this is Mac… or as he’s known in the ring, Little Mac. He’s the Ultimate Boxer, but he’s pretty modest about it.” Mac shyly waved, attempting a smile. “Uh… hi.” He said rather awkwardly.
~~~
CHARACTER PROFILE
Little Mac
Ultimate Boxer
Punch Out!!
Little Mac (or more commonly known as Mac), hailing from the world of Punch Out, is a boxer who became the World Video Boxing Association’s champion at only 17. Although he tends to be on the quiet side of things, he is a master at boxing and has taken down opponents that are twice as big as him. He usually spends his days training with his previously-champion coach, bettering himself with every day that passes by.
~~~
“It’s nice to meet you two!” I said earnestly. “There’s certainly some… well, interesting people on this ship, but it’s nice to know people who are a bit more normal!” “Well, not sure about me being normal, but hey, nice to meet you as well.” Senku said. “It is pretty interesting around here. Everyone here is 10 billion percent definitely not from where I’m from. It makes me curious as to who put this all together…” Just then, almost as if on cue, an announcement echoed throughout the ship, an unfamiliar voice reaching my ears. It felt… unnatural. Sweet, but in the sense of a sour candy. The kind that makes you want to throw up the second you put it in your mouth.
Ding, dong, bing, bong.
“Helloooooooo cruisers!!” The voice said, a sort of jovial feeling about it. “Thank you for choosing to be with us on the S.S. Melna! Please make your way to the center of the first floor’s lobby… if you aren’t there already, that is! Gyahahahaha!!” With that, the PA shut off, with another ding, dong, bing, bong. When the announcement finished, Croissant turned to me with a smile. “That’s our cue, isn’t it?” She said. “C’mon, Ringo, let’s go!” I followed her to the center of the lobby, and gradually the center filled up with the others.
After some time of waiting, I felt someone come up behind me. When I turned to see who it was, it was Len, waving with a grin. “Hey, Ringo! You heard the announcement, right?” He asked. “Yeah, this must be the cruise ship overview or something.” I answered. “Honestly, I hope they provide maps for us, because this place looks really big.” At that, Len’s head tilted quizzically. “Well, yeah, this place is big, but… there’s only 16 suites in the top floor. And we aren’t allowed to go to the other 6 floors.” He explained. Huh… that was odd. I don’t think that’s normal. Just when I was finding some normalcy around here…
All of a sudden, the lights went out, causing a bit of panic among us.
“Eek! Who did that?!”
“Hey, this isn’t funny!”
“What’s going on?”
“Gyahahaha… GyahahahaHAAAAAAA!!”
There was a thud, sounding like something heavy had just dropped on the floor. A spotlight had shone on where it had come from, revealing… Uh… Well… How do I say this, exactly? It’s… uh… Okay, you know what? I’m just going to say it outright.
It was a robot dragon.
“Gyahahahahaha! Hello, cruisers!! And welcome aboard the S.S. Melna’s maiden voyage!” The dragon said. (Of course it spoke. Why wouldn’t it?) “I am your lovely, captivating captain for this entire trip… we’re glad you chose us, because this cruise is to DIE for!” It did an energetic spin around, smiling a toothy, almost sinister grin. I didn’t like this thing at all.
“Ah, but where are my manners? I almost forgot to introduce myself…” It began. It then hit an elegant pose. “I am MonoWyrm! Captain of the S.S. Melna, and your caretaker for the foreseeable future!!” Almost immediately, everyone began to murmur among themselves.
“What is this thing saying?”
“This has gotta be a prank!”
“I don’t know what’s happening anymore…”
“Erm. Excuse me. I’ll have you know I’m no thing! And this is no prank either!” MonoWyrm explained, furrowing its nonexistent brow. “I’m the real deal, y’know? Honest to goodness, I’m your captain!”Len raised his hand then, signaling to MonoWyrm that he had a question. “You! Blonde kid with the banana hair! What’s your question?” MonoWyrm exclaimed, pointing at Len.
“Hey, I don’t…! Whatever. Um, I have a question about one of the things you just said.” Len questioned. “What… exactly did you mean by ‘caretaker for the foreseeable future’…?” MonoWyrm blinked, then snorted. “Oh, I was about to get to that point! Impatient, aren’t we?” It giggled. “Nah, I get it! I bet you’re as excited as I am! Well, let’s jump straight into that!” I could hear Len protest for a moment before shutting himself down, as if he didn’t want to say anything.
“Anyway, introductions aside! You all are probably wondering to yourselves what the end date of this voyage is.” MonoWyrm explained. “Well, the long answer is 1 billion years from now when the Sun becomes too hot for Earth to sustain life and we all inevitably die from the heat, but… Short answer? There isn’t one! You all are going to be on this wonderful cruise…”
It then smirked, a dark shadow crossing its face.
“…Until the day you die.”
…
Alright, that didn’t make any sense whatsoever.
I understand that there are quite a few people on this cruise who are “different” to say the least, but… staying here forever? With a crazy robot dragon? I… I think my brain’s stopped working at this point. I can hear panicked murmurs around me, crying out “this can’t be” and “this has to be a joke”, but I don’t care right now. There has to be at least some logic to this. Right? Right??
I don’t…
“Oh, for goodness sake, MonoWyrm. You speak of it as if they won’t escape. Can’t you have some sense for once…?”
There was another thud, mechanical and heavy just like the sound MonoWyrm had made before. A spotlight had shone on where it had come from, revealing… Oh. Oh brother. No, don’t tell me that… is it really…? Ugh, I guess it is. Well, I suppose there was no point in hiding it.
It was another robot dragon. And it talked, too.
“Ooooooh? Well, if it isn’t the lowly co-captain! What, was sitting around doing nothing too tiring for you?” MonoWyrm questioned, seeming to become a bit more aggressive. It then noticed the confused audience, and perked up almost immediately. “Ah, right! Everyone, I’d like you to meet the not-nearly-as-wonderful-as-me co-captain of this cruise, MonoDraco! C’mon, MonoDraco, say hi! It’s rude to stay silent, you know!”
MonoDraco didn’t say anything. It merely huffed in annoyance.
“…Hmph. Aurafarming as usual, I see. Haaah, I always knew you were the lesser one! Can’t even go one second without looking cool…” MonoWyrm rambled, shaking its head in disapproval. “Now, what were you going to say? Something about escaping?” At the key word, MonoDraco seemed to shift in demeanor, going from neutral to intimidating. “Correct. Although it is true you will spend your life living in the cruise for the foreseeable future, there is one way to leave and return to your home. I personally do not recommend it, but if it’s what you wish to do, fine by me.” MonoDraco explained.
“Well, how do you leave then?” I asked out loud.
MonoDraco turned its head away then, no longer facing the audience. “If you manage to disrupt the peaceful life of this cruise, and get away with it, then and only then are you allowed to-“
“Oh my GOOOOOOD stop beating around the bush already!!” MonoWyrm shouted, yawning as if it was bored. “You gotta kill somebody if you want to leave! It’s really not that hard and YOU’RE making such a big deal about it! Man, you are STUPID!”
…Oh.
Murder.
You have to commit murder to leave.
…
It took everything in my power to not throw up right then and there.
Almost immediately, the room erupted with cries of disgust and pleading, begging “there must be another way” and “this has to be a joke” and yet… all of it was real. I… didn’t know how to feel. Fear? Regret? Hopelessness?
Despair, maybe?
“…It is true.” MonoDraco admitted. “In order to leave the cruise, you must kill someone. The method does not matter- poisoning, bludgeoning, stabbing, strangling… As long as your victim is dead, you can leave.” It huffed once again, dissatisfied. “MonoWyrm, there was no need to interrupt me. I was going to explain.” It muttered. MonoWyrm giggled, like it didn’t care what happened to the others. “Well, you were going so slow, I couldn’t help but jump in, you know? Hurry it up next time!” It argued.
Among the anxious, fearful shouts of those who not so long ago had seemed relatively fine, I noticed Kaguya in particular step up to the dragons, a determined look on her face. The dragons took notice, and MonoWyrm smiled maliciously. “Oh? You got a question, pretty pink princess?” It taunted. At the comment, Kaguya growled, and pointed towards the dragons. “I know not of your intentions of keeping us here, whether they be for entertainment or some grander purpose, but… I want no part in this. And from the sound of it, neither does anyone else.” She asserted. “Now, release us at once. I am not afraid of you. I can easily take you on.”
“Oho? What’s that? Could it be…” MonoWyrm mock gasped. “A challenge? GyahahahaHAAAAA!! Oh lord, I’ve been waiting for this! C’mon, Teruyo! Hit me with everything you got!” It moved into an attacking stance, snarling almost playfully. Carefully, Kaguya’s hand unfolded, her palm extended, furrowing her brow. She seemed to be focusing. I could have sworn I saw a ball of light come from her fingers.
“Last Word… HOURAI’S SEA OF TREES!”
Suddenly there was a brilliant flash of lights, and…
…
Nothing happened.
I’m guessing she was trying to cast some sort of spell, but by the mortified look on her face, it failed. She backed up then, stammering, “It should have worked…” She looked at her hands, disturbed, as MonoWyrm cackled wildly. “GyahahahaHAAAAA!! Looks like the magic show is over, your majesty! Now, you mind if I show a trick of my own?” It laughed. It then pointed towards MonoDraco. “MonoDraco! Light ‘em up!”
On cue, I felt a blast of pure heat blow in front of my face. Instinctively, I closed my eyes and turned away, but when I looked back…
Kaguya was on fire.
Her ear-piercing scream echoed throughout the ship, as the smell of crackling fire and burning skin entered my nostrils. I could see her reeling in pain, begging to be saved. But no one came to her. We all were screaming just as loud.
“What the HELL?!” I heard Len screech behind me. “Oh no, no, no, no…” Croissant muttered next to me, seeming to have a panic attack. I didn’t know what to do. My entire body was yelling at me, “do something before she dies”, but what was I supposed to do? Jump in? I’d die too. I’m not a firefighter. I couldn’t save her even if I tried. I couldn’t believe what was happening. It couldn’t be real. It just couldn’t.
I refuse to believe it.
“Alright, that’s enough of that.” MonoDraco stated simply, turning to MonoWyrm as if there wasn’t a girl set ablaze in front of them, still begging for help. “Put her out. She was merely an example.” MonoWyrm sighed, pouting a bit. “Boo… I wanted her to die! But whatever you say...” It huffed. There was another blast, this time ice cold, and before I knew it, the fire had been put out, and Kaguya was soaking wet with water. It didn’t change the fact that she was set on fire in front of me. She took in shallow, empty breaths, panting in fear. I could see the terror in her eyes.
It was then that I felt an amount of fear that I had never felt before. I could my heart beating- no, pounding in my chest, as if it was going to burst out at any moment. Please, just let this be an extremely elaborate nightmare. Please, please, I’m begging. But there was no logic behind a stupid hope like that. This was real. All of this was real, wasn’t it?
It… was all real.
…
…No, Ringo, you CANNOT faint right here! You still have to make it back to your suite at least! You have to find out how to leave! Right?! I… I can’t throw in the towel just yet. I attempted to take in deep breaths, but each inhale was forced and each exhale came out shaky. I… I have to think logically. If… If I react too strongly, I’ll do something stupid, and…
“Now do you all understand? This isn’t a joke! This is real!”MonoWyrm explained. “This killing game will go on for as long as we like, and I’m personally looking forward to the carnage! Gyahahaha! Well then, that’s all the time that we have for today!” It turned promptly, about to walk away to who knows where with MonoDraco, but before it could finish, its head tilted towards us, a slasher smile across its face. I could feel my body go cold from the shiver I got down my spine.
“Gyahaha… I’m looking forward to getting to know you all.”
With that, it bounded off to somewhere out of my sight.
…
The rest of the night was a blur, I think.
By the time MonoWyrm and MonoDraco had finished their opening speech and… everything involved with it… It was already nighttime. Some of the older members of the group decided to help the others with getting to the suites, and I could have sworn when I was in the elevator, Len said he’d be going back to help Kaguya.
Kaguya…
I’ll never forget her horrified face when the flames engulfed her body. It was unlike anything I’d seen before. That’s something that you’ll always remember, no matter how much you try to forget. Even now, the smell of her burning clothes still lingers. It doesn’t matter if she lived. It doesn’t matter if I heard her heavy breathing after the fire was put out. It doesn’t matter if I heard Len outside my suite helping her to her room. It won’t ever change what I saw.
I know I have to stay strong and find a way to leave without killing anyone, but… It’s so hard. How do you even stay positive in a situation like this? When the people you’ve become friends with could kill you at any time? When you lying down and not waking up tomorrow is a real possibility? Is it even possible? I don’t think it is. Probably.
Even if everything else was a blur, I remember going back into my suite and lying down on my bed, at least. Despite the reality of the situation, I still had a stupid hope in the back of my mind saying that it might all be a dream. When I wake up, none of it will have ever happened. That’s what I would like to believe. After that, anyone would gladly believe that, even if it was a hope of delusion. But… I knew it was real.
Nothing could change that.
But I wish something could.
~ PROLOGUE END ~
Currently Alive: 16
Currently Dead: 0
Story Parts Completed: 1
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~ TO BE CONTINUED ~