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Kissing is so strange, if you think about it. Consider this: at what point did the human race decide pressing your mouth against someone else’s in a pucker would be a sign of affection? It doesn’t make any sense. Other animals don’t kiss; they court, they mate, the cute ones might even cuddle. But the gesture of a kiss is entirely lost on them.
“They’re going to be lost on you too if you don’t shut up,” Eren snaps, pulling back from Jean’s neck to glare at him. “Who talks in the middle of making out with someone anyway?”
“At least I don’t bite the person I’m making out with!” comes Jean’s sharp retort. He pulls his lip between his teeth to worry his injured lip; he finds the sting strangely pleasant, though he’s not about to tell Eren. “Who even taught you how to kiss anyway, a horse?”
Eren’s already flushed face turns crimson, and he punches Jean in the shoulder. “Shut up, asshole!” he half yells, the noise echoing in the empty barracks. “I haven’t ever kissed anyone besides you so give me a break!”
“I’ve never kissed anyone else either but you don’t see me trying to eat your lips!”
“Well, it’s hard!” Eren complains, brow scrunching, and Jean only just resists the urge to lean forward and kiss the wrinkles away. “I’m not used to using my lips and my teeth and my tongue for something except eating, and you bite things when you eat so…” He makes a vague gesture with one hand, the other coming up to hold the back of Jean’s neck. “So stop teasing me or I’m just gonna leave and I’ll tell everyone you were such a horrible kisser it felt like I was getting eaten by a Titan!”
“Oh, sure; I’m the one that kisses like a Titan,” Jean snorts. A small part of his brain is telling him he should be very miffed by this comparison, and that he should leave first and tell everyone that Eren kisses like a Titan, but the rest of it is panicking at the thought of Eren leaving because the kissing wasn’t all that bad and Jean was actually rather enjoying himself so Eren needs to stay put.
“You’re such a jerk,” Eren grumbles, moving closer to Jean’s face to better glower at him, and Jean takes the opportunity to press their lips together. Eren jerks, but he doesn’t move, and the hand on the back of Jean’s neck tightens its grip, so Jean counts that as a victory. After a few seconds, he pulls back just far enough to lean in again like he’s seen Bertholdt and Reiner doing, because Bertholdt seems to like it when Reiner does it so Eren should like it too, Jean thinks. Jean hopes.
But Eren must, because the next time Jean leans in, Eren does too and oh, Jean thinks, no wonder Bertholdt made that noise when he and Reiner were kissing; this feels good when you do it right. Great, even. Fantastic, maybe. Jean’s not sure if he’s willing to give Eren that much credit.
Jean’s not entirely sure at what point he ended up on his back with Eren on top of him, still kissing, but the weight and the warmth of Eren’s body feels right against his, and even though Jean kind of resents being underneath Eren, he finds himself too comfortable to want to move. He slides one hand up the back of Eren’s shirt instead, tracing fingers up his spine, rewarded when Eren shivers.
Jean grins, and Eren must feel it through the kiss because he breaks off to glare at Jean again. “Don’t get cocky,” he warns, and Jean wonders if that was supposed to be a joke, before the wonderful new feeling of Eren pressing little kisses against his jaw sidetracks his mind. Are jaws supposed to be this sensitive, Jean wonders as his hand falters to a stop midway up Eren’s back? He’s fairly certain his jaw has never been able to process this much sensation before.
Eren’s lips twitch against his skin, and Jean can tell it’s a smirk and oh, Eren thinks he’s so great? Whatever; Jean can do anything Eren can and he’ll prove it. He slides his other hand up Eren’s back and flips them over, pleased by the site of Eren’s suddenly red and annoyed face. Jean smirks and moves his hands so they’re trailing up Eren’s stomach, and laughs when Eren sucks in a sharp breath.
“Stop being such a jerk!” Eren hisses, and before Jean can respond he’s lavishing kisses on Jean’s collarbones and Jean knows for a fact that those did not have the same amount of nerve endings before as they do now. He barely manages to bite back an embarrassing noise.
“You stop being a jerk!” he snaps, pulling away from those stupid kisses and smashing their lips together. Their teeth clack and Jean inhales in pain at the same time Eren opens his mouth to deliver a retort, and for the first time in his life Jean feels someone else’s tongue against his lips and it’s magnificent.
Eren seems to think so too, because when Jean pulls back in surprise he sees his own wide-eyed, open-mouthed expression mirrored on Eren’s face. They’re so still Jean can feel Eren’s heartbeat against his chest and a spark flare up inside him, something strange and raw and wonderful. Emboldened, Jean leans down and flick his tongue over Eren’s bottom lip, and Eren doesn’t quite succeed in stifling the same noise Jean almost made earlier. Jean wants to gloat, but he thinks doing so might make Eren leave and there’s no way Jean’s letting that happen now. So instead he flicks his tongue over Eren’s lips again and Eren makes another small noise and Jean thinks he understand why Bertholdt and Reiner are always sneaking off so much.
“Jean,” Eren breathes, and Jean isn’t sure if Eren meant to say it or if it was just a slip of his tongue, but Jean draws in a harsh breath and buries his face against Eren’s neck to hide how red he is. Something tells him to sink his teeth into the muscle there, so Jean does, just a little, and Eren’s whole body jerks in a way that makes Jean’s insides burn.
“Eren,” he murmurs against the skin, not having meant to but also not caring much that he did. Then Jean finds himself on his back, Eren looming over him, his eyes dark with the same emotion boiling over in Jean’s stomach, and he kisses Jean, the short kind of kisses they were exchanging before except he adds in a flick of tongue. Jean emits a noise he will never admit to having made later and lets his lips part against Eren’s kisses, just to see what will happen. It makes their tongues touch for the briefest of moments, and now Jean definitely understands why Bertholdt and Reiner are always sneaking off so much. Jean kind of wants to stay intertwined with Eren like this forever.
And then someone comes barging into the barracks, shattering the stillness around them, and Eren breaks away from Jean with a jolt. “Eren?” comes a girl’s voice, and the bottom of Jean’s stomach falls away into an endless abyss. “You weren’t at dinner. Is everything all right? Are you—“
Mikasa stops, the only indication of her surprise as she takes in the sight of Eren and Jean on Eren’s bed, Eren still on top of Jean. Neither of them say anything, only stare, Eren in surprise and Jean in abject horror.
Mikasa’s gaze narrows to just Jean. “You,” she says. “Outside. Now.”
She doesn’t look upset as she turns to leave the barracks, which makes Jean all the more terrified. He looks at Eren, expression beseeching him for help, but all Eren does is move off of Jean and shrug. “At least it was nice while it lasted,” he whispers. “Sorry you have to go like this, though.”
“I fucking hate you,” Jean hisses, and decides that if Mikasa doesn’t kill him, he is never making out with Eren again.
Probably.