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Tei walks into the room where the Buzz members are, fooling around a bit before the concert starts. He stands right by the door and watches as the antics of the five other guys unfold before him — Junki on the couch, zoned out; Woohyun entertaining Kyunghoon like a little sibling; Sunghee and Yejun having a serious conversation that Tei can’t hear from where he stands. Yejun, spotting Tei from the corner of his eye, turns his head to face him and then walks to him.
“Tei, you didn't have to come this early, you know.”
“It's alright, I didn't have a schedule at this time and I thought I'd swing by early. I could do my bit by being prepared early, couldn't I?” Tei replies.
“At this rate, you'll be ready before Kyunghoon,” Yejun replies, prompting both of them to look at what he indeed was in the midst of doing. Kyunghoon had his back towards them and was facing Woohyun. Woohyun, realising Tei's and Yejun's gazes on him, nudges Kyunghoon and tells him something softly. All of a sudden, Kyunghoon's warming up becomes the loudest voice in the room, and now everyone in the room is looking at him.
“He's got a good voice.” Yejun remarks.
“Yeah, it is sometimes surprising to hear that voice when he sings, because there's not a hint of his speaking voice in it.”
Tei has his eyes on Kyunghoon, who feels that glance and snaps his neck around. “Tei-hyung!”
“I’ve been standing here all this time and you only see me now.” Tei replies. “I thought you’d only see me on stage and not once before.”
“Hyung,” Kyunghoon drags out his words, “you know I really didn’t know you were standing there, you were so quiet, we’re noisy when we’re by ourselves. Anyways,” he gets up and goes to Tei, “Are you ready?”
“You’re asking me? Kyunghoon, it’s your concert. It’s a Buzz concert. I’ll do my best, but it’s you who has to shine on stage there. I’ll do my bit and that’s alright. You. Are you ready?”
“I guess? Hyung, if I didn’t seem prepared enough, I’d have them,” Kyunghoon points with his chin to the other Buzz members while still looking at Tei, “behind my back. You don’t know how annoying they are.” He continues with a joking tone.
“You called, Kyunghoon?” Junki asks, interrupting the conversation.
“He didn’t, but he was badmouthing you, goodness. I had to stop him otherwise he’d just go on, you know.” Tei answers, words dripping with sarcasm.
“Kyunghoon?” Woohyun looks at them with an equally sarcastic offended face. Yejun tells him to, “just let them be, you know how they are,” in his characteristic dry-cut tone.
Tei chuckles while watching this, and then looks at Kyunghoon. His focus is on his hyungs. As if Tei’s gaze was physical, Kyunghoon snaps back to face him.
“Hyung. Thank you for coming.”
“What are you being thankful for? I should be thankful that you’ve invited me for your concert. It’s your milestone. You’ve got to celebrate it.”
“Hyung, we’ve run into each other so many times, let’s have fun together this way too.”
“Alright, but don’t mess up the lyrics like last time. That was horrendous.”
Kyunghoon laughs, eyes folding into crescents. “No promises.”
✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧
“Wow, Kyunghoon. What outfit is that?”
Tei asks with a surprised laugh as he watches Kyunghoon walk into his green room.
“What’s wrong with it?” Kyunghoon asks back, looking down at his seemingly normal set of clothes on him.
“There’s nothing wrong with it, but darker outfits are more often associated with you because of ballads, rather than these… white pants.”
“You’re very observant.” Kyunghoon replies. “Yeah, it’s the concept I’m going for with this album. This time it’s much lighter, very summery, if you could say. Couldn’t be wearing dark clothes and singing bright songs, or that would be a terrible mismatch.”
Tei hums in agreement. “Yeah, makes sense. I thought you were going to be stuck in sombre colours forever.” Kyunghoon shrugs. “Do you want to practice one more time, Kyunghoon?”
“I think we're good, hyung. We've done duets stages before—”
“For goodness sake, Kyunghoon, that was years ago.”
“—and those went well. Without a hitch, in fact. Down to the practice runs.”
“What do you want to say?”
“What I'm implying is that we'll do well. I got the lyrics, I know where your parts end and mine start.”
Tei contemplates. “Are you sure about it?”
“Hyung, at the very least, I know my parts. I won't mess that up, and I don't see a problem.”
“Alright, I can agree with that,” Tei says, with a tiny bit of objection in his tone. “You do justice to your lines, I'll do to mine, there's no reason it shouldn't go well.”
“Exactly,” Kyunghoon says, proud in his ability to slip away from another round of practice (that he wholeheartedly believed they didn't need).
A moment of quiet passes between, and Kyunghoon realises. It's been years since he's seen Tei. A wave of realisation hits him. So much had happened to Kyunghoon before this day— a whirlpool of emotions, blurred by the bright computer screen and the countless soju bottles. Yet Tei remains just as close to him, constantly being his support, even if Kyunghoon had locked himself away from the world for a while.
Tei was there. Tei is still here.
“Hyung.”
Tei quits his absent gaze and turns sharply towards Kyunghoon. “Yeah?”
“Thank you.”
“For what? For this stage? You know it was the producer’s idea. I wasn't the only one planning for this.”
“I know, but still.”
Kyunghoon is thankful for more than just a shared stage, but he hopes his stare, as he looks at Tei's eyes, conveys the unspoken.
✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧
The sun is bearing down as Kyunghoon struggles to look straight ahead. Placing his palm over his eyes as a makeshift shield from the rays, he sees a multitude of men, clad in military attire, standing and watching the stage. Kyunghoon looks up at the elevated platform from the backstage. Tei is singing his lungs out (as he does), and Kyunghoon feels proud. Just a few months back, on his suggestion, Tei was roped into the military band. That was one good decision.
In his military seniority, Kyunghoon squints his eyes as he scans the audience to gauge their moods. Some stood like statues, clearly waiting for the girl groups; while some were, with their hands on their chests, belting out the lyrics like heartbroken lovers. He listens to Tei's singing as the song is nearing its end. His set is nearly done, Kyunghoon knows, and he puffs his cheeks and buzzes his lips to loosen his throat.
The song ends with cheers, and Kyunghoon watches Tei as he leaves the stage and climbs the short flight of stairs towards him. There's a pleased expression on Tei's face.
“That's not bad, wasn't it?” Tei remarks.
“I'd say so. It's not easy to get that sort of response as a male singer.”
“So I've heard. It wasn't radio silence out there.”
Kyunghoon smiles. “Good job, hyung.”
Tei wears a proud face as he huffs out a breath, then sees Kyunghoon's smile turn into a smirk. Not a subtle one, but one so clear, with a raised eyebrow and a crazy glint in his eyes.
“Hyung.”
“Yes?”
Kyunghoon takes a breath before he, Tei assumes, starts laughing at his own untold joke. “Thank you for opening for me.”
Tei rolls his eyes. “Yes, it was an honour to open for my senior.” He replies with arms by his side, sarcasm heavy in every word.
As the host on the stage introduces Kyunghoon as the next singer, he takes a step towards the stage. With shoulders barely touching, he whispers slyly into Tei's ear, “Now watch this,” as he climbs the stairs while the instrumentals for Thorn start playing.
Tei turns back to face the stage as he hears an enormous roar from the audience.
✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧
Tei wipes down the counter mindlessly as he looks over the silhouette of the only person in his restaurant after closing hours. Hunched over the table, one arm stretched out and hanging simply off the edge of the table.
“Long day?” Tei asks, breaking the silence.
The figure in the dark shifts, then lets out a sigh. “Yeah, not a good day either.” The reply is drawn out.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Tei asks, taking off his apron. “You know you don't if you don't want to.”
“Uhh,” Kyunghoon groans, “I don't know. I don't know what I want to do.”
Tei approaches the table Kyunghoon was seated by. The clinks of the soju bottle and two shot glasses being placed on the table surprises Kyunghoon and he pulls himself up.
“Just for tonight. It's alright. I can keep you company for a while.” Tei remarks, a reply to the question on Kyunghoon's face.
Tei pulls a chair back and sits on it. The two of them stare blankly into the street. The streetlights dimly light the interior of the restaurant, which had otherwise most lights switched off. Even at this late hour, cars on the streets still run and people walk to their destinations, though most had already retired to their homes.
Tei looks at Kyunghoon. Slumped into his chair, one arm rested on the table, the other mindlessly tapping his thigh. His expressions were masked by the general exhaustion that didn’t shy in making itself known.
“Hyung,” Kyunghoon starts, while still looking straight.
“Yeah?”
Tei watches as Kyunghoon's lips tremble, as if searching for words. “Nothing.” is what he comes up with.
“You know, Kyunghoon, we've got bad days and good days. It's easy to think that if one day is bad, then it's like the universe has an agenda against you. But it isn't like that. That's just coincidence after coincidence. Even in this restaurant, there were problems after problems initially. It bothered me for a while, you know? I've told you, problems with contractors, with material, with the ingredients. I thought I wouldn't see the end of this.”
He takes a breath to pace his words. “But each day, somehow, things kept changing. Sometimes for the better, sometimes not so. I kept trying. That brings me to where I am now. I'm just thankful everything unfolded the way it had to.”
Kyunghoon turns to him.
“Im just saying, Kyunghoon, that sometimes it's just one thing after another, and that's it.”
Kyunghoon sighs. “Maybe that is all there is to it, but it feels like there's a huge weight on me.”
Tei opens the bottle and pours Kyunghoon a shot. “Yeah, usually the negative lingers a lot.” He replies, pouring himself one.
Kyunghoon takes the glass, clinks it against Tei's, and downs it. “Recording didn't go well. I know what I was supposed to do, but in that room… I don't know, it didn’t feel right today. Nothing really came out of it.”
“And now you know what you should be doing.” Tei interrupts, softer.
“I guess, yeah. And then the broadcast filming. I think the morning messed up my mood and the disappointment carried over. I don't think that went well either.” Kyunghoon continues, now turning to Tei. He pours himself some soju.
Tei mirrors his posture. “That's how variety shows work. You know it. Some days, you really take off, while other days, you're just not in your element. Happens to the best of us.”
“You're right. I think I've been overthinking. A lot.”
“Kyunghoon,” Tei calls him. Kyunghoon’s eyes follow him. Tei's voice had concern written in it. “I know you take these personally, but sometimes, it doesn't have to be. It's alright to forget it. Don't let it weigh you down.”
Kyunghoon nods wordlessly as a reflex.
“And how did the event go?”
Kyunghoon blinks. “How did you know I had one?”
“You're not one to go out in a leather jacket on your off days. That outfit’s definitely arranged by your stylist.”
“You know me too well, hyung. I can barely keep a secret about myself without you noticing.”
“You're just as observant. It's only that today, you're in the spotlight.”
Kyunghoon rolls his eyes. “Fine, hyung. As you say. About the event, I definitely could've done better, but now—”
“You know how you can improve.”
“I know how I can improve.” Kyunghoon mimics Tei’s tone.
Tei smiles, content. “There you go, that's so much better.”
“I should come here often after closing hours.”
“This soju,” Tei rattles his shot glasses against the bottle, “I've placed it on your tab. Pay for it next time you're here, and,” Tei emphasises, “before closing.”
“Sure, hyung, as you say.” Kyunghoon replies, taking another shot.
A comfortable wave of silence moves between them. That's the thing about them. They don't need words, even the quiet suffices.
“Tei-hyung.” Kyunghoon speaks up.
Tei looks at Kyunghoon attentively.
“Thank you for being there for me.” Kyunghoon's words drag into a drawl.
“Alright, now you're getting drunk already, let's get you home.” He announces, getting off his chair and walking to Kyunghoon's side. “Anytime, Kyunghoon. I'm always there for you.”
✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧ ✦ ✧
The campfire crackles, sending embers into the clear night sky. Kyunghoon tends to the fire, poking it with another piece of firewood to keep it burning. Tei stares blankly at the fire, absentmindedly tracing the rim of his mug.
“It’s nice and warm,” Tei remarks, stretching further into his camping chair. “The fire’s strong enough.”
Kyunghoon pulls back from the fire and settles into his chair. The heat from the fire dispels the sharp edge of the icy mountain air and wraps them in a blanket of warmth and comfort.
“The view’s nice,” Kyunghoon mumbles, looking at the sky dotted with stars. He reaches for his phone and clicks a series of pictures. A picture of the campfire, of the night view, a selfie of himself.
“Tei hyung.” Kyunghoon calls.
Tei blinks, startled, and turns towards Kyunghoon, finding Kyunghoon’s phone raised. In the little screen, Kyunghoon’s facial features, illuminated by the fire, are clear, contrasted by the dim camping ground around them.
“You’re not in the frame,” Kyunghoon turns his head back to Tei. They shuffle their chairs a little towards the other, displacing the gravel under their chairs.
Kyunghoon counts down before he clicks. Tei puts on his widest smile, as does Kyunghoon. He takes a closer look at the picture, then smiles.
“Are the pictures good?” Tei asks.
Kyunghoon hums, still looking at his phone screen.
“Send me the pictures. I want to see them too.”
The night goes on, quiet, while the two settle into another bout of comfortable silence.
Kyunghoon stretches, then stands. “Goodness, I am so full, it’s like I’ve got ramyeon all the way up to my neck.”
“You know you didn’t have to keep up to how much I was planning on eating.”
“Yeah, I kinda forgot how much you eat. It was all very delicious though.”
“Did you forget I run a restaurant?”
“Oh yes, the restaurant!” Kyunghoon replies, feigning realisation. “You’re the owner of such a popular restaurant, the food by the chef is bound to be delectable!” He emphasises every other word.
They settle into small talk, as the night grows deeper. Conversations flow naturally, even if it has been a while since they had last spoken to each other. Tei laughs at Kyunghoon’s exaggerated anecdotes from his camping trips; Kyunghoon listening to Tei’s experiences at musicals— it’s like time never lapses between them.
As another strand of their conversations quietly comes to an end, Kyunghoon comments. “It’s getting late; let’s get up and sleep. We’ve got to wake up early tomorrow to see the sunrise.”
Tei interrupts him. “Kyunghoon.”
Kyunghoon turns around. Tei looks at him, a meaningful gaze in his eyes.
A subtle pause in the conversation.
“Thank you, Kyunghoon.”
Kyunghoon returns a confused look. Tei could see the gears turn in his head. “For suggesting this hike? Hyung. You were the one wanting to come here.”
“No.”
No? Then… what? Kyunghoon ponders.
“Thank you for being my friend. Kyunghoon. For being with me all these years. For letting yourself be a phone call away.”
Kyunghoon, more confused than before, furrows his eyebrows. Tei’s gaze remains unwavering.
“I’ve always counted on you, and you’ve always been there for me. I know you’re not one to make friends easily. Yet, the fact that you’ve opened up to me…” Tei trails off for a moment, reading Kyunghoon’s expression. “Kyunghoon, I just want you to know –You’re just as important to me.”
“Hyung,” Kyunghoon murmurs, half touched by whatever Tei had just said, half in a sleepy state.
“You know what?” Tei replies, planting his hands on the arms of the chair as he gets up, “Let’s go to sleep. It’s getting late.” He moves to Kyunghoon, throws one arm over his shoulder, and together they move to the tents. The fire flickers behind them, casting long shadows on the campsite.
The words of gratitude settle between them, needing no further explanation. Tei stops over at his tent, and watches Kyunghoon make his way to his own. Crouching over near the entrance of his tent, he feels the cold mountain breeze brush his face, and he calls softly.
“Good night, Kyunghoon.”
“Good night, hyung.”