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In the woods there was an abandoned home that nobody knew even existed, nobody but Travis and Sean, and they had taken a liking to this small rundown home. One side of the house had a major hole in the wall, rats and a variety of different insects crawled up through the floor boards. Half the staircase leading upstairs was gone but still, despite the conditions of this place it was all the two could call home.
Sean was currently sprawled out on a mattress covered in stains from who knows what and partially from him and Travis. He wasn't doing anything, just staring at the cracked ceiling that would someday crush them possibly, preferably? Sean wasn't sure. Travis was standing by a window that was half shattered while smoking a cigarette and coughing up a storm every couple of seconds, occasionally hacking up spit that he aimed out the window. He put his cigarette out on the side of the wall before heading over to Sean and sitting down near his feet on the mattress.
“I'm having fucking withdrawals again” he sniffed.
His voice was crackly and rough from all the shit he'd breathed in and consumed over the years, and the yelling, can't forget that. Sean turned his head to look at Travis, his face was all dirty, probably from him passing out in the dirt again, his eyes were irritated and he definitely needed some sleep because his lazy eye was being lazier than usual.
“How bad?” Sean asked, his voice low and tired.
He already knew the answer, bad, because any withdrawals Travis had sucked. Travis leaned down, half his body on the floor while the other half was resting on Sean's legs.
“Pretty bad” he mumbled, pushing his cheek into the front of Sean's jeans. He knew where this was going now.
“Hm” Sean hummed, waiting for Travis to just say what he needed.
Travis's fingers hooked on the edge of Sean's jeans and tugged a little.
“Can we fuck?” He finally asked.
Sean sighed, trying his best to hide how exhausted he was. His dick was hurting from how much sex they'd been having, it was the only thing to keep Travis's mind off his addictions. It was one of Sean's ideas to help out and it's what worked for Travis. The only problem with this was that it tired Sean out, it wasn't that he didn't enjoy it, even though Travis could get a little too rough at times, it was just that it tired him out.
“My dick hurts,” Sean mumbled, lifting his head to look down at Travis who was now palming him through his jeans.
“I'll make it feel better,” Travis said, voice low.
Sean moved his hand down to rest his fingers in Travis's blonde hair that was growing out a horrible buzz cut.
“yeah?” he replied.
Travis nodded and pressed a kiss to Sean's pants. Sean smiled, something small and barely there and then adjusted himself so he was now leaning back on his forearms.
“Okay, just go easy,” he said.
Travis nodded excitedly and began to take his shorts off, pulling his tank top off after. Travis went back to the position he was in before and undid Sean's jeans, tugging them down until they were halfway down his thigh. Sean watched Travis as he moved slowly, he still wasn't hard yet. Travis fingers curled around the fabric of Sean's underwear and pulled them down, his face falling sadly when he saw Sean was still soft. Sean knew what was going through Travis's head, he was probably thinking that Sean thought that he was ugly. Travis had always struggled with his body image, his father had completely destroyed any confidence he had as early as possible. His biggest insecurity was his lazy eye, it was the first thing everyone noticed and he could see the way they'd hold back a laugh, knew that once he walked away they would make some joke about it. His second biggest insecurity was his teeth. They were all yellow and crooked, a big gap between the two front teeth and missing tooth on the bottom, also easily noticeable and he could tell when it disgusted people. Sean knew that Travis wasn't exactly considered handsome by the general public, but it was his imperfections that Sean had found beautiful, and who was Sean to judge when he himself wasn't exactly in the best conditions either.
“You're not hard,” Travis said, voice soft and sad.
Sean reached out, placing his hand on Travis's cheek.
“I know, but it's not because of you, we've just been going at it quite often so I'm not as sensitive.” He explained.
Travis nodded but it was clear he didn't fully believe Sean.
“Want me to close my eyes?” Travis asked.
Sean frowned, he hated when Travis did that, tried to cover up his imperfections in hopes that Sean would like him more.
“What? No, come here” Sean pat his chest, signalling for Travis to move up.
Travis moved up till he was looking down at Sean.
“It's not you, and don't go covering your eyes, I think your eyes are beautiful. Fuck everyone else, okay? Who cares what they say?” He exclaimed.
Travis nodded, “okay” was all he said before moving back down.
Travis sat down on Sean's dick and began to move back and forth to create friction. Sean felt that small spark but it wouldn't be enough. He looked at Travis and pictured him wearing his makeup and one of those ugly dresses he thrifted, he knew it was fucked up, at least in a way. Travis liked dressing feminine sometimes, always saying it made him feel better but that he wasn't a woman, but he also wasn't a man or anything in between, he just was. He still used masculine pronouns and called himself a man but wouldn't care if someone had slipped up and called him something else. “It's confusing” is how Travis had always explained it. Sean, growing up gay in an extremely homophobic household, had grown to hate being gay. With time he was slowly getting over these feelings but still, he had some issues, one of them was sex. He found it hard to allow himself to enjoy it, always made him feel guilty and whenever Travis wore his feminine clothing or makeup it made things a little easier for Sean. He knew it was wrong in a way but that wasn't something he was ready to acknowledge fully.
Thinking of Travis in this way was working, as Travis kept grinding on his dick he was beginning to get hard.
“There you go,” Travis whispered.
Travis placed his hand on Sean's stomach as he began to squirm a little beneath him and Sean's hand moved down to rest onto it.
“What do you want to do?” Travis asked.
Sean bit his lip and tilted his head back a little as he watched how hard Travis was and how he was leaking onto his stomach.
“Whatever you want,” Sean breathed out.
Travis nodded and began to move himself so he was standing on his knees over Sean, he took Sean's cock in his hand and rubbed his thumb over it a couple times causing Sean to whine.
“Fuck Trav” he moaned.
Travis smiled and grabbed his own dick and began rubbing it against Sean's, causing their precum to mix at the tip.
“I'm gonna sit on your dick” Travis grinned.
Sean nodded and closed his eyes for a second “need me to ease you in?” Sean asked.
Travis shook his head, they'd been so active recently that working up to it was no longer needed.
“No, don't worry about it, okay?” Travis swallowed hard and watched as Travis lined Sean's cock up with his hole until finally sliding down, his ass swallowing up his whole dick. One of Sean's hands reached up to grab at the top of the mattress.
Travis moaned loudly, “holy shit” he put both hands on Sean's hips.
Sean could already feel Travis clenching around him and it felt like heaven. Sean reached for his pack of cigarettes and pulled one out and brought it to his lips, then he reached for his match box and struck a match against the container, he lit the cigarette and breathed out a deep sigh. Travis smiled wildly at the sight and began to move himself up and down, his bottom lip being clenched between his teeth at every move. Sean's empty hand moves down to squeeze Travis's skinny, pale thigh.
“you're so good,” he said, his eyes hooded as he looked up at Travis.
Travis bit his lip to hold back an insane smile. He loved being told how good he was, that he was doing an excellent job. Fuck his dad for saying he was shitty at everything, he was sure good at making Sean cum.
“I'm good?” He responded, voice heavy and uneven as he moved up and down faster.
“Of course, you're my good boy” Sean hummed and took the cigarette and put it between Travis's lips.
That was it, this is what Travis needed, a cigarette, his boyfriends dick deep inside of him and being told he was a good boy. He could cum right now on the spot, but he wouldn't, not yet, he needed to hold off just a little bit longer.
Sean's chest rose and fell quickly and he began to whine as he became sensitive.
“Travis, Jesus- slow down baby or you'll cramp up” Sean managed to get out between heavy breaths.
Travis didn't slow down though, he pushed himself further and slammed down faster and harder and he felt that tense feelings growing in his stomach.
"Sean, are you close?” He asked, voice high pitched.
“Yeah” Sean squeezed his eyes shut as the feeling became too much, but Travis suddenly stopped moving and began to jerk himself off.
The cigarette between his lips falling on Sean's stomach and stinging his skin, he brushed it away with a wince and tried to push his hips up to get some sort of friction to cum. Travis, such a fucking asshole at times. Sean watched as Travis came all over his stomach, white strings shooting onto his chest and it only made his own cock hurt more inside of Travis.
Sean frowned as Travis got off of him. As Travis laid back on the mattress Sean sat up and turned his back to him and began to jerk himself off.
“Such an asshole” he mumbled and bit his lip before coming into his hand hard.
He wiped his hand off onto the mattress and turned back to Travis.
“The fuck trav!” He said angrily.
This wasn't the first time this happened, Travis losing control and only letting himself finish. Travis looked at Sean.
“I'm sorry, I just felt so good and my legs were cramping up so…”
Sean shook his head.
“Thats why I told you to slow down” he laid back down next to Travis and looked down at his stomach where the cigarette fell and burnt him.
“I'm sorry,” Travis said again, his voice softer now but Sean didn't care, this would surely happen again.
“Sean come on” Travis said, voice quieter.
He moved so he was above Sean again, he stared down at Sean's stomach and chest that was covered in his cum. He reached for Sean's hand and took his fingers, placing each one in his mouth and sucked each one slowly, tasting the salt from Sean's own release.
“I'm sorry, I should've continued,” he said, this time actually sounding sincere.
Sean knew that sometimes Travis didn't think straight and would do stupid shit, this being one of them, it made him mad but he knew this was just something Travis needed to work on.
“It's not okay, and you gotta learn to stop doing that, okay?”
Travis's bottom lip quivered just like it always did when he did something wrong.
“Hey…” Sean pulled Travis down closer to him.
“Look, it was a stupid thing to do but we can move past that okay?” He brushed his lips against Travis's cheek.
“I'm sorry” Travis repeated.
“I know, I still love you though” Sean pressed a gentle kiss to Travis's lips.
Travis pushed his head further into Sean's neck and swallowed hard.
“I'll do better next time,” he whispered.
Sean nodded and rubbed his back.
“Wait here, okay?” Sean pulled his underwear back up and grabbed a cloth.
He walked outside, the sun was hot on his skin. There was a small water pump outside, he pushed down the lever and watched as the towel soaked up water. He squeezed some out and headed back into the old house. He kneeled down and wiped Travis down, cleaning all the sweat and cum off his body, afterwards cleaning his own while Travis watched. He tossed the towel to the side of the room.
“All good,” he said.
Travis sat up and began to pick at his nails.
“Sean, I'm still sorry” he mumbled, avoiding looking at Sean's face.
Sean sighed and shook his head “it's okay, you already apologized” he said.
“I know, I'm sorry” he repeated.
“Trav, stop apologizing”
Travis bit his lip.
“Sorry…” he said quietly.
Sean put his hand over Travis's to stop him from picking at his nails.
“Travis”
“bad habit, I know” he nodded and looked at Sean.
Sean put his other hand on his cheek and rubbed circles with his thumb and then leaned in to kiss Travis.
“You're tired” Sean said, he wasn't sure if it was a question or a statement.
Travis shrugged and laid back down on the mattress, Sean following his movement.
“Let's go to sleep, alright? Tomorrow we gotta go into town and grab some food. It's been two days since we last ate and everytime I smoke I feel like puking” Sean chuckled.
Travis smiled and leaned into Sean who wrapped his arms around him.
“We're okay, we're gonna be fine” he said, Sean always said that every night but nothing ever changed.
Sean's was still Sean and Travis was still Travis and the world stayed fucked up, all of which got worse with time. Sean watched as Travis closed his eyes and his breathing getting lighter, he kissed his forehead and dozed off too.