Chapter Text
lily has been apart of the special air support unit for coming up on 3 years. she was invited to join task force 141 to help with a recon mission. they needed some extra hands, and lily has a colorful track record and reputation. the mission went by swimmingly, they had their ups and downs of course, like any other mission, but it was over. due to that success, she stayed in task force 141, and it helped that she got along with the other members of the task force. being the only woman on the team, while annoying at times, had its perks. her dorm was separated from everyone else, so she didn't have to hear any snoring through the thin walls, and she had your own bathroom. she didn't mind showering with other women, but showering alone was arguably better.
but now, she was coming up on 10 years in the military. she was starting to feel like she wanted to do something else with her life- when she joined, it was mostly on a whim. she finished high school with no plans, no college picked out, no dream job. while all of her peers were moving into their freshmen dorms, she felt empty. she had no real work experience from high school, while she was grateful that she had parents that didn't mind, she was getting rejected from jobs left and right. so, at 2 am on a random tuesday (technically wednesday) she filled out an army aplication. and that was it, she was now as good as government property, if she made it through boot camp, that is.
but she did, and she got even farther than she had ever thought. but what now? does she really want to live this stressfull life forever? does she constantly want to think about the "what-has-beens"? the "what ifs?". so here she sat. her reinlistment papers sat on her desk, her pen in hand. all she had to do was sign it, and the next 5 years of her life were thought out for her. did she want that still? sure, it was easy. waking up every morning to your day planned out, down to the minuite.
there was a knock on her door, pulling her from her thoughts. "yeah?" she answered. "price wants us in his office in 10." the voice belonged to a gruff scottish man, the jokester of the task force, johnny. he was a good lad, always down for a pint after a long, hard day. "heard!" lily called out, but there was no answer, the sound of boots already receding down the long hallway. price probably wanted to go over the mission you went on the previous night. it was a simple mission, go in, find some stolen weapons, get out. the retreival was done by someone else, another cog in the machine. the idea of a breifing about such a simple mission made her laugh, no one died, hell no weapons were fired at all, but it was protocall. it was all starting to feel a bit repetitive to her, breif about what you're going to do before you get there, do exactly that to a t, and then breif about what happened when you get back. she understood why it was necessary of course, but that doesn't mean she wasn't bored of it.
she sighed, took one last look at her reenlistment papers, and slammed the folder shut. she didn't have time to mull about this right now. she had to be ready for the breifing. so, she made sure everything was perfect, she made sure her tight bun had no fly-aways, that her shirt was tucked in all the was around, that her boot laces were tucked into her boots, all things she was sick of doing. she wanted to be free to express herself again, to wear whatever she wanted, to not have to care what her hair looked like, to not have her apperance have so much to do with her job.
once she triple checked that everything was perfect, she left her dorm and made her way to your captain's office. on the way, she bumped into kyle, the heart of the task force. he always hated it when there was conflict between your tight-knit group, he was always the one trying to get people to make up. it makes sense, whenever she sees him interact with his family, theyre all so in-tune with eachothers feelings. he does his best to get the rest of the group to talk about feelings like this, but so far he has been unsuccessful. feelings and the military dont usually mesh well together. but, to his credit, he keeps the group together.
"so, johnny and i are going out for a pint later, to celebrate yesterday's win, care to join us?" kyle asks, as you both walk to price's office. "i'd never turn down a pint, but theres not really much to celebrate. we didn't really do much." lily responded.
"well, a small win is still a win, and isn't that what life is all about? celebrating the small wins?"
"whatever you say, philosipher."
they turn the corner, arriving at price's office. simon is already sitting inside, along with the captain, they seem to be chatting about knives, simon's showing off a new japanese blade he got, going on about the craftmanship. simon's the brood of the group. he's big and intimidating, but silent- and that's what scares people. no one would expect a man of his stature to walk around so effortlessly quiet. but hes also not one to make small talk. unless it's about weapons, he could go on about those all day. but nevertheless, it takes him a long time to warm up to people. it took him a good six months to trust lily- she provided some intel for a mission that no one else had thought about, and without her, the mission could have gone south, and could even have gotten someone killed. but, from that day on, he fully trusted her. he knew she could hold her own of course, but he trusts her with his life. as he does the rest of the group. but ever so slowly, he warmed up and let some of his personality show. lily knows, as do the others, that he's really just a big softie at heart. still a stone faced killer, of course, but he truly cares for this little "family" they have.
once everyone has arrived, the captain starts the breifing. he goes over the mundane details of yesterday's mission. the breifing drags on for almost an hour, lily's starting to think johnny might fall asleep. price isn't exactally a "boring" talker, he sounds like one of her old history teachers from high school, monotone, but still captivating in a way. he has this aura about him that draws people in, hes a natural born leader. he's just the kind of person that just feels like its the right thing to do, to do as he says. he's the rock of the group, lily swears she's heard johnny call him "dad" once or twice after a few too many drinks. captain price is the man to go to whenever advice is needed, or a good heart-to-heart. he's a good man, and lily's glad to have served the last three years under him.
after what feels like weeks, the breifing is finally over. lily stretches in her chair, bones cracking in releif. kyle is shaking johnny awake, that lazy oaf did end up falling asleep. lily shakes her head, laughing a little bit. there's still some time before their plans for drinks, so lily decides she'll spend her down time in the gym. at least this will give her a chance to think about those dreaded reenlisment papers again. or what she would even do when she gets out. she feels 18 again, like she's alone in her room late at night, wondering about her future.
she makes her way to the gym, spending the next several hours in her mindless routine- execpt that her brain is going into a thousand directions, all the different possibilities. but the time passes, and now she's showered and changed, and has found herself at the pub thats near base. at least she's not alone, kyle and johnny are there of course, and it seems that johnny convinced simon to join them for their pint. although it wasn't just one pint.. there had been several, and maybe even a few shots of whisky. it seems kyle is really going big on his "small-wins" mantra.
so now lily finds herself at a pub, with 3 of her closest friends, a little drunk. well, a lot drunk actually. she should have stuck to one pint, she could not handle her alchohol at all. she would have a very unpleasant morning. good thing there was no morning pt. unfourtunatly for lily, she's also a drunk blabbermouth.
"cheers!" they chant in unison, all taking big gulps from their fresh pints. when they all slam their mugs back down on the table, lily lets something slip. something she wasnt meant to say, something she wasn't ready to discuss yet. something she hadn't even finished discussing with her own thoughts yet- "i'm thinking of leaving the military." the table goes silent.