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In rare contemplative moments after her death and resurrection (and how weird was that to just think that without question?) and death again, Kara wonders about everything.
If she’d met Lee first, would their love have been the uncomplicated and simple thing her relationship with Zak had been, or were she and Lee destined to have this thing, this thing that was both too powerful to deny and too powerful not to be terrifying. She thinks her life would have been VERY different if she’d met Lee first and didn’t have the specter of Zak’s death to close her heart to Lee’s unconditional love.
She wonders if she'd just had the courage to fail Zak, would he still have been alive, visiting his father on Galactica when the Cylons returned?
She thinks about Lee's uninhibited greeting when she came back from Caprica with the arrow, and wonders if she’d greeted him like that under the wing of her Viper after the end of the worlds, how quickly would they have both ended up in the brig for public violation of frat regs.
When he’d openly eyed her from face to waist and told her he’d be in the Pilots’ Ready Room, she wonders why she didn’t follow him and show him she was ecstatic to see him alive when she'd thought he was dead.
She wonders if the Cylons hadn’t frakked with her mind and her body, would she have been happy long enough to have Lee’s child? Would their child have looked like Kacey?
She wonders if she’d realized that her feelings for Sam were all about saving him and not about having him, how much more fun would her second time on a table with Lee have been?
Oh, the time the old Kara had wasted refusing to be real with the one person who could have saved her in so many ways if she'd just let him.
She wonders.