Chapter Text
Ellie had come back to Jackson after Santa Barbara. It was strange walking away from the farm, from everything she left behind she expected to feel something. But mostly, she felt numb. Dina leaving. Letting Abby live. It all spiraled in her chest like a storm she couldn't outrun, just quietly drowning in it. The familiar gates of Jackson stood ahead, tall and unmoving. Someone shouted from the towers
"You clean?!"
Ellie lifted her head just enough to nod. The gates creaked open, and the cold silence of the town swallowed her whole.
The moment she stepped in, it hit her.
The streets they walked. The smell of wood smoke. It clung to her like grief, and she looked down, not ready to face any of it. Not even ghosts.
She didn't know where else to go.
So she walked to Tommy's place.
Not to reconnect. Not for comfort.
She had to tell him the truth:
"I couldn't do it."
She stepped onto Tommy's porch and stared at the worn welcome mat, her boot scraping across it in hesitation. For a second, she almost turned around. But her hand rose and knocked—three short raps that sounded a lot more confident than she felt.
Shuffling came from inside.
Then the door creaked open.
"Ellie?"
His voice was surprised, but not warm. Just tired.
She looked up, and the numbness cracked—just enough for her throat to tighten, her vision to sting.
"Can I come in?"
Tommy didn't say anything at first. Just stepped aside.
They sat at the table across from each other, everything around them feeling too quiet. He handed her a glass of water, then eased himself into his seat with a soft groan, leaning his cane against the table.
His one eye stayed fixed on her.
"Did you do it?"
Ellie froze.
The question hit harder than expected—like she hadn't prepared for anyone to actually ask it out loud.
She shook her head slowly, eyes down.
Tommy's brow furrowed. His jaw clenched.
"What the hell does that mean?"
She looked up, eyes wet now, lips trembling slightly.
"I..."
The word felt like glass in her throat.
"I couldn't do it."
Silence fell between them.
Tommy leaned back in his chair, his face unreadable for a second—but his disappointment felt loud in the air between them. Not angry. Just... exhausted.
"So what? You came back thinkin' that's enough?"
Ellie flinched like she'd been slapped.
"And you just let her go? After everything she's done to us?!"
Tommy's voice rose sharp and bitter, his hand slamming the table hard enough to rattle the glass.
"After all we've lost, Ellie!"
She didn't look up. Couldn't.
Footsteps approached from down the hall, then a voice—
"Tommy, what the hell—?"
Maria stepped into the doorway, eyes narrowing in irritation—until she saw her.
Her breath caught in her throat. The irritation vanished, replaced with something softer. Something shocked.
"Ellie?"
Ellie looked up slowly, her fingers clenched tight in her lap, eyes glassy.
Maria didn't say anything at first. She just stared, taking her in. The shorter hair, the weight loss the missing fingers, the haunted expression that hadn't quite left Ellie's face since that day in the theater.
"You're back."
Ellie nodded.
Tommy scoffed and stood, wincing slightly as he grabbed his cane. The tension was thick.
"You think coming back fixes this? You think showing up like a damn stray dog makes it right?"
"Tommy—" Maria warned.
"No," he snapped. "She needs to hear it."
Ellie stood now too, her hands shaking slightly.
"I didn't come here to make anything right," she said, voice low. "I came because I didn't know where else to go."
Maria stepped forward slowly, eyes gentle but guarded.
"She's in Jackson. Dina. Came back a while ago."
Ellie's breath caught.
"She's here?"
"Yeah," Maria nodded. "With JJ."
Ellie blinked fast, her lips parting like she wanted to ask a hundred questions at once—but couldn't form a single one.
Ellie sighed, shoulders sinking as she sat in silence.
Maria's eyes lingered on her. Not just her face but her hand. The missing fingers. The way Ellie tried to hide them without thinking.
"You should go see JJ," Maria said softly.
Ellie looked away.
"I don't know if I can."
Her voice was low, almost ashamed.
Maria didn't push. She just nodded once, quietly.
"She's here. Take a shower. You look like hell."
Ellie blinked. That softness caught her off guard. She wasn't sure what she expected—rage, maybe. Blame. Cold shoulders.
But Maria, despite everything, still let her in. Still handed her a towel and told her where the bathroom was.
Ellie wasn't sure why.
Maybe Maria didn't hate her.
The steam rose around her as she stepped into the shower. Hot water poured over her neck and shoulders, and she stood still, letting it run until her skin stung.
She hadn't had a warm shower in... God, she couldn't even remember.
She zoned out, eyes closed, the sound of the water drowning everything out. Every thought. Every memory. Every "what if."
She still couldn't cry.
She didn't even know if she deserved to.
She stepped out of the bathroom, steam following her like a ghost.
Maria had left out some clothes—a soft plaid button-up and a pair of worn jeans. They didn't quite fit right, but they were warm, and clean. Ellie rolled the sleeves up to her elbows, then just... stood there for a second.
The house was quiet.
Too quiet.
Maria and Tommy had gone out said something about grabbing groceries. Probably needed space more than anything. Ellie noticed the pillow and A blanket folded on the couch. So Tommy probably had been sleeping out here.
Rough bumps, Maria had called it. Ellie didn't ask.
She didn't want to know.
Her eyes drifted to the front door. For a split second, she considered going back to Joel's place.. His coat still hanging by the door. That old mug he always used, chipped at the rim. The pictures on the wall.
She swallowed hard.
No.
Not yet.
Maybe not ever.
So instead, she slipped outside and wandered toward town, hands shoved into her jean pockets. The streets of Jackson felt both familiar and strange like a place she used to live in another life.
At least walking around was bearable.
She stepped outside, the air tinged with early fall—a breeze that whispered of colder days ahead, though the sun still warmed the tops of her shoulders.
Jackson looked almost the same. A few people she recognized passed by, giving her sideways glances. Some whispered. Some just stared.
Ellie felt like a stranger in a town she used to belong to.
And then she saw her.
Dina.
Walking along the path, JJ toddling beside her, holding onto her hand. He was bigger now. Walking on his own.
Ellie stopped cold.
Her stomach dropped.
She'd missed his first steps.
Maybe his first words.
All of it.
And for what?
To not even finish what she left to do? She'd thrown everything away Dina, JJ, home to kill Abby.
And she couldn't even do that.
Ellie stood frozen, like if she didn't breathe, didn't blink, maybe Dina wouldn't notice her.
But she did.
Dina's head lifted instinctively, eyes scanning the path—and locked onto Ellie.
Her expression shifted instantly shock, disbelief, a flicker of something softer. Her eyes went wide, and for a split second, it looked like she might move toward her. Like some part of her still remembered.
But her feet didn't budge.
She didn't run to her.
Not after everything.
Not anymore.
Dina stared at her for a moment long enough for JJ to start turning his head, curious.
But before he could fully see her, Dina gently turned him away, guiding him down the path like Ellie wasn't even there.
Like she didn't want him to see her.
Ellie blinked, stunned.
That stung more than she expected.
She'd missed JJ every single day she was gone. In the quiet moments between the violence. In the cold nights on the road. In every second of that hollow, pointless hunt. She thought about him constantly about his laugh, his tiny hands, the way he'd cling to her shirt like she was the whole damn world.
She missed her little potato.
Dina walked on, stiff in the shoulders, her hand tight on JJ's. She was trying to pretend Ellie was a stranger just some passerby on the street.
But it was clearly hard for her.
She kept glancing back, quick and nervous, like her body couldn't help it. Like some part of her still ached to go to Ellie, even if her mind screamed not to.
Ellie didn't move.
She just stood there, watching them disappear, like someone watching the last good thing they had slip through their fingers again.