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“This is my first daddy, and this is Jayjay, he’s my second daddy.” Lian said after having pulled them both over to her teacher. Her calling him her dad always gave him a squirming feeling in his stomach. It wasn’t really true, Roy was just his best friend. They weren’t married, and Jason had never actually adopted Lian. But that never stopped Lian from introducing him as her second dad, he’d tried to explain that to her but she’d been purposefully stubborn about the whole thing.
All he could do was to shrug it off. He shook the teacher’s hand and asked appropriate questions about Lian’s academic and social growth. She was, of course, doing outstanding in every area, the only complaint was that she sometimes finished her work too quickly and distracted the other kids who hadn’t finished yet. They talked a while about solutions before Lian impatiently dragged them out to the hallway to show them her painting of Jerry the turkey that had made the Thanksgiving display.
Jason mused on the daddy thing the entire drive home.
“Does it bother you when Lian calls me her second dad?” Jason asked that night when they slipped into bed. The apartment had only two rooms, Lian got her own and Jason and Roy shared, the room was too small for two beds, so they shared a king sized one. It was only on nights like this that Jason felt weird about it.
“No, why would I? You do as much for her as I do, you love her, you take care of her, I know you aren’t legally her dad but for our purposes you are.” Roy said after a moment of thought, Jason relaxed a little, Roy’s acceptance soothed the little twist in his stomach that had been there all evening. He wasn’t stepping on Roy’s toes, that had to have been what that feeling was about.
“How’s my favorite brother-in-law?” Dick asked when Roy walked in.
“I’m your only brother-in-law,” Roy joked in return. Watching as Jason rolled his eyes, Dick had started that stupid joke years ago when they’d moved in together.
“Yeah, you don’t have much competition.” Dick laughed. It had made Roy a little uncomfortable when it started, couldn’t two men raise a kid together and just be friends? Also, it pulled up feelings Roy knew were better left alone. He and Jason were just friends, best friends, and that’s all they’d ever be, no matter how much he wanted something else. Now however the joke was well worn, and Roy barely paid it any attention, it didn’t hurt like it used to.
“What are my favorite guys up to?” Roy asked, placing a hand on Jason’s shoulder and leaning over him to study the papers on the table.
“Nothing much, just a bust on some small timers looking to take a step up in the world, should be an easy job, in and out.” Jason said, already a little bored, as if the bust was honestly beneath their skill set.
Famous last words, right?
The bust had been simple, they’d been so sure of themselves though they hadn’t anticipated the late arrival with the automatic rifle. Jason had gotten strafed across the abdomen. It was too much for Leslie and Alfred to fix in the Cave, so he’d been stripped of his costume and taken to Gotham General.
Jason woke up to the sound of argument.
“Family only sir.”
“I am family, I’m his next of kin, check the paperwork.” Roy's voice sounded desperate and on edge. He heard sniffling as well, oh crap Lian. There was some flipping of pages. “Roy Harper, see right there.” The nurse hummed.
“Alright then, I’m sorry, you can go in. Mr. Harper, um, Jason, went through surgery just fine, he’ll be sore, but the bullets didn’t hit anything vital, he was very lucky.”
Jason heard the door to his room burst open and felt someone climb onto his bed.
“Jayjay!” Lian’s voice got him to fight his eyes open. He smiled as brightly as he could at his little girl.
“Careful honey, Jayjay’s really sore, okay?” Roy warned.
“I’ll be careful, promise.” Lian said, before turning back to Jason.
“You’re supposed to be careful too Jayjay.” Lian admonished.
“I’m sorry pumpkin, I promise I’ll be more careful in the future.” He croaked out, god his throat was dry. Roy noticed and immediately popped an ice chip in his mouth.
“Thanks,” he said around the piece of ice. Roy just smiled down at him softly.
“You worried the hell out of us Jaybird.” He said, adding to Lian’s admonishment.
“Didn’t mean to.” Jason argued. He tried hard to keep his eyes open, but sleep soon pulled him under.
“I’m not leaving.” Roy said stoutly, he and Dick had been having this argument for what felt like forever.
“You need to eat, and get a shower Roy.” Dick said. “Lian needs to sleep.” Low blow using Lian against him.
“Boys,” Bruce interrupted. “I’d be happy to take Lian for the night, she can stay at the manor, I think she’ll be taking a day off of school. And I’ll send Tim up with some food and clothes.” Was Bruce being understanding? Must be possessed. He’d worry about that later. When he wasn’t so worried about Jason.
“Ugh,” came a groan from the bed and everyone shut up.
“You with us Jaybird?” Roy asked and Jason blinked open his eyes. Those beautiful fucking eyes, that Roy often got so lost in. Roy wanted to reach out to him, but Lian was conked out in his lap, gluing him to the chair. Bruce and Dick were standing on the other side of the bed, able to provide ice chips as needed.
“Hurts,” Jason managed to whisper, voice hoarse.
“I’ll get the nurse,” Dick said, spinning on his heel to leave. Bruce stepped closer and brushed Jason’s bangs out of his eyes.
The nurse arrived soon and with a shot of morphine into his IV Jason was out again. The nurse shot him a soft smile as she was leaving.
“Your husband will be up and about real soon.” She said doing her best to comfort him. No one had thought he and Jason were brothers, like the alias was supposed to be, they had all jumped to husbands. Dick and the Bat Clan hadn’t helped, playing along. It itched at Roy to have everyone play this game, when he knew it would never happen.
Long hospital stays were bad for the ego. Peeing in a container, puking because of pain medicine, sponge baths, nothing was designed to keep your dignity intact. Roy was there helping him through all of it with a smile. Jason was the love of his life, what was a sponge bath against that.
The day Jason managed to shuffle to the bathroom was cause for celebration. He confessed that his first shower after surgery was the best thing he’d ever felt.
Every time Jason woke up Roy was there, doing his best to provide comfort.
“I know you guys don’t do anything to celebrate, but five years is a big deal, so I brought you a present.” Connor Hawke was standing in their living room, holding out a lumpy, badly wrapped package.
“You didn’t need to, really,” Roy said, Jason shot a quick look in his direction which showed Roy was equally confused.
“No problem, really, you guys should think about doing something this year though, even if it’s just to celebrate Jason’s recovery.” Connor continued. Roy nodded slowly and took the package. “I made it myself, hope it’s not too crappy.”
“I’m sure it’ll be great.” Roy assured him and Jason nodded along. Roy pulled the garishly bright red paper off and exposed a wooden plaque about two hands tall. A tree was carved across it, the initials J+R were carved on it in a heart. Jason just blinked, unsure of what that meant. “I love it,” Roy proclaimed loudly, but Jason knew he was just as confused. But Connor smiled so Jason supposed it was worth a little confusion.
“Five years is the wood anniversary,” Connor informed them. Lian then ran out of her room.
“Here, here, open mine now.” Lian thrust up another badly wrapped gift to Jason. He tore the paper off carefully. Inside was a picture frame made of popsicle sticks, held together by glitter. The picture inside was of the three of them, when they’d gone to Disney World. Jason blinked a few times to keep from tearing up, Lian had been four, it was the first time she’d called Jason daddy.
“Oh honey, it’s perfect.” Jason said before kneeling down to give the girl a large hug.
Later after Connor had gone and Lian was in bed Roy suddenly popped up from where he’d been laying across Jason’s lap as they watched a movie.
“Qurac!” He exclaimed.
“What about it?” Jason asked, brow furrowed.
“That must be the anniversary Connor was talking about, it’s been five years since you snagged me out of prison.” Jason rolled his eyes, it had been six years actually, but he let Roy have it, knowing the mystery was eating at him.
Jason was picking at his nails nervously, he’d been called into an emergency teacher-parent meeting. Roy hadn’t been able to make it, he was in Star helping Ollie and the other Arrows on a big case.
“Mr. Harper?” Lian’s teacher called for him, he stood rubbing his sweaty hands on his jeans. What could this possibly be about? Things had been going very well at their last meeting. “How are you today?” The teacher, Mrs. Graham, asked, smiling sweetly.
“A little nervous, but good.” Jason admitted honestly.
“Oh no, there’s nothing to be nervous about, I promise, is your husband going to be able to make it today?” She asked innocently, Jason’s head spun. Jason and Roy Harper were supposed to be brothers. Not… not husbands. He swallowed hard. His mind stuck. Should he correct her? What if they wouldn’t talk to him if he wasn’t Roy’s husband? He sucked in a breath, Mrs. Graham was looking at him strangely.
“Sorry, no Roy’s away for business for a little while, just me today.” Jason finally babbled.
“It’s always tough when our spouses are away,” she said with an understanding smile. Jason smiled tightly and nodded.
“I wanted to talk about moving Lian up a year actually.” Mrs. Graham said, getting into the real subject matter.
They spoke for a little while, in the end Jason knew he couldn’t possibly make a decision without consulting Roy and Lian herself. He left feeling conflicted and still thinking more about the husband comment than their real topic.
Why was Jason so struck by the idea that someone thought he and Roy were together? That little niggle in his stomach was back. Was it guilt? It didn’t feel like it. He tried to push all the confusing thoughts away. But all he could think about was how right it felt to call Roy his husband.
“Roy!” Their landlord called for him as he walked into the building. He’d finally finished up in Star and was dying to get home to Jason and Lian. Letricia Jeffries, Trish, as she demanded to be called, was a tiny, dark skinned woman who seemed to only own colorful dressing gowns and always had a head full of rollers.
“Yes ma’am,” he answered respectfully, he truly liked Trish.
“I could use a little help if you have a minute.” She said, he smiled and followed after her. “Doodles got stuck on the shelf over the refrigerator, I can’t get her down.” Trish explained.
How had the cat even gotten up there? Doodles was a rotund midget cat, whose idea of exercise was walking to the food bowl from her cushion. Her stubby little legs would have made it nearly impossible for her to climb that high.
But he shrugged and reached up, grasping the cat gently and pulling her out of her hiding place. Doodles started purring as soon as she realized she was safely back in human arms. He handed the cat over to her owner with a smile.
“Oh, thank you honey, I swear I wish all my tenants were as good as you and your husband.” She said while focusing on petting her cat. Husband. There it was again. How many people out there thought that? Why did it matter so much to him?
Maybe, just maybe it was time to do something about this.
“Dick, I need you to answer me honestly, no jokes, okay?” Jason said once he got home from the teacher’s meeting. Lian was playing with the neighbor kids, and he had a free minute to freak out.
“Okay, I can do that, what’s got you so spooked?” Dick asked, sounding worried, he’d been hovering since Jason was shot.
“Do you think me and Roy are married?” He asked tentatively. Dick laughed for a second.
“Dude, duh, why would you ask that?” Dick asked him in return.
“Dick we aren’t married, we aren’t even dating.” Jason said flatly.
“The fuck? Of course you’re married, you have been for like five years, you just had your anniversary.” Dick said, sounding startled.
“Nope, I swear on Robin, not married.” Jason promised.
“I’m coming over.” Dick said before hanging up on him.
Ten minutes later a wind blown Dick burst into his apartment.
“Okay what is this bullshit?” He asked before even saying hello.
“Lian’s teacher thinks we’re married, Connor and you think we’re married. Dick I’m freaking out a little.” Jason said.
“Jason, you share a bed. Lian calls you her second daddy, Roy calls himself my brother-in-law.” Dick said slowly.
“He thinks it’s a joke because my Jason Harper alias is supposed to be Roy’s brother.” Jason explained.
“Hold on Jason Harper is an alias?” Dick asked, voice a little squeaky. He sunk down onto the couch, looking a little devastated and a lot confused.
“Um, are you okay?” Jason asked.
“Okay? No, I am not okay. You guys are like couple goals, you helped me regain my belief in true love, and you’re telling me none of it’s real.” Dick said, sounding strangled and breathless.
“Okay, I, you know I don’t know what to say to that.” Jason said honestly, this wasn’t how he thought this was going to play out.
“Jason, you’re in love with Roy.” Dick said. Jason blanked out for a moment. Oh shit.
Of course he was in love with Roy. Roy was his best friend, his partner in crime, his everything. But Jason suddenly realized maybe that love wasn’t as platonic as he’d always thought. Was that the reason he felt so squirmy earlier?
He’d had a crush on Roy when he was Robin, but he thought that was long since dead and buried. Maybe not so much. A million thoughts flashed through his mind, cuddling in their bed, lounging on one another during movies, Roy holding his hand in the hospital. Oh, hell, he was totally in love with Roy, wasn’t he?
“Dickie, what the hell am I supposed to do?” Jason asked.
“Tell him! You should be together, for real.” Jason didn’t know what to say to that.
“I can’t lose him.” Jason said. Dick laughed.
“He’s so in love with you it’s ridiculous, there’s nothing you could do short of hurting Lian that would get him to leave you.” Dick explained in that annoyingly slow voice again.
“I think if that was true he would have made a move by now.” Jason said
“Like you did?” Dick countered.
Dick was in the apartment when he got up there.
“Good to see you man, but I was just leaving.” Dick said, sliding past him to head out the door.
“See you around then,” Roy said, mostly to the door.
Jason was sitting on the couch, eyes unfocused, looking a million miles away. Roy dropped his bag by the door and kicked off his shoes before plopping down on the couch. Jason didn’t move to acknowledge him.
“Earth to Jason, you in there bud?” Roy asked. Jason blinked and shook his head. He looked at Roy like he was surprised to see him. Roy went to ask him what was wrong but before he could Jason started to talk.
“I’m in love with you, we should get married.” He blurted out, he looked more shocked than Roy felt and that was saying something because Roy was shook. Years of pining and wishing, years of fruitless wanting and Jason just drops this on him.
Jason was beginning to fidget, face red, and Roy realized he hadn’t said anything.
“Yes,” Roy scrambled to say. “Yes, that’s… We should do that. I love you too.” Roy had imagined confessing his feelings a million times, in his dreams he was always so suave and in control, nothing like the stammering mess he really was.
“You do?” Jason asked, sounding absolutely shocked.
“Dude, for years.” Roy said. Jason huffed out a sigh.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” He asked.
“Scared, didn’t want to ruin what we had, you never seemed interested.” Roy said with a shrug, “take your pick.”
“I’m interested.” Jason said, trying to sound casual and failing.
“Good,” Roy said, shifting on the couch to get closer. Jason looked nervous but leaned closer. Roy pushed into his space slowly, leaving time for Jason to change his mind, before finally pressing their lips together.
The kiss might have started slow and tentative but didn’t stay that way. Jason seemed to be wanting to make up for lost time. He clambered up onto Roy’s lap, tangled his hands in Roy’s hair and proceeded to devour him.
“Mm, we wasted so much time.” Jason lamented between kisses. He was grinding down on Roy, slow and dirty and perfect.
“We still have so much time.” Roy assured him, gripping his hips and directing him in a harder grind. They were so preoccupied with each other they missed the door opening.
“Eww, gross.” Lian whined from beside the couch, startling Jason right off Roy. They both grabbed a throw pillow and placed it in their laps. Such bad timing, from Jason’s moans he’d been close.
“Sorry sweetie,” Roy said, face burning.
“Whatever, it’s just daddy stuff.” Lian said flippantly before skipping to her room.
“We’re getting married and I’m adopting her, like immediately.” Jason said, Roy could help but agree.