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“My family’s going to love you,” Ardelia snorted.
Clarice huffed, steadying the foiled dish of green bean casserole she was holding.
“I don’t know why you have to say it like that. Like I’m some sitcom they’re gonna watch.”
“Oh hush.”
They shivered on the stoop of Ardelia’s childhood home. D.C. weather had not been kind the past year. There was a dusting of snow on the ground, evident from a temperature dip. Accordingly, the roommates bundled up in their coats and boots. And Starling of course had her scarf. They had already kicked the slush from their shoes while they waited for someone to open the door. Ardelia rang the doorbell a full three minutes ago. Worry pricked at the back of Clarice’s mind. She rubbed her knees together, aching for a heated room.
Finally, the knob turned. A tall figure filled the doorway.
“Dad!” Ardelia lept into his arms.
“Oh ho ho!” He reeled back. “Come now Delia, my back ain’t what it used to be.”
Clarice studied him while he was distracted, trying to remember what Ardelia told her. Harvey Mapp went into the army as soon as he could and served until he physically couldn’t. Still built like a soldier, he stood intimidatingly tall. But walked with a definite limp. Ardelia told her how he refused to use a cane. From the moment he met Ardelia’s mother they had been rivals. Viewing the other through the lenses of a jet or a shark. Always bickering and boasting shared hatred. Soon they were married.
In person, Clarice noticed his thick grey mustache. You could tell he cared for that thing: trims, oils, the whole nine yards.
“Clarice, I presume?” His back straightened, towering over her.
“Yes, Mr. Mapp, sir.” She stuck out her hand, balancing the casserole on her hip. It felt strange being addressed by her first name after always leading with “Agent Starling.”
Completely ignoring her attempt at a handshake, he bent over laughing. She slowly lowered her hand back to the pyrex.
“Hooo girl, I haven't heard such pleasantries since the war,” he said. “Call me Harvey.”
“Of course, sir.”
He squinted at her. “What is that accent?”
Ardelia piped in, “Daddy-“
“West Virginia, sir.”
“West Virginia?” He whistled low. “Some gorgeous mountains you got there.”
“Daddy, come on. We’re freezing out here. You can tell us all about mountains once we’re inside,” Ardelia pleaded.
“You hear how she’s hounding me?” He eyed Clarice. “Damn, Ardelia can’t you see I’m talking to our guest?” He gestured dramatically to Clarice. She felt like a child again. People talking above her. Trying to be swayed to one adult’s side. She braced herself for one of her mother’s berating rambles.
“My deepest apologies for my daughter.” Harvey bent down and hugged Clarice. It was snug. The casserole sandwiched between them. She once again felt like a child, but only because of how small she was in his arms.
He uncoiled himself from her. Mustache tilted to one side in what had to be a smile. “Let’s get that green bean casserole inside. Smells delicious.” He swiveled back to the door. Ease filled her system.
While his back was turned, Clarice’s eyes met Ardelia’s. Starling couldn’t read her expression. A dim annoyance to her father, a reassuring steadiness, a readying for what’s to come? She couldn’t tell. But Clarice herself couldn’t help but feel softer after the exchange.
She was suddenly hit with the truth that she was inside the Mapps’ home.
Harvey immediately waddled away, supposedly forgetting the blue ridge mountains. So instead she was faced with a collection of strangers.
Clarice didn’t know how they fit so much life inside a house. What seemed like a sea of bodies filled the room. She tried to put names to faces from Ardelia’s notes. Bless her stars, it was overwhelming. There were so many people and a lot of them were staring at her.
Finally, a voice laughed from the couch: “Oh great, the cops are here!”
“You hush now, Jesse!” Ardelia barked back, but her words had no anger behind them. She turned to Clarice. “Gimme your coat,” she motioned with her chin as she unbuttoned her own. “While I put these away, can you put the casserole in the kitchen?” Clarice nodded while shrugging off her overcoat and handing it to her roommate. Ardelia snatched the scarf around her neck as well.
“Thanks.”
Ardelia looked at her warmly before disappearing down the hallway.
Now she was alone.
To her right, Clarice heard the whirring of a mixer. She followed the sound to the kitchen and peered inside.
“We brought green bean casserole,” she said. Ardelia had stressed the importance of bringing a dish. They had been practicing this recipe weeks in advance. For good reason too. Clarice’s first attempts were scary. She had the palate of a twelve year old and the cooking skills of one too. So Ardelia made sure she knew this dish by heart. She had stuffed herself with so many creamy greens that November that it now hurt to look at them. Batch upon batch filled their fridge. Both of them had brought slices to their bosses. Every meal consisted of reheated Tupperware. But it was worth it. Ardelia finally deemed her plate-able.
In the kitchen, a short woman chopping vegetables looked over her shoulder. Clarice noticed her wedding ring and instantly knew it was Ardelia’s mom. Harriet Mapp was a retired nurse who still raved about her E.R. horror stories. She married Harvey in her early twenties. She wanted a ring she could wear to work without worrying about losing it or keeping it clean. So he proposed with a small elastic band. When it snapped, they simply got a new one. Not a grain of sentimentality between the couple. Years after nursing, she still wore the band.
“Oh you’re Ardelia’s friend! I’m her mother! So good to finally meet you. Just put it on the counter there, honey.”
Clarice squeezed the casserole between countless other foiled dishes. She knew she should get out of there quickly. No one wants a cramped kitchen. There were already five Mapps in there, they didn’t need a Starling. A hand on her shoulder turned her around.
“Hey, you,” Ardelia grinned. “C’mon.” She pulled Clarice back to the living room.
That’s where the majority of the family was. Adults crowded around the tv. A couple of teens were in the corner taking turns on a handheld video game. She overheard children in the backyard laughing. All the couches and chairs were taken so Ardelia led her to a spot on the floor where she put down two pillows from her parents’ bed.
“Can we flip it to the game now?” A wrinkled face complained from the Laz-e Boy.
A chorus of women groaned at him.
“Ugh, Amos.”
“Some of us want to watch the parade.”
“If you wanna watch football you could’ve stayed home.”
“You’ll be asleep by the time we turn it on.”
Clarice swallowed a laugh.
Ardelia whipped her head around recognizing one of the voices, “Kendis!”
“Hey, girl!”
Clarice followed Ardelia’s gaze.
Kendis was the most gorgeous woman Clarice had ever seen. She was a tall Newark girl with hooded eyes and bright lipstick. Starling’s mind raced with thoughts of Ardelia’s flash cards. Kendis was Ardelia’s favorite cousin, but if Clarice told anyone that she would kill her. Both Harvey and Harriet came from large families with many siblings. They silently agreed they didn’t want that in adulthood so Ardelia was an only child. But she was plagued with dozens of cousins. Kendis was 28, worked at a salon, and had enough charisma to fill a college campus. She was now perched on Ardelia’s shoulder like a cat. They both laughed at a joke Clarice missed.
Kendis wiped her eye. “When did you get here?”
“No more than ten minutes ago.” The residue of mirth laid obvious on her tongue.
“Oh, I need to catch you up on everything .“ But before her recap could start, Kendis noticed Clarice. “…wait a minute, who’s this little cutie pie?”
Clarice felt heat creep up her neck.
“Kendis, this is Clarice. I’m training with her at Quantico.” Very professional.
“Shit, you guys are the real deal.” Kendis squeaked a high pitched laugh. “So tell me Clarice,” she leaned across Ardelia. “Is Delia any good?” Ardelia rolled her eyes and watched Clarice expectantly.
“Top of her class.”
“That’s what I like to hear!” Kendis smacked Ardelia’s shoulder.
A highschool aged boy poked Kendis in the shoulder.
“Mom wants you in the kitchen.”
“Ugh, sorry I have to leave you with Shaun.” She glared at her brother. “All he wants to talk about is Spike Lee. Thinks he’s a film critic or something.” Kendis wobbled to a stance and left.
“At least I have taste!” He squawked to the back of her head. He cooled himself. “‘Sup, Delia.” Clarice fixated on his big red glasses.
“Hi, Shaun,” She already sounded annoyed.
He squatted down, “you seen Malcom X?”
“Yes, Shaun.”
“How ‘bout you?” He pointed a finger at Starling.
“Shaun. This is Clarice. She’s my roommate at Quantico.” Ardelia put an arm around her. Less professional. “She-“
“Ardelia! Kitchen!” Kendis sang out.
“Coming!” She looked at Clarice then to Shaun. “You wanna come?” She extended a hand to Clarice.
“I’m ok.”
Ardelia smiled.
“Today, Ardelia!”
She rushed out of the living room without looking back.
After the dust had settled Shaun once again locked eyes with her.
“So?”
“Yes, I’ve seen it.”
The whites of his eyes filled his frames. It felt good to shock him.
“Really!” His face lit up. “Well-well, how do you interpret…”
Clarice listened to how Shaun believed Spike Lee was the greatest director of all time and a genius of the modern era. After calling her and Ardelia snitches of course. He was so excited to hear her takes on the movie. Especially, from someone of ‘her perspective’. It was sweet to hear him chatter about something he was so passionate about. She loved young people. They were just finding what they liked and who they were. Any minute thing they had interest in they flung themselves at in full force. She wished she still had that energy.
“…it’s just brilliant. What’s your favorite scene?”
“I mean the Mecca scene is life changing. It’s hard for me to even suggest—“
“Oh my god,” Ardelia looked horrified. “What is this?” She circled the air between Shaun and Clarice.
“Your friend’s cool.” His face was all grin.
“Well she’s mine. You can’t have her.”
Ardelia’s words made Clarice’s skin burn. It was a joke, obviously. But that didn’t make the bloom of
color across her cheeks any less real.
Ardelia’s mom called into the living room. “Could someone check on the kids out back?”
“Yes!” Ardelia said far too eagerly. “You’re coming with me this time. You don’t have a choice.” She pulled up Clarice.
“Aw, Delia, c’mon. We were just talking,” he whined.
“Shut it, Shaun.”
Was Ardelia jealous? What a beautiful rarity. Her anger was palpable. Her mouth pulled in a tight little line. And all because Clarice had talked to her cousin. Her dorky film bro cousin at that. Oh what a sight. She needed to talk to more cousins because seeing Ardelia protective like this was adorable.
Ardelia pulled her by the hand, fuming.
Starling tried, “everything ok in the kitchen?”
“Overflowing pot. Kendis has never cooked a day in her life,” she laughed. Clarice was somewhat relieved. “She was freaking out. Everything’s under control now.”
Ardelia dropped her hand once they reached the screen door.
“Sorry about Shaun. I know he can be…pretentious.” Ardelia fiddled with the lock.
Clarice quirked a brow, “I like the kid. He’s just really into his stuff.” Clarice watched Ardelia struggle. “Are you ok?”
Ardelia’s hand slipped.
She stared at the lock for a good three seconds.
“Yeah.” The door opened. A wind of cool air chilled her system. “You just surprised me, Starling. No one ever wants to talk to Shaun.” The crowd of little kids spotted them and started running over. “It was cute. Keep surprising me.” Ardelia had tired eyes. Gosh, she could not read Mapp today at all.
A boy in an orange puffer coat was yelling: “Delia! Delia! Is the food ready?”
“Not yet, sport!” She called back. Seamlessly slipping back into her familial role.
“So you came out here to play?” Asked a girl with beaded hair. Her grin was almost malicious.
Ardelia muttered to Clarice, “we can go back inside if you want.”
“It’s ok.”
A boy wearing a jersey stared up at her. “Who are you?”
“I’m Clarice. I’m Ardelia’s friend.” Not professional. He did not care in the slightest.
“Can you play tag?”
Before Ardelia could make up an excuse to why they couldn’t, Clarice had already said yes.
“Then you’re it!” He jabbed her leg and ran off laughing. The kids scattered.
Clarice looked at Ardelia.
Ardelia crossed her arms, “Well are you gonna do it, or not?”
Clarice patted her back, “Tag!”
She sprinted off to the far end of the yard. Ardelia didn’t even bother.
“I’m coming for you Virgil!” Ardelia chased after the boy in the jersey.
Clarice found a mini soccer goal to hide behind.
She felt a tug at her sleeve.
A quiet voice spoke up to her, “Miss Clarice, I’m Inez. Can we truce?” A new little girl met her eyes. And boy, big eyes at that. Clarice didn’t see her when they first came outside.
“Sure, Inez,” Clarice whispered.
The two watched the game play out behind the net. That quick jolt across the yard had got her blood pumping. But after standing behind a soccer goal for more than twenty seconds Clarice had felt the harsh truth of the weather. Her skin stung with chill. The kids had the advantage of winter coats she thought. She shifted her weight to accommodate the freeze.
Virgil hopped on the puffer coat boy.
“You’re It, Leo!”
The boy groaned under him.
Clarice crouched behind the goal further. She counted five little heads chasing each other. And one Ardelia of course.
Said roommate had stopped to catch her breath while the tots laughed at her. That’s when Ardelia spotted her. She grinned like a shark before taking off. Clarice ducked around Inez and turned the goal post. The snow forced her to slide, which was admittedly terrifying. Thankfully, her footing remained grounded. Ardelia didn’t make the same mistake though. She gained ground on her, swiping at hairs. The kids began cheering for different teams.
Ardelia listened in, “Oh, Leo, c’mon! You met her twenty minutes ago! You’re been my nephew your whole life!” He giggled at her, hiding his face in his mittens.
Clarice wove around the picnic table and leaped the rouge football. She skidded in the snow; powder flying like a Coca Cola ad.
“I’m gonna get you, Starling!”
“You can try!” She looked back.
“Clarice, do a figure eight!” Called Virgil.
She twisted herself around the lawn. The children cheered. The only name in their chant now was “Clarice”.
“You’re losing supporters, Mapp!”
“You are not. Taking. My. Babies!” Ardelia thrusted forward, fingers about to reach—
Clarice’s shoe slid across the ice. Her balance thrown off kilter. Mid dissent, she turned and landed on her side. She felt herself falling into the snow with a soft crunch. The sharp coldness hit her like a slap to the face. She felt like she was dunked in a slushie. Ardelia stumbled over Clarice’s feet and came down on top of her.
Childish laughs sounded from around the yard.
Starling didn’t even attempt to move. She watched Ardelia push herself to a plank above her. A deep part in Clarice liked this position more than she should have.
Ardelia panted above her, “you’re it.” She pressed a finger to her nose.
The kids booed.
“You disappointed my fans,” Clarice grinned lazily.
“Oh no. That was all you.” Plumes of smoke left Ardelia’s lips. “Looks like Miss West Virginia can’t handle the snow.” She traced the snow crystals in Clarice’s hair.
“I’ll have you know, Agent Mapp, we get plenty of snow in-“
“Children, go set the table! Foods almost ready!” An auntie yelled from the screen door.
Ardelia abruptly stood. The kids all ran inside, kicking off boots and throwing gloves. Clarice’s heart was still pounding from the cardio. And other things. Ardelia helped her up.
“Miss Clarice.” The same little voice was beside her.
“Well hey, Inez.”
“Thank you for trucing with me.”
“Of course, sweet heart.” She truly was as cute as a button.
Clarice held out a high five which the girl happily slapped.
“Go inside, now. They’re waiting,” she jerked her head to the door.
Little Inez raced up the steps.
For a moment, Clarice just stood with Ardelia on her arm. They caught their breath together. Watching the puffs of vapor get steadier. Never saying a word.
“Jesus, Clarice. Your whole sides soaked from the snow,” Ardelia ran a hand down her torso.
“Yeah, I didn’t want to say anything.”
“Say anything? I cannot have you at my Thanksgiving table dripping wet.” An innuendo crossed Clarice’s mind that she didn’t dare say.
Ardelia pushed her inside. She swiftly avoided all family members and made a straight shot for her childhood bedroom. Once in, she locked the door and kicked off her shoes. Clarice followed her example.
“Just sit on the bed.”
Clarice tried not to get the covers wet. A stuffed lizard shared the bed with her. She examined the space. An Alien poster was plastered on the wall. Definitely from a recent visit and not a childhood relic. Ardelia was not quiet about her celebrity crush on Sigourney Weaver. Surrounding the poster were several Care Bear stickers. The poster tried to hide the biggest ones. There were framed pictures from high school. A small jewelry box next to a pen cup. A Spock sticker pressed to the cup. Teen Ardelia must have been a hoot.
Ardelia dug through her closet. “Most of this is from highschool. So I’m sorry in advance.” She pulled out a large yellow cable knit sweater.
“What do you think?” She asked, apologetically.
“Anything’s better than wet clothes.”
“That’s my girl.” She tossed her the garment.
Ardelia continued to dig for some pants. Clarice now noticed Ardelia’s muddied knees. The padding of snow had not saved her from grass stains.
“We might have to sport sweatpants, because these jeans are tiny. I don’t know how I used to fit into these.”
Ardelia threw Clarice a pair of gray sweatpants and kept a black pair for herself.
Ardelia started peeling off her wet leggings. Clarice quickly turned, feeling guilty. They had seen each other in far further statuses of undress but it felt wrong here, surrounded by Care Bear stickered walls.
“You’re really good with kids.”
Thank god. A distraction.
“You think so?” Clarice raised her shirt over her head.
“Are you kidding! They loved you.” Ardelia’s words dripped with honey. “I could totally see you with little ones. You just— you know how to talk to them.” Why did Clarice’s stomach feel flighty? She was a hardened FBI agent. Not a spacey kindergarten teacher. Ardelia kept gushing. “You looked so cute with them.”
“Cool it on the mushiness, ok?” She smoothed down the sweater and pulled up the new pants.
“Or what? You’ll come over here and kiss me to shut me up?”
“You suck.” Clarice’s face felt on fire.
“Yeah? And you swallow.”
“Ardelia!”
Clarice whipped around without thinking. Thankfully, both of them were fully dressed. Ardelia was facing her wearing her high school sweatpants with a hand over her eyes. She had a stupid smirk on her face.
“You can look,” she grumbled.
Ardelia dropped her hand.
“Looking sharp, Starling,” she chuckled. Ardelia slinked over to her and slid into Clarice’s arms. She rubbed her sides. “You ready?”
“As ever.”
Ardelia pecked her forehead. “They already like you. You’ll do great.”
And so they entered the dining room.
The table was long with two leaves pushed in. Folks kept perambulating from the kitchen, placing down dinner platters, then returning to grab more.
Kendis found them, “Dre and Sonya have officially started fighting.”
“It wouldn’t be Thanksgiving if they hadn’t,” Ardelia quipped.
The three of them made their way to the kitchen to help set up.
While hauling their respective dishes back, Kendis focused on Clarice.
“You like my kid brother, huh?”
“He’s something, alright.”
“I barely know you and I’m begging you please do not go after him.” Kendis dropped her meat platter with a thud.
Clarice slowly smiled. “I wasn’t planning on it.”
Kendis propped herself up on the side of the table. “Thank god , because if Delia brought a fine girl home and she got involved with my baby brother I would just about kill myself.” The words rang in Clarice’s ears. Brought a girl home? Did Ardelia’s family think they were more than friends? She tried not to let any emotion show on her face.
“Kendis, you, me, and the immortal saints would sooner drop dead than Clarice going on a date with Shaun. I can promise you that.” Ardelia saved her. She tossed her dish next to Kendis’.
“Thank you, Jesus.” Kendis gripped her forehead and she wandered back to the kitchen.
All the dishes had been set. Warm scents wafted through the air. The dinner table filled with faces young and old. Clarice was squished between Ardelia and an old granny with thick glasses.
Before the feast, Ardelia’s dad made a speech.
“Now, I’d just like to say a few words before we begin.”
“Better be fewer than last year, Harv!”
A few crows of laughter sounded down the table.
“I admit my speeches can be long. I’ll try to be short… I’d just like to say how thankful I am for the people around this table. We have some veterans of the Mapp house with us and we have some new faces joining,” he winked at Clarice. “Harriet and I are thrilled to have all of you with us for this great meal. And I’m sure you’ll be happy to know that there is no dry bird at this table!”
Ardelia had warned Clarice of her family’s vendetta against turkey. Thought it was too much work, little reward. So the only poultry served was chicken. To make up for it, there were several of them on the table.
Harvey went on, “I’m thankful for all you bastards!” Ardelia’s mom smacked his arm for the curse. He didn’t react. “Except maybe Dick!” He pointed to a man in a red shirt. A good portion of the table laughed. “Dig in!”
The feast had begun.
Harriet Mapp rose with a bottle of wine.
“Would anyone—besides my husband—like some grown up juice?” She shook the bottle. Several hands raised. She swooped around the table fulfilling glasses. Clarice would only partake if Ardelia did. Her mother passed them.
“Would you girls like some?”
“Yes please, mama.”
Oh thank all things holy.
“Thank you, ma’am,” Clarice raised her glass. It was a delicious shade of red but she didn’t want to seem eager and drink too soon. It didn’t seem like anyone else cared though.
Clarice wheeled and dealed platters between family members and eventually managed to fill her own plate.
A weathered woman complained about her hip surgery. The sporty cousin brought up The Uncle We Don’t Speak Of. An argument broke out between two teenage boys. Then their mothers got involved. Harvey marched to the far end of the table and things seemed to calm down rather quickly. She bet he loved this. Being the ringmaster of Thanksgiving. He seemed to have a sick love for having the title of host, making speeches, and settling arguments. Harriet also seemed charmed at her role. Getting to make fun of her husband. Housing her loved ones from the cold. Using Thanksgiving as an excuse to make some fancier dishes she never got to display.
The food was amazing. Not standard though, that was for sure. There were some classics on the table: mashed potatoes, gravy, her and Ardelia’s green bean casserole. But that’s where it stopped. Next to her casserole we’re deviled eggs. She spotted a plate of egg rolls, collard greens, and a whole cod. A true smorgasbord.
The nanny next to her wanted the fish. Clarice served her the cut she pointed to. She sucked her lips where they were absent of teeth. The woman was quite pleased.
“Such a gentleman,” she remarked.
Ardelia stuffed a laugh into her hand.
Clarice drank her wine. She knew she would never hear the end of that.
Shit, Harriet Mapp bought good wine. Clarice knew she couldn’t afford this. She tried to be nonchalant with her sips.
“More wine, dear?”
Harriet snuck up behind her.
“Please, ma’am.”
Clarice wiped her lips. Her glass swirled with the deep red liquid.
“Damn, girl,” Ardelia muttered next to her
Sure enough, Ardelia’s glass was still nearly full. Fuck, she was being a terrible guest. Drinking up their good wine, packing her plate-
“My kind of woman!” Bellowed Harvey. His laugh was strong and rang through the room.
“I respect a girl who can hold her liquor.”
Clarice held her tongue at the correction.
Maybe she wasn’t being a terrible guest?
“Dad,” Ardelia glared at him, “can we please not promote alcoholism today.”
Nope, terrible guest.
Harvey and Clarice mirrored each other. Both looking down at their plates. Not daring to start another fight at the table. Especially one with Ardelia.
At least she knew Harvey liked her. At least when he was drunk.
She gorged herself to forget. Rich and creamy tastes filled her palate. She understood where Ardelia got her cooking skills from. Clarice didn’t look up much the rest of the meal. She had a scrumptious plate in front of her. Nothing could hold her attention more.
The woman next to her tapped Clarice’s plate with a long finger nail.
“Um, yes?” Clarice covered her mouthful of food with a hand.
“I love your shoes.”
“Oh.” Clarice was not wearing shoes. She had left them in Ardelia’s room. But she didn’t have the heart to tell the old granny. “Thank-“
“Jesse!” The old bird screeched across the table. “Look at this white boy’s shoes.”
Clarice wanted to dissolve through the floor. Ardelia was snickering into her palm. Jesse, apparently, laughed.
“Oh nana you’re crazy.”
A few heads ducked under the table to inspect her footwear. If they looked, they would only find Ardelia’s stockinged foot on top of her. Clarice was at least happy her fashion sense was approved by blind old women. Since cannibalistic serial killers seemed to hate it.
Throughout the rest of dinner she popped into a few conversations. Describing FBI training or egging on more info about a criminal neighbor. She even got a few laughs. Oh it felt good.
Clarice’s plate had been emptied. She stuffed herself to sickness. Wishing she could pack up everyone’s leftovers and take them home to herself. If Quantico counted as a home.
Her gaze drifted to her green bean casserole. It had been demolished! No slices to wrap up. A sense of acceptance. Even if Ardelia had heavily helped in its creation. Hopefully, that would make up for her draining their wine supply.
Bodies had begun leaving the table. It was a relief that there was no grand “may I be excused?”. People just left when they were done, and proceeded to the kitchen to drop off dirty dishes. Then retreated to the living room to nap. Clarice stayed a few extra minutes after she finished. She told herself it was because of the great story Mr. Mapp was telling. Or how she was so tired she didn’t want to get up from her seat. It may have also had something to do with the small circles Ardelia’s foot was tracing on top of her sock. She stayed until her roommate had finished grazing. Then asked for her empty plate. She almost kissed her cheek when Ardelia handed it to her. But Clarice remembered where she was. She saw the yellow sleeves of the sweater she was wearing. She saw how Harvey’s mustache moved when he talked. She saw the same kids she played tag with, asleep in a dog pile.
She sped to the kitchen.
There, a stack of dishes had started in the sink. What a productive distraction. She rolled up her sleeves and began to scrub.
The wall of separation from the table was a godsend. Everything was muffled and no one could talk to her. But she didn’t feel like she was out of the know. It was paradise. She sponged dishes and splashed spoons, placing them on the Mapp’s elaborate drying rack. The soap stung the cut on her finger but after a while she hardly noticed it. The burn of the steaming water kept her awake. The scraping of grime untangled the knot in her skull. It reminded her of picking the dirt beneath her fingernails.
Relatives frequently stopped by to drop more dishes for cleaning. Some made a remark on Clarice’s work. A smile was the most eloquent reply she could muster.
Her sponge was looking scraggly. She poked her head back into the dining room, and to her surprise, found it absent of dishes. Only Ardelia, silently talked with her dad. Clarice ducked back in. Wow. How had she cleaned up so quickly? She wiped the few remaining forks, falsely thinking she was done. Yet there on the stove were a myriad of pots and saucepans left by the chefs. She worked her hands against their grease. Shining their appearance to her satisfaction. Now…now she was done.
“Clarice?”
Ardelia. She instinctively faced her.
“Hey,” her voice was heavy, “sorry I kind of dipped out of there.”
Ardelia didn’t hear her words. She only saw her wet sleeves and the mountain of drying ceramic behind her. Her eyes grew larger than the washed saucers.
“You did the dishes.” Ardelia said. Her gaze beyond anything in the room.
Clarice scratched her neck. “Yeah. Someone had to.”
Ardelia came back to Earth.
“Yeah, me.”
“Huh?”
“I had dish duty this year.” Ardelia sunk into Clarice’s arms, “But you spared me. And trust me, I know it’s hell.” She rubbed circles in Clarice’s back.
“It wasn’t too bad.”
Ardelia groaned, “will you shut up?”
Starling snorted and eventually snuggled into the embrace. Ardelia rested her cheek on Clarice's shoulder. They stood in a knot for a while. Clarice thought she was going to fall asleep when Ardelia spoke again:
“Thank you, Clarice.”
She pulled back to look at her. Clarice had used up all her power for today. Her eyelids hung open by pure luck. Ardelia hummed.
“I think there’s room on the couch if you want-“
“Yes, please.”
Just like Ardelia said, the couch lay bare. Almost an entire living room emptied. Only populated by some sleeping heads on cozy chairs. Ardelia snuck in front of Clarice to get first dibs on the couch space. Clarice couldn't care less about what she rested on. Ardelia comically stretched trying to take up as much room as possible. Clarice just crawled on top of her and planted.
“Oh-“ Ardelia sputtered.
Clarice nestled into her crevices. She felt consumed by Ardelia‘s softness. God, she felt so rich. Even now, her skin buzzed from the ghost of seething water. Still feeling weighted from all the food, like a metal post dug in the sand. She soaked in Ardelia’s warmth. Her mind swarming with her name. Her fingers twirling her hair. She never felt richer.
The last moments before sleep she heard Ardelia’s conversation with Kendis.
“Delia, this your girlfriend?” She whispered. The very opposite of professional.
Ardelia didn’t respond right away. She instead took to petting Clarice’s hair.
“No. Just a friend.”
But Clarice knew. And through the next few Thanksgivings everyone else seemed to catch on too.