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“Ian quit joking; you know that we’re soulmates, I’ve seen the colors for weeks now, who else would it be? Don’t you want to be my soulmate?” Kash murmured as he brushed a thumb against Ian’s cheek.
Ian smiled, of course he wanted Kash to be his soulmate, Kash was his first serious relationship, albeit secretive because of Kash’s marriage, but they were a great match. It made Ian feel sad when he found out that Kash still hadn’t been able to see the colors up until a few weeks ago. He couldn’t imagine Kash going so long without seeing the colors of the world for the first time until recently. Kash was kind, bought him things that he wouldn’t be able to afford on his own, he cared about him, made him feel special, taught him things he never would have known otherwise. That’s what a soulmate does right?
“Kash, of course I want to be your soulmate. I just, but you know you can’t see the colors until you hit the proper age anyway, remember?” Ian muttered; he didn’t want to upset Kash by reminding him that he was still on the younger side of their respective age difference. Kash could be sensitive to it at times, but he was always insistent that he was willing to wait for Ian, wait until they could be together and not be judged for their age gap.
“Oh, right I forgot about that. Well, just means I get to see a special someone on his birthday in a couple weeks. You have that day off, but come into the store anyway yeah? That way you can see the colors for real when you see me. That way I won’t be doing a crappy job of describing them to you, when I tell you about perfect green of your eyes or the copper tone of your hair.” Kash’s face lit up at the idea of Ian seeing him as soon as he turned the age for the colors to appear.
Ian smiled at him and continued to stack the produce in the sale bins. Ian fantasized about the day he would see the colors for the first time. He could remember hearing about them as a child whenever his parents talked about how they met. Fiona used to be obsessed with finding her soulmate, looking every guy in the face intently determined for her colors to show. So far, she hasn’t had any luck and she was still seeing things in tones of gray like 66% of the population. Lip hasn’t seen his either, the rest of the kids were too young to even think about their colors. Debbie was in the fairy tale stage of knowing about them.
“Isn’t it romantic?” She’d say in a dramatic voice as she looked at pictures of celebrity couples in her magazines she’d steal from Fiona.
“Just imagine you’re walking down the street one day; you make eye contact with them and BOOM!” She slammed her hands on the table, “Everything suddenly bursts into color, and you’ve found your destiny.” Debbie would emote over her morning oatmeal.
“Just imagine you seeing your soulmate before they see you, and you know before they do so you can surprise them.” Debbie always got worked up over the thousands of possibilities of seeing the colors and meeting your soulmate.
Frank always talked about how when he saw Monica the world exploded into colors, how it changed the outlook on the world. But based on how Monica walked out, maybe they weren’t soulmates, or maybe he wasn’t her soulmate. Soulmates are supposed to stay together forever, weren’t they?
The bell above the door chimed and Ian turned to see who walked in and he groaned, Mickey Milkovich was here again.
“I’ll watch the register.” Kash said as he placed a hand on Ian’s shoulder as he passed by. Ian smiled as Kash’s hand ran across his shoulders and lingered before the weight of his hand disappeared.
Ian busied himself with the fruit as Mickey made his way around the store. Ian glanced at him as he looked at the chip selection at the endcap of an aisle.
Mickey Milkovich was his friend Mandy’s older brother by about two years. He had a greasy mop of inky black hair that had been spiked up with gel for the last couple months making Mickey look like he had stuck a knife in an electrical socket. His eyes were always flickering around taking in the surroundings, probably to keep a getaway in mind after stealing something, always shifting, and looking around. His lips were plump, usually pulled into a sneer over his teeth, a small gap in between the top front two.
Ian’s gaze flitted back to the fruit as Mickey’s eyes caught his, trying to busy himself so Mickey would leave him alone Ian focused intently on the number of apples he had left.
He glanced out of the corner of his eye when he heard Mickey approaching. He cursed under his breath as Mickey stopped in place next to him.
Ian turned and looked at Mickey, he hadn’t ever really been this close to him.
He could smell the dirt that always seemed to be dusting his face or caking his hands. Surprised at the scent being more earthy than grimy Ian inhaled again, careful not to be obvious about it. Like a field after a rainstorm, that’s what Mickey smelled like. Mixed with the scent of his ever-present cigarettes, all entwined with a scent that Ian couldn’t place. He felt his brows furrowing as he tried to think of it.
“Are you a dog now Gallagher? You’re sniffing me like a fucking K-nine mutt.” Mickey snarled giving Ian a pointed look, his eyebrows raised high.
Ian felt heat rising in his cheeks and he pulled his attention back to the apples. Intently staring at each one as he loaded it into the bin.
He saw Mickey reach for one out of the corner of his eye, his tattooed knuckles gave Mickey the look of a convict, something that Ian was sure was in his future.
Mickey grabbed an apple from the bottom of the sales bin, causing all the other apples to roll and slip out of their precarious places, some tumbling out of the box.
“Whoops.” Mickey laughed bringing the apple to his lips and taking a bite out of it.
“Dammit Milkovich.” Ian muttered under his breath as he crouched down to pick up the now bruised apples that had fallen onto the floor.
“What? It was an accident Gallagher.” Mickey said apologetically, surprising Ian as he reached onto the ground to pick up one of the apples.
“Mickey, you’ll have to pay for any that are bruised.” Kash’s voice meekly said from the register.
Ian’s eyes widened and he looked up at Mickey, whose jaw clenched, and eyes narrowed.
Mickey straightened up and looked at Kash for a moment before hurling the apple at Kash.
“Mickey!” Ian shouted as he looked at Kash frantically to make sure he was okay, and that the apple didn’t hit him.
Kash ducked below the counter, Ian watched as he ducked and walked to the door to the back room and shut it behind him.
“Fucking pansy ass.” Mickey grunted.
Ian looked up at Mickey angrily from his position on the floor, “That was out of line Mickey.” He said trying to keep his voice from wavering.
Mickey chuckled, rubbing the space between his inky eyebrows with his middle finger, “Gallagher, why do you even give a rat’s ass?”
Ian felt his face heat again as he rose from the ground standing in front of Mickey, he hadn’t realized before that he was an inch or two taller than he was. His big personality and swagger that he walked with made him seem much taller.
Ian opened his mouth to speak but the words that he was formulating in his mind weren’t willing to come out. ‘Because I love him, because I don’t want anyone to hurt him, because you’re a thug, because he already has a hard time with his wife being mean to him.’ None of those were wanting to be formed by his lips, instead he just pressed them together in a thin line.
Mickey raised an eyebrow at him pursing his lips with a half-smile, his eyes meeting Ian’s, something flickering in his them that Ian couldn’t identify.
“Gallagher, you’re with-you’re with my sister, and she likes your scrawny ass, so she wants me looking out for you to make sure you aren’t getting yourself into trouble, I can do that while still giving you a hard time.” Mickey’s voice was soft and his tone low, as if he were telling Ian a secret, which in a way he was. The secret was that he could be nice.
“That fucking pussy of a boss you have, there’s something about him that I don’t trust. He looks at you like you’re I dunno a fucking bacon cheeseburger or something.” Mickey scoffed waving a hand back at where Kash had run off to.
“He’s Muslim.” Ian countered with a laugh.
“What the fuck do I care? Just because he isn’t supposed to eat pig meat doesn’t mean he doesn’t.” Mickey rolled his eyes.
They stood there together for a moment, and for the first time Ian felt something more towards Mickey, felt like he was more than just the neighborhood thug.
“Well, thanks for looking out for me, you-“ Ian started before Mickey cut him off.
“I’m doing fuck-all for you, this is for Mandy.” Mickey corrected, irritation seeping into his tone.
“Right, you know you don’t have to. I’m fine here, Kash is, nice.” Ian tried to keep the fondness he had for Kash out of his voice.
Mickey wasn’t buying it, “Uh-huh, whatever Gallagher, I told Mandy I’d look out for you especially with that fuck head so that’s what I’m gonna do.” Mickey started walking off towards the door to the shop.
“Doesn’t mean we’re friends or some shit.” He called over his shoulder as he shoved the door open and left the store.
Ian couldn’t help the small smile that slid onto his face.
After that day Mickey would come into Kash and Grab during Ian’s shifts, usually not saying much to Ian, even giving him withering looks when he said hello to Mickey. At the first sight of Mickey Kash would silently excuse himself to the safe room and wait out Mickey’s visit there.
“So, tomorrow’s my birthday.” Ian said to Mickey as he flicked through a magazine standing at the counter where Ian manned the register.
“What do you want a fucking present?” Mickey asked his brows furrowing, not looking up from the magazine he was looking at.
“No, I just, I won’t be working tomorrow, so you don’t have to come in to do your Mandy secret-ops.” Ian said with a small smile.
Mickey’s eyes flickered from the magazine to Ian’s and his lips formed a smirk, “Noted.”
They stood there in silence for a moment, Mickey flipped another page in the magazine, “Birthday huh?” He asked one eyebrow cocked inquisitively.
“Yeah, I’ll be sixteen.” Ian tried to keep the excitement out of his voice, but it wasn’t easy to dampen.
“Ah, the magical birthday.” Mickey forced a laugh and an eye roll.
“Yeah, I’m excited for it.” Ian paused a moment, then remembered that Mickey was older than him.
“You’re seventeen, aren’t you?” He asked Mickey cautiously.
“I’m eighteen, yes I know about the colors, no I wasn’t suddenly blessed with the sight of color on my birthday.” Mickey answered Ian’s next question before he even was able to voice it.
“What about now that you’re eighteen? Have you seen colors yet?” Ian’s tone was light and curious.
Mickey looked up at Ian and looked at him, his gaze cold, his jaw clenched, and his brow furrowed.
“I mean it’s okay if you haven’t yet, a lot of people don’t see them until they’re older like twenties and thirties. Kash didn’t see his until a couple weeks ago and he’s like thirty-five. It’s rare for teenagers to see colors, but it does happen.” Ian noticed he was rambling, but he wanted to wash over what he said in case he had upset Mickey in some way, his reaction was surprising.
An uncomfortable silence filled the air between them, and Ian looked away from Mickey down at the countertop, looking upside-down at the magazine pages he was on.
“I-I see them, the-the colors.” Mickey’s voice was barely above a whisper when he spoke, but it was loud enough to make Ian’s face snap up to look at him.
“You do?” Ian asked incredulously.
“What like it’s that fucking surprising that I have a fucking soulmate?” Mickey snapped defensively a pained look flashing across his face.
Ian’s eyes widened at how defensive Mickey was being, “I didn’t say that.” He mumbled dropping his gaze.
“You implied it.” Mickey snapped flicking the pages in his magazine sharply making them snap.
Ian looked back up at Mickey, his face was pinched, and his lips were in a thin hard line.
“Mickey I’m sorry if what I said or didn’t say offended you. No, I don’t think it’s surprising that you have a soulmate. It is surprising that you’ve already found one at your age, I told you teenagers usually don’t see the colors for a few years, and that it’s rare, like only a handful in the world every year. It’s magical that you’ve already seen them, seen your soulmate. You’re magical Mickey.” Ian felt his lips pulling up into a smile.
“Magical huh?” Mickey mumbled hesitantly, as if he were testing the word out to see if he liked it.
Mickey had let his guard down just enough for a crooked smile to appear. Ian felt a flutter in his chest and felt as if his stomach was flipping over inside of him.
Ian felt a warmth spreading through his veins, Mickey’s smile was really nice, it was genuine, making him look less haggard and irritated, compared to when it was fake, he looked menacing.
“You have a nice smile.” Ian said hesitantly, worried about pressing his luck when it came to doling out compliments to Mickey Milkovich. The bell above the door jangled making them both jump as a couple of people came in, blowing in a cold breeze with it.
Mickey’s smile shrank into itself making his mouth a small thin line, his back stiffened and he glanced over his shoulder to the people that walked in.
“Be careful Gallagher. I told Mandy I’d keep an eye out for you, but if you keep spewing this faggoty crap all over me I’ll be the one beating your ass to a pulp.” Mickey’s voice was low and rumbling, the threat not meeting his eyes.
With that final word Mickey shoved away from the counter and stormed out the door, the bells jangling loudly with the force behind it.
Ian frowned and his gaze dropped to his hands on the counter, his thoughts drifting to Mickey as he finished his shift.
Ian woke up the day of his birthday excited to go to see his friends and see Kash. Today was the day and he could feel it in his bones.
“Can you see the colors yet?” Debbie asked him as they ate birthday pancakes at the table.
“That would mean one of us is his soulmate Debs.” Lip laughed ruffling his sister’s hair.
“Oh right, well if you see colors today Ian you have to tell me everything, I want to know what color the sky is, what color my hair is, what color your hair is, I want to know what green looks like.” Debbie continued to rattle on what she wanted Ian to tell her when he got home if it was the day he could see the colors.
Ian dressed in a nicer hand-me-down long sleeved button up over a plain shirt and a dark pair of jeans. He tugged his shoes on and grabbed his warm coat as he walked out the door, slipping it on over himself.
Ian tried to keep himself from running to the store, the excitement he felt was thrumming in his chest, beating hard like a drum. He picked up the pace and began to run there, not able to contain himself for much longer.
Reaching the store he felt like his heart was going to burst out of his chest, a big smile on his face making his cheeks hurt, he grabbed the push handle and swung open the door. The momentum of him launching himself making him go until his footing went THUNK THUNK THUNK stopping just at the counter.
“Kash!” Ian shouted not able to hold in his excitement any longer, especially since he didn’t see Linda anywhere.
Kash stumbled out of the dairy cooler, looking around surprised to hear someone shouting his name. Seeing Ian, he turned back towards the cooler a moment before coming towards Ian, his hands patting down his hair and adjusting his shirt. Ian raised an eyebrow at him as he stood there panting to catch his breath.
“Hey birthday boy, happy birthday!” Kash exclaimed coming to Ian and wrapping his arms around him tightly in a hug.
“Thanks! I was too excited to wait and come by, I had to come as soon as I could.” Ian explained pulling away from Kash and looking at him closely.
“So, what do you think?” Kash asked placing his hands on Ian’s hips and pulling him a bit closer to himself.
Ian felt his stomach drop, when he looked at Kash, really looked at him, nothing changed, his vision was still shades of gray, no color at all, not even a speck.
Ian’s face fell, “I still don’t see the colors.” Ian murmured, his voice heavy with sadness and surprise.
Kash moved his hands away from Ian’s hips and took a step back.
“You don’t see the colors?” Kash asked slowly, his eyes wide.
“No, I’m sorry Kash, I thought today was going to be the day, that it was going to be you.” Ian’s voice wavered slightly, the sadness overtaking the surprise.
“Hey, it’s okay, maybe you aren’t getting me in the right light or something. Fluorescents can probably mess with it more than they report. Besides the day is still early, why don’t you come back later, see if it being later in the day makes a difference.” Kash prattled on waving his hands around nervously.
“It doesn’t change anything between us, right?” Kash’s voice was soft and wavering slightly.
Ian looked up at Kash, “No no no, it doesn’t change anything at all.” Ian placed both of his hands on the sides of Kash’s face and forced a smile on his lips.
“It doesn’t change a thing.” Ian reassured with a small nod, and he got on his tiptoes and placed a kiss on Kash’s lips.
As their lips were pressing together the bell above the door chimed, they broke apart quickly and Kash turned to see who came in, nervous about being caught. Ian looked down at the floor, not wanting the person at the door to be Linda, afraid that it was when he heard the lock turn.
“Well, no wonder Mandy wanted me to keep an eye on you.” A familiar voice rumbled from the door.
Ian’s head snapped up to look at Mickey standing in the doorway, and he felt like the wind had been knocked out of him.
Mickey wasn’t in the familiar shades of black and white and gray that he had seen all his life, he was painted with colors, brilliant colors that bloomed around him, everything around him adorning with hues of pigments that Ian had never imagined before.
Ian’s eyes widened as he took in everything, every new color that Mickey brought out, had brought to him. His eyes were sparkling, a light color that reminded Ian of the stars that he could glimpse of at night. His hair remained the dark black color of ink, but his skin, his face, a creamy fair tint made him look ethereal. His lips were turned up at the sides in a small, shy smile.
“It’s you.” Ian breathed.
Mickey nodded, shoving his hands in his coat pockets.
“It’s him?!” Kash shouted in disbelief a hand thrown up gesturing at Mickey.
Ian had forgotten that anyone else existed outside of him and Mickey, he turned and looked at Kash. His skin was dark, a warm color, his eyes were almost similar in shade. His hair was inky like Mickey’s, but it was longer, and it hung in his face.
Ian nodded wordlessly looking back to Mickey.
Kash grunted in frustration and stormed off from where he had been standing with Ian. Slamming the door to the safe room he left them alone in silence.
“So, I see the colors with you,” Ian paused licking his lips nervously, “does that mean, did you see them, with me?” Ian’s voice was barely above a whisper when he asked Mickey this question.
Mickey was his soulmate, but was he Mickeys? Was everyone destined together who saw the colors? What if one person saw the colors, but the other one didn’t with that person? What if someone was polyamorous and had several loves and soulmates? What if…
“Y-yes.” Mickey stuttered, barely able to produce the word loud enough for Ian to hear from where he stood.
“So that means, we’re soulmates.” Ian said finally letting everything sink in fully.
“Took you long enough Einstein.” Mickey chuckled taking a step towards Ian.
“So that means you’re gay too?” Ian asked, surprised by Mickey Milkovich for the second time in less than an hour.
“Uh, yeah, but that’s not, that’s… No one knows, except you.” Mickey said haltingly, a flash of fear in his eyes.
Ian nodded, not surprised, Mickey’s dad was a horrendous person that struck fear into anyone who crossed his path.
Mickey took another step towards Ian his eyes searching over every inch of Ian’s face.
“Mandy isn’t really my girlfriend; she was just covering for me so you and your brothers wouldn’t beat me up.” Ian said with a laugh.
Mickey laughed, “Yeah I figured that one out on my own, but thanks for the tutoring notes.”
Ian chuckled and took a step towards Mickey, they were barely a step apart now, Ian wanted to reach out and touch Mickey’s face, wanted to hold him close as he looked at the beautiful color that was swirling in his eyes.
“When did you see the colors for the first time?” Ian asked him, his brow furrowing.
Mickey laughed and brought and hand up to Ian’s face tentatively letting his fingertips trail along the side of Ian’s face, “I knew when I came in here for the first time and saw your ginger ass sweeping the floor.”
“The day you knocked over the pumpkin display for Halloween?” Ian asked remembering having to sweep again after Mickey left because he had knocked some pumpkins and straw over as he hurried out the store.
Mickey laughed, “It was a way to get your attention, forgot you were a couple years younger than me though. Not that much older than you thankfully, unlike that fucking pedophile who was sniffing around you when I got here.” Mickey growled looking over Ian’s shoulder to where he knew Kash was hiding.
“He doesn’t matter now,” Ian said bringing Mickey’s attention back to his face.
“No one else does, except you and me,” Ian’s eyebrows knitted together and he felt a pang go through his heart.
Mickey smiled easily, and leaned forward as Ian did the same, he gently pressed a kiss to Ian’s lips.
Ian felt like fireworks were going off in his chest and in his head, like stars were exploding and that the world was resetting around him.
Their kiss broke and Mickey’s eyes searched Ian’s face.
“Wow.” Ian breathed looking up into Mickey’s eyes.
“Still magical?” Mickey asked with a raised eyebrow and a chuckle.
Ian laughed, “Fuck you.” He said then he grabbed Mickey by his jacket and pulled his face to his, pressing his lips against his soulmates for their second, of hundreds of thousands of kisses.